King
by whatthefuckisupkyle
Summary: Jane King takes on an unexpected friendship with a Curtis, and it slowly changes her life.
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

A/N: A year or two after the book.

Chapter 1:

* * *

Paul amazed me. He really did. I never could grasp how someone could be so well-liked, yet so thoughtless.

Don't get me wrong. Paul wasn't a bad person. He wasn't a good person, but he wasn't a _bad_ person. He was just so reckless and even though he was smarter than he let on, he made some dumb decisions. He started fights for almost no reason and he never thought before he did. He was one of the toughest guys at school, if not the toughest. That gained him a lot of recognition with everyone and before he was fourteen, he had his own gang, the River Kings.

The River Kings - what good things could I say about them? Almost nothing, to be honest. The River Kings were just a gang that was made up of my brother's buddies, Joey, Ricky, Chip and Todd. They fought with a lot of gangs, very roughly, over petty things, like whose girl was whose or whose territory was whose. Sometimes they fought about stuff that was worth fighting for, but rarely. The only good thing that came out of the River Kings was that they were like a second family to both Paul and I. They were always there when we needed them and always there when we didn't.

My other brother David was apart of the gang too, but he's smarter than the rest of them. He knew when to fight and when not to. Besides, he's usually too busy working to care about girls and territories. That was why David was my favourite.

"...And then I slugged 'im."

My brother got loud encouragement from his gang. Then it wasn't long before he needed something from me.

"Janey!"

"What?" I said loudly, so he could hear me from the kitchen.

"Get me a beer!"

I rolled my eyes. "Get it yourself!"

"Janey!"

"What?"

"Did you not hear me?"

I angrily my pencil down and stalked over to the fridge. I opened it up, grabbed a beer, walked to the living room and threw it into his lap.

"There." I smiled smugly. "Happy?"

Paul mimicked my smile. "Very."

"Hey, Janey, I heard you got expelled."

I rolled my eyes at Chip. "Where'd you hear that one from?"

"Is it true?" Joey asked.

I sighed. "Yeah."

Chip cheered and put up his hand for a high-five. "Yeah, Janey!" I reluctantly gave him a high-five. "Did you pound her good?"

I nodded. "Yeah, Chip, I did."

Chip smiled widely. "Right on."

"Janey," Paul said warningly. "I wanted a beer and I got it, now split."

I rolled my eyes, but listened. I walked back into the kitchen and picked up my pencil again, thinking about how anyone in the entire world could like Paul.

"Jane!" My mother called. "Dinner!"

I groaned, got up and went to the kitchen. I sat down with my mother, father and brothers at the dining room table, dinner in front of me.

"Jane," my father said in his always-stern voice. "We need to talk about school."

I picked up my fork at pointed at him. "Yes. Yes, we do." I started to dig in and my father breathed out like an angry bull.

"Jane. I'm not happy that you were expelled."

"Yeah." I shrugged. "Guess I wasn't really feeling it."

Paul laughed.

"Don't encourage her, Paul," my mother said.

"Sorry, ma." Paul didn't sound apologetic in the least.

"I'm being serious, Jane. I'm not happy and there _will_ be punishment."

I got goose bumps at his voice, but didn't show the least bit on fright. I just put my fork down and stood up. "You know what, I'm not all that hungry. I think I'll just go to Donna's."

"You sit down right now!"

I ignored my father's protest and started walking out of the room.

He caught my arm with his strong grip and spun me around. "I said, sit down."

"Fine." I yanked my arm out of his grip. When he turned around, I booked it out of the house.

"Jane!"

I ran out of the house and down the street. I slowed into a walk when I thought I was far enough. I pulled out a cigarette and tried to light it, but I already knew my lighter was running out of juice, so I wasn't surprised when it didn't light.

"Shit."

"Foul words for a pretty lady."

I smiled at the voice and turned around. "Cut the shit, Ray."

He smiled too, walking over to me and giving me a big kiss on the mouth. After that, he pulled out a lighter and lit my cigarette. "I got you, baby."

I pushed him away and laughed. "Shut up."

"What're you doin' out here anyway?"

I shook my head. "I don't really know. Just had to get out, I guess."

Ray smirked. "Wanna go back to my place?"

I scoffed. "No."

"C'mon, Jane." Ray put his arm around me. "Let's -"

"Jane!" my brother yelled at me. "Get your ass over here."

I sighed and shook off Ray's arm. I walked over to my brother and punched him in the shoulder, showing no animosity towards him. "You didn't have to come after me. I was doin' fine."

Paul scoffed. "Yeah. Meetin' up with Ray of the Tiber Street Wimps is doin' just fine."

I rolled my eyes as Paul stepped around me, and I tried to catch his jacket. "Paul, don't."

It was no use. Paul stepped around me and walked in front of Ray. "Ray."

"Paul."

"You know this isn't your turf. What're you doin' here?"

Ray's eyes glanced to mine. "I came for your sister, Paul. She's comin' with me."

"Like hell she is. Get lost, candyass." I put my head down to hide my smirk as Paul continued. "You stay on your turf and we'll stay on ours, you dig?"

Ray nodded. "Yeah, I dig." Then he winked at me. "I'll see you 'round, Jane." He walked off down the street with a confident stride, with only seemed to fuel Paul's fire.

Paul turned my way with an angry expression. "The hell are you doin' out here with Ray Tanner?" He pointed a finger at me. "I told you, if I ever caught you with him again, I'd skin you."

I smirked. "You wouldn't do that to your little sister."

Paul rolled his eyes and started walking. "Let's go."

"Where we goin'?"

"Home."

I turned in the other direction. "No."

"Jane," Paul said sternly.

"Paul," I mocked in the same tone.

"I'm gonna tell dad that you're hangin' out with older boys."

"Then you'll get lickin' too 'cause you were spying."

Paul crossed his arms angrily. "Shut up, Jane. We're goin' home now." He turned back around.

I sighed and followed. I didn't feel like fighting with Paul tonight and if I came back now, my father might not be so harsh on me.

"And take that damn thing out of your mouth."

I grumbled and threw the cigarette away. "Happy?"

Paul smiled smugly. "Very."

We walked back to the house slowly, enjoying the night air and the eery silence. When Paul and I walked back into the house, we were arguing, of course.

"I just don't see how -"

"Jane," David greeted me from the couch. "You're lucky dad's not here right now or you'd be gettin' it good."

I smiled, plopping down next to him. "How was work?"

"It was work. How was dinner?" David gave me a sly smile.

"She nearly got her ass kicked right there at the table, David." Paul made a face at me. "She's a ditz."

"At least I'm not a square."

Paul was definitely no square, but I knew it would bug him.

"I'm not a square!"

"Cut it out!" David stopped us from starting all over again. "You two are so immature."

I smiled, patting David's knee. "You love us."

"You _do_ love us." Paul made a kissing face at David.

David laughed and pushed him away. "Go do your homework or somethin'." Paul nodded, though I had serious doubt he was going to do his homework. "You too, Jane."

My eyes narrowed. "Did mom tell you what happened today?"

David's full attention was at me. "What happened?"

"I got expelled."

David groaned. "Jane."

"I know, but the bitch was asking for it."

"Watch your mouth."

I resisted rolling my eyes, only because I actually liked David. "Yes, sir."

David went back to the TV. "What did dad say?"

"Nothing yet. As you know, I ran out before he could say anything."

"Well," David sighed. "You should go to your room then. Dad will be home soon."

I got up and went straight to my room, hoping that if my dad came home and didn't see me, he'd let it be until tomorrow.

* * *

In the morning, Paul went off the school and David to work. My dad was at work too, thankfully. That left me with my mom and, boy, did she have a surprise for me.

"Good morning," she said to me as I walked into the kitchen.

"Mornin'." I sat down at the table just as she placed a pancake on my plate.

"Eat up," she said with a smile. "You've got school soon."

"What?"

"Honey..." My mom sat down and grabbed my hand. "I enrolled you at Will Rogers High School."

My mouth fell open. "What? You - you did what?" I raised my eyebrows.

"You're a smart girl, Jane. You deserve to go to a better school."

I pulled my hand away. "You only put me there because I got expelled. Are you sending me away now?" I stood up, ready to get out of the house.

"No, honey. No, that's not it."

I shook my head and crossed my arms. "Why would I go there?"

My mom sighed. "Your father is willing to forget about last night if you go easily."

"Fine," I said rather quickly, knowing there was no negotiating a better deal than that. "I'll do it."

"You'll like it here."

I tried to smile, but I couldn't. "Yeah."

* * *

"Well -" The teacher stopped and gestured toward the door. "This is your first class. Good luck."

I nodded, opening the door and walking in. The whole class stopped and looked at me, even the teacher just stared.

"Hey, uh, I'm the new student." I walked over to the teacher and handed him the paper I was supposed to give him. The teacher took the paper and gave it a look over, like he didn't care...Probably because he didn't.

"Take a seat," he said, not looking up.

"Thanks, man." The teacher raised his brows at me and I retreated. "I mean sir."

"That's better. Take a seat." The threw the paper on his desk and looked up at me. "I said take a seat."

"Oh," I said, walking to the back of the class to an empty seat. I sat down and put down my book, opening it and starting to write down something to make it look like I was paying attention.

I didn't notice someone staring at me until I looked around the classroom and my eyes met some guy two seats away from me.

He had light brown hair. That was the first thing I noticed. The second thing I noticed was that he was handsome. Not my type, but very handsome.

When he saw that he was caught, he seemed startled. He looked away quickly and coughed into his hand. I laughed and went back to my booklet, still pretending to pay attention.

I had to sit in that class for the whole hour. There were no bathroom brakes - the ones I usually took right before I decided I didn't want to go back to class. I just did my work at home and handed in the next day, and my grades were fine - better than fine even. But that time, I sat in the class and actually took notes.

When it was over, everyone rushed out of the small door. Some kid bumped into me because he was rushing out.

"Watch it, dude."

"Sorry," he said nervously. It was that kid that was looking at me.

I stopped in my tracks as he raced off down the hallway. "Hey!" I yelled before I could register it myself. "Wait up!" I ran after him.

"Oh." He seemed really surprised by my appearance beside him.

"Hey." I smiled. "My name's Jane." I stuck out my hand.

He took it hesitantly, his soft hand shaking mine gently. "Ponyboy."

"No shit." I laughed. "Curtis, right?"

He nodded. "Yeah."

"Your brother is one sharp guy," I said. Sodapop sure was a looker. "You are too."

Ponyboy's cheeks looked like they reddened. "Uh, thanks."

I bumped his shoulder. Or I tried to with the height difference. "You can really thank me by walking me to my next class."

"Sure."

I handed him my schedule and he looked at it peculiarly. "What?"

"Jane King?"

"Yeah."

"Like the 'River Kings' King? Like Paul and David King?"

I nodded and smiled. "Yeah, you know 'em or something?"

"Everyone knows the River Kings. Sometimes my friend Steve talks smack about your brother Paul."

I smiled, loving that simple fact. "Someone should. Paul's an idiot."

Ponyboy laughed. "So what'd you have to do to get kicked out of your old school?"

I shrugged. "I beat someone up."

Pony raised his eyebrows. "A guy?"

"A girl." I corrected. "She was being a bitch."

Pony seemed uncomfortable with my sudden swearing, but he gave me a small smile anyway. "I'd hate to be that girl."

I smiled. I liked this kid. "I like you, Ponyboy. You seem pretty cool."

"Thanks."

"Anytime."

* * *

"Jane."

I nodded civilly. "Paul."

"How was your first day at Roger Will?"

"Will Rogers."

"What the hell ever. How was it?"

I sighed, setting my back down on floor and sitting down on the couch. "Not too shabby. You know the Curtis's?"

Paul nodded. "I know of them."

"I met the youngest. Ponyboy was his name."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. He was nice and pretty sharp. He -"

"Stop. No, stop."

I laughed. "Yeah, he was _fine_."

"Jane!"

"What?" I laughed. "I listen to you go on about how 'Caroline is a stone fox'."

Paul shook his head and pointed a finger. "That's different!"

"Hi, honey." My mom came into the living room.

"Hey, mom." She gave me a weird look and fiddled with her apron. "Mom?"

"Your school called today."

I quickly thought back earlier in the day.

 _I could only take so much, and let me tell you, my five minutes of fame were up._

 _"Hey." Someone grabbed my shoulder._

 _I spun around, knocking their hand off me in annoyance. I stopped when I saw who it was. "Ray. What're you doing here?"_

 _"Heard you got put up in this hell hole. I'm here to rescue you." Ray smirked._

 _I resisted the urge to grab his hand and run off, thinking about the disappointment I'd earn later on. I don't wanna get in trouble on my first day, Ray."_

 _"What? That's not you, Janey."_

 _"No, it is me. It's **you** that wants to me to skip."_

 _Ray leaned in and kissed my cheek. "Janey." He stuck out his bottom lip. "Janey, please. For me?"_

 _My shoulders slumped, giving in. "Fine."_

I groaned. "I can explain."

"Explain what?" Paul asked.

"Butt out, Paul," I said to him.

Paul held his hands up and leaned into the couch. "I'm out."

"Your school called and said that you didn't show for your last two classes." My mom sighed, rubbing the permanent wrinkles on her forehead. "What happened?"

I tried shrugging it off. "I didn't feel like going."

My mom sighed again. "Jane."

"Ray showed and he wanted me to skip with him."

"Ray?" Paul said unbelievingly. "That son of a -"

"Paul!" My mom tried to scold him.

"Ma, Ray's a bad guy."

I rolled my eyes. "You just don't like him because he's a Tiber Street Tiger."

"Yeah! That isn't reason enough?" Paul asked, waving his hands around. "Ma, Ray's twenty!"

"Twenty?" My mom looked at me, eyes wide. "Jane, you're sixteen. Tell me this isn't true."

I got up. "Yeah, it is. Can we keep this between us?" I said, quickly changing the subject.

"Your father will find out eventually."

I sighed and shook my head. "Fine. Call me when dinner's ready."

"Jane."

"Don't." I put my hand out to stop her, walking to my room.

I went to my room and I sat on my newly washed sheets and I waited for the yelling. And it came sooner than I had thought. With the hour, I -

"Jane Teresa King!" My door swung open. "You are in big trouble, young lady." He walked over to me and grabbed my arm and made me stand up before bending me over his knee and whacking my backside.

I cringed, but sat through it. The less I said, the quicker it would be over. And eventually it ended, but being myself, I had to say the last word.

"Asshole." I only muttered it, but I muttered it loud enough for my dad to hear.

He spun around quickly, landing the backside of his hand on my cheek. "Don't ever say that to me again."

I held my cheek and nodded. He left, finally satisfied with himself.

I hated him. I knew you were supposed to love your parents no matter what, but I couldn't find it in me to love him.

I wasn't invited down the dinner and I had to sit in my room for the rest of the night alone until someone came knocking on my door. It was Paul.

"Hey." He closed the door behind him and held up an ice pack. "I come in peace."

I smiled, taking the ice pack from him. "Thanks."

"Yeah, sure." Paul sat down on my bed with me. "Why are you such a smart ass, Janey? If you hadn't said anything, you could've gotten off without the slap."

I sighed. "It was worth it."

Paul laughed. "You're so stupid."

"Hey." I smacked his arm. "Don't be an asshole."

We sat in silence for a couple minutes before Paul spoke up.

"Why'd you go with Ray anyway?"

"I don't know."

"God, I need to pound that guy."

"Don't have a cow, Pauly." I laughed. "And do me a solid. Don't tell David about this."

"About Ray or dad?"

"Both," I said, dabbing the cold pack against my burning cheek. "I know he doesn't like Ray and he'll start something with dad, so please keep this on the DL."

"You got it."

"Thanks, Paul."

"Am I your favourite brother now?"

"No."

* * *

A/N: There it is! Intro to a new Outsiders Fic.


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 2:

* * *

I sat down at me seat and opened my book.

"Hey, Jane."

I glanced at Pony. "Hey, Ponyboy."

"Wow," Pony marvelled. "That's a big bruise you've got there."

"Oh." I turned away from him, touching my sore cheek with light fingers. "Yeah."

"Did you get in another fight?"

I put on a cocky smile, despite the ache on my face. "Yeah. You should see the other guy."

Pony laughed. "I'm sure it's bad."

I sighed. "It wasn't too bad. I've had worse."

Pony gave me a look I didn't like at all. He looked like he felt bad for me. "Is that what it's liking growing up on the Southeast side of Tulsa? Or is it just because if the River Kings?"

My fingers twitched, feeling like I needed a cigarette between them. "Things are rough all around." I looked over to Pony, who was smiling. "What?"

"A girl said almost the exact same thing to me once."

I smiled. "Smart girl."

"Yeah, she was."

"You don't talk to her anymore?"

Pony sighed. "She's a Soc, so we never really talked."

"Oh," I said, surprised. Socs weren't a big deal on the Southeast side. It was more about the River Kings and the Tiber Street Tigers, and maybe the Packers, but not so much social class because we were all pretty well the same.

Coming to Will Rogers really opened my eyes. There were so clearly two different kinds of people. Socs and Greasers. It was so clear, you'd have to be stupid to mistake one for the other.

Yeah, sure, there were a couple gangs on this side of Tulsa. The Shepards Gang and the Brumly Boys. The Curtis gang was another, but from what I heard, they didn't really fight any other gangs. But then again, neither did the Shepards or the Brumly gang really. Or at least not like my brother's gang does.

So it was a little bit of a surprise to me that the biggest problem this side of Tulsa had was social class separation.

"Yeah," Pony said, bringing me back to the class.

"What happens if you date a Soc or somethin'?"

Pony almost laughed. "That would never happen."

"So if I wanted to ask out a Soc, they'd laugh in my face."

"Probably."

"What if _they_ asked _me_ out?"

"It'd be a joke."

"Wow." I leaned back in my seat. "They really don't talk to us greasers, huh?"

Pony shook his head. "No."

"Ms. King, Mr. Curtis!" The teacher yelled. "Silence please."

Pony nodded. "Yes, sir."

I covered my mouth to not laugh. "Sure."

"Detention for both of you." The teacher gave me a stern look before turning back to the board as I laughed into my jacket sleeve.

* * *

"Hi, honey."

"Hey, mom," I said quickly, walking straight to my room. I was walking so fast, I didn't even realized the big body in front of me.

"What's got you in a hurry?"

I kept my head down, walking past David. "Nothing."

David caught my arm and spun me around. "What -" He saw the bruise on my cheek and he shook his head. "God damnit, Jane."

"I skipped school and then I talked back. It was my fault."

"It's never your fault. Dad should never put his hands on you!"

"I know." I nodded. "But it's done now and I'm over it, so can you cool it?"

David sighed and rubbed his forehead. "I'm gonna have a chat with him."

"Please don't."

"What're you gonna do when I'm gone, Jane? Huh?" David said, growing more annoyed with my nonchalant attitude. "How are you gonna protect yourself?"

I hated talking about David leaving. David wasn't a teenager anymore and he had a nice girlfriend. It would make sense for him to want to move out and start a family with her. He'd been working since he was ten and he was starting to look at houses.

It made me nervous. David was the reason I was sane in the stupid house I lived in, and if he left, I didn't know what I'd do. It was selfish of me, but I didn't want him to leave. That, or make him take me with him.

"I don't know, David."

David turned around and walked into the kitchen as I walked to my room. Paul was in my room, screwing around with the stuff on my dresser.

"Paul!"

He turned my way, casual smile on his face. "Hey, sis."

"What're you doing?"

"I just asked out Catherine Jones. She said if I got her a present, she'd go out with me."

I walked over and pushed him away from my stuff. "Then buy her something. Don't touch my stuff."

"Why would I buy somethin' when you have a bunch of junk you don't use?"

I groaned and sat on my bed. "You can take one thing. One thing, Paul."

Paul laughed in triumph and took a bottle of perfume I never used. "Your school called _again._ Detention, huh?"

"I was barely even talking." I crawled onto my bed and curled into a comfortable ball. "Get out."

"Whatever you say, Janey."

After Paul left, I got up and opened my window.

Like hell if I was going to stick around and get beat for something as stupid as a detention.

I crawled out carefully. One time, I broke my ankle jumping out of my window. I was a lot more cautious now a days.

When my feet were planted on the ground, I started running down to a place my brothers hated me to be. But I knew Ray would be there and I just wanted a cigarette.

It really didn't take me long to get to Buck's, and I was so close before I got stopped.

"Jane King."

I heard that annoying but lovable voice from behind me. "Curly Shepard."

Curly smirked and stepped closer to me. I noticed he had Pony and some other kid by his side. "Pony told me you were on this side of Tulsa. I had to see it to believe it."

"Well, here I am." I held out my hands and spun around.

Curly nodded to the building behind me. "You headin' in there?"

"Yeah, I was looking for Ray."

Curly smirked. "You know you don't need Ray when you got me."

The only reason I knew Curly Shepard was because he had a habit of putting himself in places he didn't need to be in, like in the middle of a turf war between the River Kings and the Tiber Street Tigers.

I laughed and shook my head, switching my sight to Pony, who had been silently standing beside the loud-moused, curly-headed one. "Hey, Pony."

He waved, but didn't say anything.

I shrugged. "Well, I best be off. See you guys later."

"See ya, Jane."

I turned around and walked into to Bucks. It was easy to find Ray. He was surrounded by a bunch of beautiful girls on the ugly couch.

I walked up to him and put my hands on my hips. "Ray."

Ray smirked. "Hey, baby."

"You got a cigarette?" I asked.

"Yeah." Ray reached into his pocket and passed me his pack. "Go nuts, kid."

I leaned over to table, putting my face close to his. "Thanks." I reached into his pocket and pulled out his lighter before pushing myself away from him and walking off to the bar.

I lit my cigarette and took a puff.

"Jane King."

I was getting tired of hearing that. "What do you want, Chip?"

A member of my brother's gang and a major pain in my ass.

"Do your brothers know you're here?" he asked, and he had a wide smirk on his face.

"I hate you. Did you know that?" I said, only making his smirk grow. "I hate you."

"Ah, I know." Chip leaned against the bar and put up his hand. "Two beers, please."

I raised my eyebrows. "Trying to get on my good side?"

Chip shook his head. "Don't tell your brothers about this."

"You got it, Chip." I raised my cigarette to him as he pushed a beer toward me.

"God damn, Janey," Chip said, sounding like he was regretting his decision. "Your brothers will kick my ass if they know about this."

"You can trust me."

"Fine," he said, leaning off of the bar and starting to walk away. "Holler if you need me."

"Sure, Chip." I smiled, going back to my cigarette and my beer. This was way better than sitting around, waiting to get beat for getting a stupid detention. On the other hand, my brothers would've been pissed.

"Janey, Janey, Janey."

I smiled. "Ray, Ray, Ray."

"What're you doin' out here?"

"Got detention."

Ray laughed. "Your daddy kick you out?"

"No. I ran before he could do shit." I took a sip of my beer.

"You goin' home after this?"

"I don't know."

"You can always come back to my place," Ray said, leaning closer to me.

"Oh, Ray. You're my knight in shining armour."

Ray slipped behind me and put his arms around my stomach. He kissed my neck and whispered in my ear, "I've got you."

I elbowed him. "Not tonight."

Ray groaned and stepped away from me. "Fine. I got some blonde beauties waiting for me anyway."

I tipped my beer to him. "Knock yourself out."

Ray clicked his tongue and turned around, resuming his surely liberating conversation with the blonde girls on the couch.

* * *

I slowly slid into my room, but lost my grip and dropped onto my floor.

"Ow! Shit!"

"Shit is right."

I gasped and stood up quickly. "Paul, hey."

"Where the hell were you?"

"Church," I muttered sarcastically.

"Jane."

"I was at Bucks, Paul. Is that what you wanted to hear?"

Paul stomped his foot and spazzed out, trying to keep quiet because it was late. "No! God damnit, Jane! What were you doing there?"

"I don't think you want to know," I said, getting up and jumping into my bed, hiccuping in the process.

"Are you drunk?"

I smiled. "No."

Paul marched over to me. "You're drunk off your ass."

I groaned, rolling over. "Maybe."

Paul leaned closer to me, sniffing my jacket. "And you were smoking. What did I tell you about that, Jane?"

"Jesus, Paul, back off. You're not my dad."

"I'm the closest thing you've got."

I sighed, knowing it was true.

David and Paul pretty much raised me. My dad was too drunk to remember I was his daughter and my mom was too busy trying to take care of him. I spent a lot of time with my brothers. Even though we fought, I loved them more than anyone else on the entire planet.

"I know."

"Shit, Jane." Paul laid down next to me. "When I say something, you have to listen. You hear me?"

"Yeah."

"That means no smoking, no drinking, and no Bucks."

"What about Ray?"

"I can't control you that much." Paul sighed. "But if I see you with him, I'm gonna kick his ass."

I smiled. "Alright."

Paul breathed out through his nose loudly and shuffled around in my bed.

I rolled my eyes, knowing that he wouldn't move now. "Paul..."

"Ssh."

I laughed, rolling the other way and closing my eyes.

* * *

"King! Left-Mid!"

I squinted at my gym teacher. "Left what?"

"Left-Mid, King!"

I looked around to see if anyone else understood a single word the lady was saying.

I saw Pony standing around the track and stretching. He paused for a second to point to the left side of the soccer field. "The middle left of the field, Jane!"

I quickly got in my position and looked down at my shoes when the whistle went. Everyone started moving except for me. I looked around helplessly.

In my old school, we didn't have a gym class. I mean, we had a gym class, but no one ever actually did anything.

"Move, King, move!"

I groaned, running down the field until I gave up. I pulled out a cigarette and lighter out of my sock. I lit the cigarette and took a puff as everyone else ran around me.

"Trash." A girl spat at my shoes as she ran past me. I flipped her the bird and took another puff of my cigarette.

"King!" The teacher yelled.

"What?"

"Get over here!"

I walked over casually. "Yeah?"

She had her hands on her hips and a stern look on her face. "Get that thing out of your mouth and run laps."

I moved to the track, but didn't throw away my cigarette. I was going to enjoy my cigarette whether I was 'allowed' to or not.

"Jane."

I laughed. "How do you keep showing up?"

Ray shrugged and put his arm around me. "I came for you as I always do."

"Ray." I elbowed his arm off of me. "Go home."

"It's been days, Jane." Ray stepped in front of me. "Come on."

I stuck my cigarette between his lips. "You're gonna have to try harder than that."

Ray smirked, taking the cigarette between his fingers. "You are so hot, you know that?"

I smiled. "I've been told."

"I'll get you later on, Janey." Ray stepped away from me, taking my cigarette with him. "I'll pick you up at 7 o'clock."

"Make it 5."

* * *

I walked inside my house after my quick and ultimately disappointing hangout with Peter, trying to keep quiet. It was dark and not a sound of anyone, but as soon as I closed the door, the lights flicked on and someone grabbed a good chunk of my hair.

"There you are!"

I could smell the alcohol on his breath. "Jesus," I merely gasped out.

He yanked my head back, causing my to scream out. He let go eventually, only to spin me around and slap me. "It's all your fault!"

"You son of a bitch!" David yelled and passed me to go to our dad.

I sighed in relief at his voice as well as Paul's effortless ability to pull me away from any bad situation.

Paul took me by arm and rushed me to his room. He sat me on his bed and handed me an icepack.

"Thank you."

"What'd you do this time?" Paul asked, sitting down next to me.

I shook my head. "I don't know. Maybe something to do with the bills. I don't know."

Paul sighed. "Stop worryin' about that."

"It's all my fault, isn't it? We wouldn't be having this money problem if I hadn't gotten expelled."

"Jesus, Jane," Paul groaned. "I don't know."

I put rested the icepack against my cheek and sighed deeply. "I'm so stupid."

"Yeah."

"I don't need you guys to save me, you know?"

Paul scoffed. "Yeah, right. Dad would've broke you."

I rolled my eyes. "I could've handled it."

"Bullshit. You were lucky David was there."

"David won't always be there," I said, giving into the fact that I needed the help. "What happens when David gets his house he's been dreaming about forever, huh?"

Paul gave me a hard look. "We'll be screwed, that's what."

"I think he knows that too."

"He's not gonna stay around forever, Jane. He's got a girl and a job and an actual life."

I leaned back and laid down on Paul's bed. "It's a tough world out there. I'm still hoping he'll come back."

Paul leaned back too. "Stop talkin' about him like he's gone already."

"He's about to be. Caught him talking to Molly yesterday about a little house on the other side of Tulsa."

David came barging into Paul's room at that moment. "Jane, you okay?"

I sat up and nodded, showing his my icepack. "I'm fine. You okay?"

David took the collar of his shirt and wiped his bloody nose. "I'm fine."

I stood up and handed him the icepack. "You could use it more than me."

"Thanks," David said, putting his arm around me and bringing me into a side-hug.

"Anything for my favourite brother," I said, pulling away.

"Oh, I love you guys, too," Paul said sarcastically.

* * *

The next day was easier than I thought. I mean, seriously, people barely looked at me. They were probably very used to seeing black eyes and bruises. I enjoyed the little attention. That is, until Ponyboy couldn't stop staring at me.

"What?" I said, finally having enough.

Pony seemed startled as he shifted in his seat. "Nothin'."

"I got it in another fight, if that's what you wanted to know."

"How many fights do you get in?"

I sighed. "A lot."

"I can see that."

"Then why'd you ask?"

Ponyboy didn't break this time. He just stared at me with almost no expression. "I don't know."

"Well -" I pulled a cigarette out of my pocket. "I want to get out of here."

"Ms. King!"

I smirked at my teacher, leaving the cigarette between my lips. "Yes?"

"Get out of my classroom right now!" The teacher yelled.

"Why of course." I picked up my bag and walked past her.

Free at last.

At that moment, I could care less about what my dad would do when I got home. I was done with school for the day.

I was making my way down the steps when Amy Jensen appeared at my side, skirt tight, shirt low, hair big. She was in my Chemistry class and boy did she love to copy off of the little notes I took.

I think she thought we were friends.

"Skippin' out?"

I nodded, walking on and hoping that she would leave me alone. "Uh-huh."

"Where to?"

"Home," I answered simply.

She smirked, pulling out a pack of cigarettes and took one out for herself. "I could get us some free beers down at Bucks."

* * *

Everything tasted better when it was free. That was what happened when I started guzzling down a ton of beers at Bucks.

"Woo! Yeah!" Amy threw her arms around as she danced and drank and danced and drank and drank.

I pushed myself off the counter, walking a little closer to her, making sure to duck when she spun around. "Uh, hey, Amy..."

"Yeah?" she said, looking down at me with her drunk eyes.

"I'm gonna get some air," I told her, sticking my cigarette between my lips and not waiting for an answer as I went outside.

The fresh, brisk air was like a slap to the face.

I sighed, walking around the little deck in front of the building to go around to the back, passing all of the very drunk boys in front.

"How you doin', baby?"

I stopped walking to glare at him, taking the cigarette from my mouth and blowing out some smoke. "Piss off." I raised the cig to my lips once again as I walked away, right around to the back of the building. When I made it there, I sat down against the wall, leaning my head back.

"This is my spot."

"God!" My heart jumped and my eyes shot to the body sitting beside me. I breathed heavily, feeling my heart beating in my chest and I just focused on calming down. "Wanna warn a girl?"

"I was sitting right here when you walked up," he said in a rough voice.

I watched him blow smoke out of his mouth and I saw just the outline of the profile of his face. I could see that his nose was slightly crooked and there was some kind of small dent at his forehead, probably a scar.

I couldn't really see anything else in the dark, but he sounded handsome, so I stuck around.

"Maybe I'm a little buzzed," I told him, thinking it was true. I tapped my cig. "Jane."

He paused for a moment before he said, "Tim."

I nodded, looking up at the stars, definitely feeling the beer in my system then. "It's a beautiful night, Tim."

"Sure is."


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 3:

* * *

"Jane."

My eyes popped open, though they so badly wanted to be closed. "What?"

"My house…after school?"

I nodded, yawning. "Sure. For what?"

Pony laughed. "The project we're supposed to be working on."

"Oh, right." I nodded like I knew. "Your house after school. Got it."

"Soda said he met you last night at Bucks."

"Huh?" I asked, very interested then. "When?"

"Said you bumped into him."

I tried to think.

 _"Whoa!"_

 _I looked down at his shirt, some beer plastered over the front. "Oh, I'm sorry."_

 _He smiled and it looked like he wasn't trying to be charming or handsome...but he was. "That's alright."_

 _I stuck out my hand, almost having no control. "Jane King."_

 _"Jane." He shook it, smile still on his face. "Sodapop Curtis. My brother knows ya."_

 _I nodded. "Pony. Good kid."_

I looked at Pony - still a good kid. "Yeah, I kind of remember that."

"He also said, uh..." He looked down, a small smile making way to his face before it disappeared and then he covered his mouth. "Uh.."

My eyes narrowed, tilting my head back. "What?"

Pony's cheeks started to glow red. "You think I'm sharp?"

I reached over and smacked the back of his head just as the bell rang. I grabbed my books, Pony still teasing me about what I hadn't remembered saying, but probably said. He did that all the way to his house, right up until the moment we walked inside and sat down at his kitchen table.

"Jane King."

I turned in the chair in Pony's kitchen to see Sodapop Curtis. "Hi." I turned back around and I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"How you feelin' today?"

I looked back at him awkwardly. "Fine. Thanks."

He nodded, taking a big bite out of the sandwich he had in his hand and walked away.

My eyes slowly shifted back to Pony. "Nice guy."

Pony laughed, opening up his book.

* * *

"Hey." I greeted my brothers as I kicked the door closed.

"Hey."

"Hey, where were you?"

"Pony's."

"Who's that again?" David asked.

"Ponyboy Curtis. Just a friend from school."

"Curtis? I know his brother Darrell."

I raised my eyebrows. "Oh, cool."

"He's just a friend?" David asked, and both brothers stared at me from the couch.

I laughed, stopping to answer but laughing even more. "Yeah, he's just a friend. You guys are so funny." I took off my shoes, walking down the hallway and almost making it, but my mom called me.

"Jane! Jane, come here, please!"

I groaned, turning and going back into the kitchen. "Yeah, ma?"

"I need you to run to the store to get some milk."

I turned around. "I went yesterday."

"Jane," my mom said, looking desperate. "Please, go to the store."

I stepped back into the kitchen. "What's goin' on?"

My mom sighed. "Your father's going to be home soon and - and we can't pay - but we'll figure it out. It's just that your father will be a little upset, so I think you should go to the store."

I stepped forward and grabbed her hands. "I got a job. I can start working after school everyday and start payin' with you."

"No, no." My mom shook her head. "You won't have to do that, honey. You'll have homework and -"

"I'll get it done, ma. I know it's my fault and I wanna help."

"You can work, but you're saving the money for yourself."

I nodded hesitantly, knowing that I would figure out a way to sneak the money in there somehow. "Okay, ma." I nodded and walked out of the room, to the living and grabbed David's hand, dragging him to my room. "I need your help."

"What is it?"

I sighed. "I'm gonna start working more instead of only once a week and -"

"No," David said loudly and laughed. "No, I'm not helping sneak money into mom's money jar."

"David, please?" I pouted. "Please?"

David considered. "Fine, but I want you to put away half that you make for yourself, or else I'm not doin' it."

I smiled, punching his shoulder lovingly. "This is why you're my favourite."

"Hey!"

I groaned, opening the door to my room, causing Paul to come tumbling through it. "Paul!"

* * *

I grabbed the milk and started to walk to the register before someone appeared from one of the aisles, grabbing the carton of milk from my hand.

"Hey!"

Ray laughed, slipping an arm around me and continuing to walk to the register. "It's been a while, baby."

"You haven't called," I challenged him, knocking his arm off when we got to the register.

Ray set the milk down on the counter. "C'mon, Jane. Don't be like that."

I pulled money out of my pocket and put it on the counter. "Thanks."

The clerk nodded, pushing the milk closer to me.

I took and and turned, moving quickly out of the store. Ray followed behind me, taking the milk again.

"If you expect me to call, this won't work out," Ray joked.

I took it as an out.

I was done with Ray. A couple months ago, I could've gone on about how strong and handsome he was. I used to love his long, black hair - loving the way it flicked up at his shoulders. His eyes on me used to make me red, but not anymore. He stupid smile and tall stature didn't do much for me anymore, and I was finally done with all of his baggage, including a bunch of whores, no contact for weeks at a time, and being an asshole.

"Okay."

Ray chuckled. "What?"

"It's not gonna work out." I looked at him, grabbing my milk from his hands.

"What the hell'd you just say to me?" Ray stopped, but I continued walking. He grabbed my arm ton stop me. "What'd you just say?"

I rolled my eyes. "You heard me."

Ray scoffed, looking me in my eyes. "No one breaks up with me, Jane."

"Fine." I sighed, shifting my weight on my feet. "You can tell everyone that _you_ broke it off."

"But I didn't, and that's the funnest part."

"Then do it."

"What?"

"Break up with me."

Ray smiled slightly. "You're joking."

"Listen, Ray -" I started. "I've got to get home soon 'cause I've got shit to do, so can we hurry this up."

"Fine." Ray stomped his foot, looking me up and down. "Jane, I found someone else."

"Not surprised."

Ray ignored me. "And she's foxier than you, so I don't think we can see each other anymore." Ray slowly walked over to me and leaned in close to my face. "Unless you want to."

I laughed, leaning away. "Do people actually fall for that?"

Ray shrugged. "More than you'd expect."

"Alright, Ray." I nodded. "We're done now, so I'm gonna go."

Ray sighed, looping his thumb in his jeans. "Let me know if you're lonely, Jane."

"Will do," I said, turning the other way to my bike that was leaning against the wall, putting the milk in the basket and riding home.

* * *

I got back to the house a couple minutes too soon. I knew when I heard the yelling from inside, the yelling getting louder when I opened the door.

"Where is she?"

"I'm here."

Both my parents appeared in the living room, one worried and one angry. Guess which one's which.

"Jane!"

I felt the stinging a second later and I held my cheek, looking down at the ground. I raised my head bravely, looking him in his cold, dark eyes. "You're such a bastard."

"Jane!" my mom gasped.

He gripped the back of my hair and pushed my down to the floor. "What'd you just say?"

I kneeled uncomfortably. "I said that you're a no-good bastard with a drinking problem. Jesus, dad, you're so fucked up, I'm surprised you're still alive!"

He slapped me again, kicking my side and his heavy footsteps stomped passed me and I heard the door slam.

My mom rushed to my side. "Honey, are you okay?"

I could feel my eyes grow wet. "No."

"Oh, Jane, you-"

"Don't touch me." I stood up, pushing her away, feeling bad the instant I did it, but I didn't back down. "You never do anything to stop him. Why?"

"I..."

I ran to my room, only to sneak out the window. I wasn't gonna stick around that damn house any longer. I took my bike off of the side of the house and kicked off, sliding on the gravel clumsily before hitting the road.

I just pedalled for a while, a long while until I was riding past the Shepard's and a ton of people were hanging around outside, some music coming from somewhere deep in the house.

I stopped, throwing my bike to the side and running up the porch. I opened the door and it was exactly a type of party I'd expect to be at the Shepard's.

There were a lot of people rubbing shoulders and rubbing other things. Beer bottles were everywhere and music was playing. It was like a second Bucks.

"Jane!"

"Curly," I greeted, still looking around. "Quite a spread you've got here."

He put a heavy arm around me. "It's all Angela."

"Hey, hey, hey!" Some bigger guy grabbed the back of Curly's shirt and yanked him back, exposing his face to me. He looked just like Curly, but without the goofiness and with all the toughness. "What the hell is this?"

"I just invited some people over," Curly said quickly.

"Where the hell is Angela? I'm sure she's rilin' people up." The guy looked around his eyes landing on me. "Who are you?"

"This is Jane," Curly introduced.

"Yeah, I'm Jane," I said, knowing that voice.

"Tim." He nodded to me and a split second after I knew that he knew we had already done this. "This is my house and I want everyone out, Curly, _now_. Dad's comin' home in -"

Curly smirked and shook his head. "I don't know how to get all of these people out."

Awe. He thought there was a way out. I had a brother. Tim seemed like a David.

Tim took a step back, standing on the coffee table. "Alright! Everyone get the hell out of my house! Now! Go!"

He was exactly like a David.

Every person in the room didn't even glance up, and I could only assume they couldn't hear what Tim had just yelled. They continued to dance and laugh and kiss.

Curly laughed triumphantly. "Ha!"

Tim growled, reaching for Curly, who ran away before he could. When Tim realized there was no catching that curly-headed kid, he sighed and stepped down from the coffee table. "Shit."

"That's rough." I smiled, picking up a nearby beer. "Points for trying, though."

Tim looked over at me and his uneven nose pointed up as he crossed his arms. "Do I know you?"

I considered saying something and I decided that I didn't want to. "I don't think so."

He shrugged ever so slightly, uncrossing his arms and running his big hand over his greasy brown hair. "Alright, kid, I -"

"King," I said quickly, hating the other word.

"What?"

"King," I repeated, turning and starting toward the door, hearing his steps behind me over the loud music. "Not kid. Never kid."

"King as in the River Kings?" Tim asked once we were outside.

I nodded, my beer swinging at my side as we sat down on a bench on the Shepard porch. "You got a cig?"

He nodded, taking out a pack and shaking it, and then holding the cigarette out to my lips. I took the cig between my lips and waited for him to light it, glancing up at his content face. Once it was lit, I took a long drag, blowing the smoke into the dark night.

Tim lit a cigarette of his own. "How's your brother doin' these days?"

"Which one?"

"David."

I shrugged, tapping my cigarette. "He's alright. He's got a nice girl and a nice job. I'm sure he's workin' on a house." I looked over at him, watching his profile carefully. "You know 'im?"

"Everyone knows the River Kings."

My eyebrows rose at Tim. "Just like every knows the Shepard gang?"

He looked over at me, our eyes meeting. "Your folks know where you are?"

I smirked. "Tryna get rid of me?"

Tim merely scoffed. "Tryna get rid of everyone." He sighed, shaking his head. "Curly's such a pain in my ass."

"Can't be worse than Paul," I tried to offer, chuckling a little, looking over at him again, not being able to keep my eyes off of him. I didn't know what, but there was something about Tim Shepard that was fascinating. "How old are you these days, Tim?"

He just glanced at me. "Twenty."

I nodded, my brain not processing what I was doing when I leaned forward, putting my hand on the side of his surprisingly soft cheek and turning his face toward me. I leaned real damn close and pressed my lips against his gently.

Tim didn't even lean away - he actually had kissed me back for a second or two before he mumbled against my lips, "How old you are, kid?"

"King," I corrected, wrapping my arm around his shoulder and sliding into his lap. "And old enough."

* * *

"My sweater!"

My rolled over in the comfortable bed, covering my ears with the pillow.

"Tim! Where is my sweater?!"

"What sweater?"

"The pink one!"

"You have a million pink sweaters, Ang!"

My eyes opened wide, sitting up quickly and looking around the room - one I didn't recognize as my own. I looked down to see my bare chest and I yanked the covers around me quickly, unsure of what to do.

"Just help me find it!" a shrill voice yelled outside of the door. "Is it in your room?"

"Why would it be in my room?"

The door to the room I was in opened and a pretty brunette rushed in, barely glancing at me, rummaging through clothes on the ground, a couple of which were mine. She sighed heavily, looking up at me. "Have you seen a really cute pink sweater?"

I shook my head.

She rolled her eyes, stalking out of the room, leaving the door wide open, a clear view for anyone that walked by, including Curly.

"Jane, hey!"

I stared at him. "Hi."

He smirked, licking his lips and looking me over. "Tim won this round." He stared at me as he walked away.

"Curly!"

His head popped back in. "Yeah?"

"Could you close the door please?" I asked quite politely.

"What's in it for me?"

I groaned. "Curly, please."

"Alright, alright..." He closed the door.

I waited a couple of seconds to make sure it was legitimate before crawling out of bed and putting on my clothes from the night before. I looked in the mirror, smoothing my hair out as best I could and gathering any sense of dignity I had left to walk out of the room.

Tim was in the kitchen, newspaper in his hands, coffee in front of him. "Mornin'."

I sent him a nod. "Morning." I stood there awkwardly for a second, tapping my foot against the uneven floor and pulling my jacket tighter around me. "Well...seeya." I turned quickly, walking out of the Shepard household.

What the living hell had I done? We were just talking and then I went and kissed the guy. Don't get me wrong, I didn't regret it. It was nice. But I wish I had remembered more detail and had planned more carefully than I did.

Due to my nudeness when I woke up, we had obviously had sex. Tim didn't seem thrilled when he had seen me, though. Maybe it was one of those things that happened once and then no one spoke of it again.

Ray and I had been casual, but he always came back for something else.

I had no idea where Tim and I were at.

I tried not to think too much about it. I knew if I went home and hid in my room, that was all I was going to do, so I decided to ride out the time I had and I rode my bike over to the Curtis's.

I got there quickly, leaning my bike up against the side of the Curtis household. I walked up to the door and knocked.

Thankfully, Pony opened the door with a smile on his face. "Hey."

"Hey, I just came to ask if you wanted to hangout, maybe go to the movie house or somethin'."

"If it get's me out of calculus, I'm all for it."

I laughed, waiting for Pony to grab his jacket before we were off.

"Night of the Living Dead is playing, so we could -"

"Yeah, that sounds good."

"Hey, you okay?" Pony asked

I shrugged. "Uh, yeah, I'm good. It's just my asshole dad."

"Huh." Pony crossed his arms, looking at me like he usually did. "You never talk about your dad."

"Because he's an asshole."

Pony laughed lightly. "Really, though, Jane. What's he like?"

I sighed, moving forward in the line. "He's not home a whole lot. Him and my mom are still married, but I never see them together, and he's got an anger problem that goes with his drinking problem. How's that?" I glanced at him, catching his look of sympathy.

He continued to give me that look and he touched my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Jane."

Pony's parents were dead. I knew that. But when they were alive, they sounded like to coolest parents ever - not to mention loving, both things my parents weren't.

My mom could try to be loving, but ultimately failed. And my dad, do I even have to explain.

"It's chill," I said, smiling at him and nudging him. "I got my brother's and you." I felt uncomfortable saying it, but I felt the need to continue. "You're kind of my only friend, Pony, but you're the only one I need."

Pony blushed. "Thanks, Jane. You're one of the most interesting person that I've ever met, and it's a privilege to be your friend."

I rolled my eyes. "Now, don't get all mushy on me."

Pony laughed. "Sorry."

I laughed too. "Whatever. Let's just see this movie."


	4. Chapter 4

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 4:

* * *

When I got home, Paul was losing his mind.

"Where the hell were you?"

"Around town."

Paul rolled his eyes. "Before that, Jane."

"Still around town."

"Before that!"

"The Shepard's."

"The Shepard's?" Paul had stopped yelling, brows furrowed right at me. "What the hell were you doin' there?"

Tim Shepard. "Believe it or not, Curly's kind of a friend, so when he has a party, I go to it." I laughed, throwing my jacket somewhere and walking down the hall to my room. "Where's David?"

"He's at work," Paul said, following me to my room.

"Did he do anything to dad while I was gone?"

"Roughed him up a little." I could practically hear Paul smiling.

I entered my room, falling onto my bed and groaning loudly.

"What's with you?" Paul asked as I felt him lay down beside me.

"Nothin'," I said quickly, debating on whether to tell Paul the sugar-coated version of my night. "I just..."

"You just what?"

I sighed, looking up at my ceiling. "You know Tim Shepard?"

"Uh-huh."

"What's he like?"

"He's a real hood, that one."

I couldn't help but laugh. "What'd you mean?"

Paul put his hands behind his neck, his elbow hitting me in the head. "I heard he slashed a copper's tires right in front of 'em and still got away with it," he said, feeling the need to add, "And some say he's never lost a fight. He's real strict. That's why his gang's so tuff."

I nodded slowly, pushing him away slightly. "Huh."

"He gets a lot of chicks for some reason. Personally, I think he's a bore."

I chuckled, looking over at him. "What, you're not interested in him?"

Paul looked at me with disgust. "Shut up, Janey."

I pushed him, causing him to roll off of my bed. When I heard the loud thud on the ground, I looked over the edge at a disheveled Paul. "Get out of my room, Pauly."

He stood, shaking it off and raking a hand through his hair. "Why you so interested in Tim all the sudden?"

"I just saw him at the party last night and I was just wondering," I lied easily, falling back onto my back.

"Alright," Paul said, letting it go easily - not as I expected. He walked out of my door. "You want it closed?"

"What's with the nice act?" I asked.

"No act," Paul said, voice a little high, a signature that Paul was lying out his ass.

"Paul," I said sternly, sitting up.

Paul sighed, looking at me for a long second. "Mom says to go easy on ya."

"Now she cares."

"Hey, she cares," Paul said, taking on the stern tone I had before. He pointed a mean finger, taking a couple steps into my room. "She's only doin' her best."

"I know," I said loudly, cutting off anything else he was going to say. "I get it. Just get out, Paul."

Paul walked out, no more words from his smart mouth and he slammed my door.

I rolled over the width of my bed, opening up my window and almost crawling out.

No.

I sighed, walking over to my dresser and grabbing a cigarette.

Instead of sneaking out, I sat on my bed by my window and smoke a calming cigarette.

* * *

My dad didn't show the next day. Not in the morning and not after school, so, I didn't sweat it and I did my homework, then started to get ready for work.

I walked into the living room, realizing that riding that bike was the last thing I wanted to do. I stepped toward Paul, sitting around with all of his friends in the living room. "Hey, Paul, wanna give me a ride?"

"No," Paul said, not even looking at me.

I glared at the back of his head. "Paul."

"I'll drive you," Chip said, standing up.

My eyes widened, going back to my original decision. "I think I'll take my bike."

"What, why?"

Paul and Joey laughed and Chip still looked confused.

I hit Chip's shoulder, mostly to push him away from the door. "Because last time I took a ride from you, I got a giant bruise on my forehead and a scar for life."

Chip shook his head, placing his hands on his hips. "No, that wasn't my fault. I was -" He stopped, seeming to remember.

"Drunk?" I asked, laughing.

"I'm sober now."

"I don't know if you're any better sober, Chip."

Paul and Joey laughed again, making me wish I could stay and play cards rather than work.

I hadn't really realized, but I had really removed myself from everyone here, and I missed them.

Chip walked past me to the the door. "Do you want a ride or not?"

I figured if I died, at least I wouldn't have to go to work. "Yeah, I'll take it."

We got inside of his car that was barely together and we drove to the diner. Chip pulled up, one tire making its way onto the sidewalk - a place it should've never been.

"There you go, Janey."

I opened the car door, sliding out. "Thanks, Chip."

"Don't I get a kiss?"

I gave him a serious look. "No."

Chip shrugged, unaffected by my defiance. "Alright. Have a good day at work, Janey!" He sped off before I could say anything else.

I shook my head and smiled a little, and then I turned and walked inside the Dingo.

Curly was the first person I saw and the first one to say something to me. "Tell your boyfriend that he can't park there next time."

I walked past him, grabbing my apron of the way, making sure to bump his shoulder in the process. "He's not my boyfriend, just my brother's friend."

Curly smirked, nudging an innocent Ponyboy beside him. "Are we friends?"

I tied my apron, turning away. "No."

"Ah, come on, Janey, I've seen ya naked."

Pony choked on his soda. "Wha - what?"

I glared at Curly, my eyes slowly shifting toward Pony. "Curly and I have never gone to that place." I looked back at Curly, eyes narrowed. "We are never going to that place."

Curly shrugged, letting it go. "How 'bout a coke instead?"

I nodded. "Coming right up." I spun around, grabbing his drink easily and placing it in front of him, grabbing the coin from him. "What are you guys doing later?"

Pony shrugged his shoulders, tapping the counter. "We might head over to the movie house."

"Or we might get into Bucks."

I laughed at that. "You guys, get into Bucks? Good luck."

Curly smirked, pointing his slender finger. "Don't try and hide, Jane King. I've seen you in there before."

"I had an in," I said honestly, wiping the counter.

"Who was that?"

"Ray Tanner."

"That friggin' guy," Curly said, not sounding impressed. "He's an asshat."

I just continued to wipe the counter. "He's alright."

Pony looked at me, a face like he was trying not to chastise me. "He's not that great, Jane."

I smiled at him. "Thanks, Pony."

He smiled back. "No problem."

Curly let out a goofy laugh, looking past Pony and I at two guys fighting outside. "Looks at those two."

They were younger than we were, and they must've thought they were really cool.

"Jane!" my boss yelled at me. "Go cut that before the po show up."

I nodded, reluctantly walking outside and closer to the mini-rumble. "Hey!" I clapped my hands loudly, not gaining much attention.

"Back off, girlie," one of the boys told me.

I grabbed the back of the guys shirt, yanking him back. "Hey!" I yelled to the group, gaining all the attention. "Take this somewhere else, alright?" I let go of the kid, pushing him toward the street. "Come back when you turn thirteen."

The boys ran off, some glancing back and saying some mean things.

I smoothed out my uniform, walking back inside of the Dingo and sighing as I walked past my friends. "Well, there wasn't any blood."

"Shame," Curly said, still looking out the window.

* * *

I bobbed my head, glancing over at Pony and Curly every once in a while at the pool table in the dim red light. I turned back to the bar, twirling the nearly empty beer on the counter.

"Jane King."

I groaned, not wanting to talk to anyone, especially Ray. "Ray, I'm really not in the mood."

Ray laughed, leaning against the bar counter. "So, this is how you're doin' without me, huh?"

"No." I chuckled, leaning up and looking him in the eyes. "I've been working a lot, that's all."

"Okay, Jane." Ray smirked, sounding like he didn't believe me. "You're not losing sleep over me? Alright, sure."

I shook my head, more than sure. "I'm really not."

"Okay."

"I'm not."

"How about I buy you a beer?"

I nodded, liking that idea very much. "Okay."

"Two beers," Ray said to the bartender, and then gestured to the couch. "Which one?"

I looked over to see all the leggy blondes sprawled across the couch. "The one in the red top."

"Why her?"

"'Cause she looks like she'll slap you when you don't call her tomorrow."

Ray laughed, looking at me. "I _do_ love a challenge."

The beers appeared on the counter in front of us. Ray took his and I took mine.

"Do you want to join us?"

"I don't think I'll fit in." I put on a charming smile, walking past him to the separate room where Pony and Curly were getting their asses kicked in pool. "How's your guys's night?"

Pony sighed, standing back and leaning against the wall. "Not so -"

"Very good," Curly finished for him, leaning up after sinking one ball. "As you can see."

I nodded, trying not to laugh at him. "Uh-huh. It looks like you're doin' really well." I patted Pony's shoulder, sipping my new beer. "Alright, well, I need some air."

"Alright."

I walked out of the building, not expecting anyone or anything when I walked around the building to the back. What I did get was a couple making out. "Sorry," I apologized, looking away.

The girl pulled down her skirt quickly. "Whatever."

I looked around, finding a latter barely stuck to the wall and I climbed it quickly, wanting to get away from that awkward situation. I got tot he top of the ladder, managing to crawl onto the gravelled roof.

"This is my spot."

My heart jumped and my eyes shot up the the body hunched over the edge of the building. I stared at him in the darkness, walking closer. "Not every spot can be your spot."

His head whipped back to me, his greasy hair barely moving. "Jane?"

I couldn't help but to smile for some reason, sitting down beside him, making sure not to be too close. "The one and only." I sighed, placing the cold beer between my legs. "Don't you have friends?"

"They're too loud," he said, voice rough.

I hid my smile, taking a swig of my beer and then saying, "You seem to like the quiet, huh?"

"Uh-huh."

I nodded and stayed quiet, feeling that suddenly I was being super loud every time I opened my mouth to speak.

"You're sixteen?"

"What?" I asked him, thinking I had misheard.

Tim looked at me, holding his beer against his knee. "You're sixteen, right?"

I shrugged, looking away. "Well, almost seventeen."

"Jesus, kid."

"King," I said, not loving the direction of the conversation. I started to stand, ready to cut out.

Tim tugged on my jeans briefly. "Hey, sit down, King."

I sat back down beside him, looking out at this part of Tulsa. "Anybody else know about this spot?"

"Nah."

My foot bounced against the building as I said, "You've got it made, Tim Shepard."

Tim hummed. "Maybe."

We sat in silence for a good three minutes before I asked, "You got somethin' going on with anyone?"

Tim shook his head, but I caught the hesitation. "No." He threw his empty beer behind him. "You?"

I thought about Ray for a split second. "No." I sighed, placing my hands behind me and leaning back. "Will you be honest with me, Tim?"

"Always," Tim said lowly, maybe a little sarcastically.

"Am I good lay?"

He chuckled and I was sure that was the first time I had seen him smile. He turned to me, his teeth surprisingly straight and white. "Yeah, kid, you're a good lay."

I smirked, leaning over to his face and kissing him, to which he reciprocated with no hesitation.

* * *

When I got home later that night, I put out my cigarette, but didn't throw away my beer bottle. I walked inside the house, noticing that some lights were still on.

"I'm home," I sang through the house.

My mother appeared from the kitchen her face wrinkled with worry. "Jane, honey, where were you?"

I shrugged, not being able to come up with a decent lie. "Work."

"Speaking of which." My dad came around the corner. "Where's your paycheque?"

I hated this situation. I could see that he was angry already, but this time, I was the one who was drunk instead. No doubt, the night would end in someone bruised and battered. Spoiler alert, it was going to be me.

"I don't know," I mumbled, walking to the hallway.

"Jane." My dad caught my arm. "Where is it? Your mother and I need the money."

I smacked his hand away. "I -"

He slapped me like it was as easy and natural as blinking. "Do not give me attitude, Jane.'

"Sorry, _dad,_ " I said, turning to walk down the hallway again.

"You're drunk," he pointed, placing his huge hand on my back and pushing me harshly.

I fell down onto my knees, scraping them on the old wood. My beer bottle fell out of my hands and rolled away from me and I said in a delayed reaction, "Ow."

His foot landed on my side, pushing me onto my back. "Where's the money?"

"It's already in the money jar."

"All of it, Jane." he said, fire in his eyes dark eyes. "Not half; all."

I shook my head. "No, that money's for me."

He kicked my side. "Where is it?" he growled viscously.

"Richard, please," my mom begged from behind him.

He turned to my mom for a second. "We need the money, Nancy."

"It's her money, Richard. We can't take it from her."

"Why are you talking back?" He started toward her, giving me time to stand up.

I almost started running the other way, just like I always had done, but I turned back for a split second to see my father walking toward my mom. Her body trembled and she held her hands tightly together, her body ready for whatever he was going to do.

She never stuck up for me because she was scared of him too.

I reached down and grabbed the beer bottle from the ground, holding it up and smashing it over his big head. My mother gasped as he fell onto the ground, unconscious. I let what was left of the bottle slide out of my hand as I looked at her and breathed out a heavy breath. "Goodnight." I turned around and walked to my room, sitting on the bed and staring at the floor.

Never had I ever fought back, let alone smashed a bottle over his head.

I felt my body start to shake as I sat on the edge of my bed. I covered my face with my bloodied hands, covered in cuts from the bottle and slivers from the floor.

The door to my room opened and I straightened immediately.

"Oh, Jane."

I looked up at Paul. "I'm sorry."

Paul walked over to me and sat beside me on my bed, taking my shoulders to make me face him. He set his wet cloth in his lap and took my hands in his, picking out the slivers. "Damnit, Jane."

"I said I was sorry."

"You put yourself in these places," Paul said sternly.

"I know," I said back. "Where's David?"

Paul was silent for a minute. "He's at Molly's, but he'll be home in the morning."

I nodded. "Ah." I breathed in, feeling Paul taking out the last sliver roughly.

"Sorry."

"No, you're not."

Paul picked up his wet cloth and rubbed my hands gently. "I hate seeing this happen to you, Janey, but you need to stop coming home late, drunk and smelling like smoke. You need to stop being a smart ass, and just give dad what he wants."

"That's your tactic because you're scared," I retaliated stupidly.

Paul gave me a hard look. "That's my tactic because I don't want to get the life beaten out of me every other day. If I do, I don't get a whippin' for stupid shit like this."

"I'm not gonna give him what he wants."

"Good luck with that," Paul said, moving on to wiping my face.

"Ow, Paul," I hissed as he rubbed the spot on my cheek, where there was surely a bruise.

"Sit still, Jane."

"I am."

"Alright," Paul huffed, moving away from me and looking me over. "You're good."

"Thanks." I moved over, so I was closest to the wall and I laid down, closing my eyes. I waited, quickly growing tired of the fact that the lights were still on. "Shut off the light, you ditz."

"Chill out, Janey. I'm gettin' to it."

Paul's weight left the bed and the lights turned off a second later, Paul's weight returning.

"You know, you have your own bed, Paul."

I heard Paul sigh loudly. "I know."

I sighed too. "Goodnight, Pauly."

"'Night, Janey."


	5. Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 5:

* * *

Like Paul said, David was home for breakfast. But what I didn't expect was for breakfast to be awkward.

"Pass the juice," I demanded softly, reaching out for it.

Paul and David looked at each other before David reached out and grabbed the orange juice, passing it to me silently.

"Thanks," I said suspiciously, before I finally broke. "What the hell is goin' on?"

Paul stuffed food into his mouth. "How'd you mean, Janey?"

I scoffed, leaning back in my chair. "Why are sitting down and having breakfast? Where is mom? Where is dad? Why are you guys bein' so... _weird_?"

David visibly swallowed. "Dad's gonna take a trip."

"What?" I choked on my food, the news new and exciting. "A trip?"

David nodded. "Yes, Jane. A trip."

"Where? For how long? What're you talkin' about?"

"A couple weeks," Paul answered simply.

I looked at him. "Paul?"

Paul tried not to look at me. "What?"

"Paul," I said sternly.

Paul sighed. "Since dad's gone, David -"

"I found a house."

My mouth fell open and I was frozen. "A house...for you?"

"Yeah." David had a small, happy smile on his lips. "Molly really likes it. It feels like home."

"This is your home," I said without thinking.

At that moment, I couldn't take in David's happiness - only the fact that he was going to be gone.

David's smile dropped, staring at me intently. "And it always will be, Jane, but -" He reached out for my hand, but I yanked it away and stood.

"You're gonna leave me here with the asshole and that dip-shit?"

Paul stood. "Watch it, Jane."

"Bite me, Paul."

"Sit down," Paul tried to command me, grabbing my arm.

"No," I growled, ripping my arm away from his grasp and taking a couple steps back, looking at David. "As soon as dad leaves, you find an out."

David stood, trying to take my shoulder in his strong grip. "Jane -"

"Stop." I started to walk out of the room and into the living room, too upset to think rationally.

"Jane!"

"Stop." Paul stopped David, then nodded to me. "Where you goin'?"

"Out."

"Jane."

"Out!" I yelled, storming out of the house.

I went straight for the Curtis household, hoping for the best. And the best was there, sitting on the porch with a Chemistry textbook in his lap.

"Hey," he said once he saw me, moving over so that I could sit down. "What're you doing here?"

I sat down beside him, my knee bumping his. "You have a cigarette?"

Pony shook his head. "I'm tryin' to quit." He flipped a page of his book. "Told Darry I'd try. And the track meet isn't that far away, so..."

I chuckled. "You're such a nerd."

Pony gave me a playful look. "You come to my house, bully me -"

I bumped my shoulder against his, my smile fading quickly. "David's finally moving out." I sighed, looking down at the ground. "I'm gonna be left in a house with my parents and Paul. The only one I like is leaving."

Pony sighed lightly, his arm coming around my mid-back, his hand holding onto my shoulder. "I'm sorry, Jane."

I leaned my head against him. "Thanks, Pony." I turned my jaw and ran my teeth over each other, trying so hard not to cry as my face turned red and my eyes glossed. "I don't know what to do."

"You have me," Pony offered lightly, seeming unsure of whether that was something he should say.

I started to smile, leaning up for a second to wrap my arm around him. "Don't say dumb shit like that."

Pony laughed. "Got it."

* * *

I didn't go home - the opposite actually.

I sat up in the bed. "Can you pass me my shirt?"

Tim walked to the end of the bed, leaning down and grabbing my shirt, tossing it over to me. "Pants."

I reached down to the ground, picking up his jeans and throwing them over to him. "There you go."

"Thanks."

I stood, pulling my shirt over my head. "No problem."

"Tim!"

Tim groaned, barely being able to do up his jean zipper before the door burst opened. He rushed over, shutting it closed before it opened too much. "What do you want, Curly?"

"I'm goin' out, alright?"

"Uh-huh."

"Who's in there?"

Tim glanced over his shoulder at me. "No one."

"Oh, alright," Curly said and I could practically hear the snicker in his voice. "Well, I'll be back for dinner. You know what ma's cookin'?"

"No idea."

"Alright."

"Alright," Tim replied, moving away from the door and walking toward a dresser to get a shirt.

I watched his muscular back, doing up jeans of my own. "You're kind of the head of the house, hey?"

Tim pulled a white shirt out, sliding it on and looking at me. "I guess so."

"You don't wanna go to school?" I asked him, working on putting on my shoes.

"I don't have the time," Tim said, grabbing his leather jacket. "Or money," he added on quietly in the rough voice that got me in the kind of naked situations to begin with.

"Did you ever want to?" I asked another semi-annoying question, tying my shoe laces.

"Maybe once," Tim said, using a tone he had only used one other time when asking how old I was. He always sounded serious, but it was a different kind. It was strange, yet comforting. "But I got a lot of shit to do."

I nodded and stood, grabbing my jacket, nodding to his jacket. "Walkin' me out?" I smirked.

Tim looked like he was trying his best not to smile. "Don't flatter yourself, kid." He walked toward the door, holding it open. "Come on."

I walked out his bedroom door and past Angela in the living room.

"Jane, right?"

I stopped and looked at her. "Uh-huh."

She nodded, giving me a once over before looking down at her nails. "Nice shirt."

I looked down and noticed my obviously backwards shirt. "Oh, shit." I took my arms out, twisting the shirt around to the front.

"Classy," Angela commented.

Tim's hand touched my back and I realized in all the ways he had touched me, he had never touched me like that; so casual and simple. "Cut it out, Ang," he said, encouraging me toward the door. "I'm goin' out. Get that homework done, hey?"

"Uh-huh."

I walked out the door, jogging down the steps. "She's quite the girl."

"She means well," Tim said, pulling out his pack of cigarette. "Want one?"

I almost said yes, but I remembered what Pony had said earlier that day and I was still a little inspired. "No. I'm tryin' to quit."

Tim's eyebrows rose and he put the pack back in his pocket. "Alright then."

I smiled. "You should try it."

"I'm not doin' that," he said, lighting the cig between his nice lips.

I laughed to myself. "I didn't think so."

"Yo, Shep!"

Tim and I looked up.

It was Ray Tanner and a couple of his scary-looking buddies. They walked together, all of them walking with heavy feet, seeming to be on some sort of mission.

"What the hell are they doin' here?" Tim asked, walking up right next to me to get a better look. "This isn't their turf."

I shook my head. "The Tiber Street Tigers do whatever they want."

Tim took his cigarette between his long fingers. "Well, so do I." He walked forward, walking with power that he knew he had. He walked like he was going to kick your ass before you even knew there was a fight, and I could see some of the Ray's men falter slightly.

Ray walked quickly, standing in front of Tim within a couple of seconds, only a couple feet from me. "What's goin' on, Shepard?"

"What're you doing here, Ray?"

Ray eyes shifted to me and he laughed, walking around Tim with his arms out. "Janey, baby!"

I scoffed, pushing him away before he could get too close. "Don't."

Ray smirked, now turning to Tim. "You screwin' around with Jane?"

"What's it to you?" was Tim's reply.

Ray shrugged greatly, stuffing his hands in my pocket. "I just didn't know you loved sloppy seconds so much."

I stepped in front of Tim, who advanced quickly and angrily. "Hey," I said softly, pushing him back.

Tim's snarl was still on his face when he shook me off.

I didn't know if it was the suggestion that Tim was second best, but he seemed pretty damn pissed.

I sighed, turning toward Ray. "Get out of here, Ray."

He kept his stupid smirk. "Why, babe -"

I brought my arm back, my fist connecting with his face not a second later. My hand throbbed soon after and I shook it harshly as I cringed. "Shit."

"Shit!" Ray yelled over, holding his nose. "You broke my damn nose!" he said, pulling his hand away from his nose for a second to reveal the dripping blood.

Someone's body knocked into mine - not Ray's - one of his guys, though. "Bitch!"

I groaned when I hit the ground, but the man wasn't over me for long. Tim's body barrelled into the man's, knocking him down as they rolled in the dirt. I quickly stood, jumping onto a guy who looked a little too close to Tim.

I pulled his greasy hair back before it slipped through my fingers and he was down on the ground. I kicked him at his side, my legs being swatted at. I fell down, ass first - ouch, by the way, and the guy crawled over my, hitting me in the face.

"Enough!" Ray yelled loudly, wiping his nose on his shirt. "Let's cut out."

Tim stood, spitting blood onto the ground. "Don't let me see you back here again."

Ray chuckled, turning to walk away, but not before saying, "Sure, Shepard."

Tim walked over to me, holding his hand out. "You good?"

I grabbing his hand graciously, standing on my feet and brushing myself off. I sighed, touching my lip and then looking down at my fingers. Blood. Great. I sighed, wiping the blood on my jeans. "Great."

"Here -" Tim put both of his hands on the sides of my face, his thumb running over my lip - another way he had never touched me.

It was crazy how the most intimate moments were when you weren't having sex.

"There." Tim moved away, wiping the blood from my lip on his own jeans. "You're good."

"Yeah?" I asked, pushing my hair from my face.

"Yeah," he confirmed.

I looked his handsome face over before backing away slowly. "Thanks, Tim."

"No problem."

I smiled lightly. "I'll see you around?"

Tim waved briefly, getting a new cigarette. "See you around, kid."

* * *

I walked into the house, head down.

"Hey, Janey."

I walked past Paul to go to my room, but someone's tight grip caught be by the arm. I sighed, turning toward my oldest brother. "What?"

"We should talk about it," David said to me and I raised my head to speak, quickly being cutoff by by him grabbing my face and turning it, getting a good look. "What in the hell -"

I smacked his hand away. "I got in a fight," I said, feeling the burning on my lips when I spoke. My face ached and I wasn't feeling all to well. "Can I go now?"

"With who?" David prompted, a stern look on his face.

"No one important," I said, shaking my head. "It was just one of those things that happened for no reason."

"Everyone has a reason."

"Why do you care?" I asked, walking around him to the kitchen. "I'm not your problem anymore."

David groaned behind me. "As long as I'm your brother, you're my problem, Jane. It doesn't matter if I don't live here no more. I still care."

"Whatever." I grabbed a coke from the fridge, opening it as I walked past him again.

He grabbed my arm again, voice rising with every motion. "Jane -"

"What?" I said loudly, looking at him angrily.

"Stop!" Paul stood, finally opening his big mouth, though he looked more serious than I had ever seen him. "Stop yelling at each other," he grumbled, walking past both of us and going to his room, slamming the door.

I sighed, shaking David off and running to Paul's room, not knocking as I walked inside. "Paul."

He was standing not far from me, running a hand through his hair. "You two are so damn loud."

David appeared beside me, walking past me to get closer to Paul. "I'm sorry, man."

Paul looked between the two of us, eyes settling on me. "David's gonna move out, Jane, and there's not a damn thing we can do about it. He's gotta move on." And then he looked at David. "But don't forget about us, uh? We're still gonna need you over here."

Never had I seen Paul put something back together. He was usually the one doing the breaking, but not that time. He was the middle ground between his two hot-headed siblings. I had just never realized it before.

I moved closer to Paul, putting my arm around him and then one around Paul. "We're still a family, right?"

David nodded, putting his arm around both of us. "Someone's gotta take care of you two hooligans."

"Hooligan?" Paul asked, pretending to be offended. "Me?"

David and I just laughed.

"Kids?" my mother was yelling into the house.

The three of us walked into the living room, helping her with the grocery bags. Be it like her to do everything at once. We had set all the groceries down on the table and my mom order David and Paul to get the rest of the groceries.

"Jane," my mom said to me, taking out the groceries. "Could you help, please?" I started to pull out a bunch of stuff, handing it to her in an organized manner. Everything was going really well until my mom held out a pack of cigarettes to me. "Here. I bought these for you."

She never did that, and I assumed it was a pity present. It must've been her form of an apology for not doing shit all when I was getting my ass kicked.

I looked down at the cigarettes and then continued unpacking. "I'm trying not to smoke, mom."

"Oh," she said, recoiling the pack slowly. "Very good."

I nodded, offering up a smile. "Uh-huh."

"Do you want to tell me what happened to your face?" she asked, taking some fruit from my hands.

I sighed, gently touching my cheek that was probably bruised. "I got into a fight."

"How's the other guy look?"

I smirked, her new questions reminding me of older, better times with my mom. "Rough."

She laughed lightly, almost like she was trying not to. "Do I want to know _why_ there was a fight?"

"No," I said simply. "It's not a problem anymore."

David and Paul walked into the house, chuckling about something only boys would find funny as they sat the bags down on the table.

That was my family, and it felt like a _real_ one.

* * *

An entire two weeks of spending too much time with Pony made me feel inclined to go to the movies with Paul, which I soon regretted.

Paul walked out of the movie house, laughing loudly. "And - and that part when he was like, 'you asshole!' - did you see that part?"

"I was there and watching to movie, so, yeah, I saw that part."

Paul sighed happily, his arm coming around me. "I had fun, Janey." He sighed. "I know it's not what you wanted to do for your birthday, but family is sacrifice, right?"

I was seventeen that day. I didn't feel different. I barely even acknowledged it. I hated birthdays.

"I wish David could've come," I said honestly.

"Ah, you know he's busy gettin' all his shit together."

I nodded. "Yeah, well, he's moving really soon."

"Is it next week? I always forget."

"Yeah, it's next week."

Paul nodded, arm sliding off of me as he turned to me, smacking my face lightly. "That bruise is lookin' better."

I rubbed the spot of the faded bruise. "Yeah, I guess."

"Hey, Jane?"

"Yeah?" I said, looking far down the street.

"Where the hell were you all night last night?" he asked me, glancing down at me, brows furrowed. "I heard you climb through the window at three."

I had been at the Shepard household, and not to party with Curly.

I opened my mouth to answer, but I couldn't help but to think back on the days within the last week or two.

 _"Well, what the hell?" I said, groaning out of frustration._

 _Tim grabbed my cue that was still in my hands and adjusted it. "You just gotta change your grip."_

 _I heard him over the loud music and I looked at him in the red light of Bucks. "How much money are we in this for again?"_

 _Tim chuckled, walking around me, giving me a pat on the butt. "Too much, kid."_

That was a friendly game of pool that I had lost very terribly. Tim hadn't let up and let me win - no, no - he crushed me at that game and gladly took the money I had in my pocket.

Later that night, we went back to his place and 'hashed' things out, but that was the first time Tim started to be my friend.

But there were other times too - ones I enjoyed.

 _"I'm tryin' to quit, remember?"_

 _Tim nodded, putting the pack back in his pocket. "Ah, that's right. Takin' the high road."_

 _I laughed, continuing to walk alongside him on the street. "I heard somethin' about cigarettes shortening your life."_

 _"That's what I'm goin' for."_

 _I laughed again, shaking my head. "Tim, maybe it's worth a shot."_

 _Tim scoffed. "With a sister like Angela? What, a brother like Curly? You expect me to not have some sort of relief?"_

 _"There are other ways to relieve yourself," I said quickly, not realizing how sexual I had sounded in that moment. "I mean -"_

 _Tim just laughed a beautiful laugh, heading toward the Mini-Mart. "Come on. I need some drinks."_

 _"Alright," I said easily, walking inside and helping him carry some of his stuff._

 _Tim was walking by the candy aisle, already having the things he needed. He grabbed something off the display, stuffing it into his pocket._

 _"Tim!" I whisper-yelled in shock, laughing a little, though I shouldn't have found it funny._

 _Tim smirked at me - something he had never done. "You didn't see a thing, kid."_

 _I smiled, watching his behind all the way up to the counter._

Tim and I started to hang out around the times were were doing much more than that. We were going to Bucks together, walking around town, hanging around his living room and watching TV. Sometimes we hung out and didn't even have sex later on.

And then that one strange thing happened.

 _I pulled my jacket on, grabbing my toothbrush that I had left from the night before. "Alright. I'll see you after work."_

 _Tim nodded, following me to his front door. "You really wanna hang around the Dingo even after work?"_

 _I nodded surely. "Definitely." I smiled, turning to face him and leaning against the door. "I can get us free burgers."_

 _Tim smile, but just barely. "I'm in."_

 _I leaned closer, subconsciously kissing him as my hand found the doorknob. I leaned away from him, confused by myself._

 _We didn't kiss goodbye. That wasn't our thing. Kissing wasn't our thing - especially not kisses goodbye. It was too romantic - too...couple-like, and a couple we were not._

 _Tim swallowed, taking a step back. "Uh, so I'll see you later."_

 _I nodded, turning the knob and opening the door. "Uh-huh."_

 _"Alright." He nodded. "Seeya, kid."_

 _"Seeya," I said quickly, closing the door behind me and jogging down the familiar steps, running toward my bike and getting on it quickly._

 _My heart was thumbing and we face felt hot and I didn't enjoy it._ _The kiss, though, I did._

There was some weird transition neither of us were really away of where we started to kiss each other after leaving each other, but that was where that ended. We kissed while we were in his bed and when I was leaving, but no other times.

"Jane?"

I looked up at Paul. "Oh, I was out with Amy."

Amy and I hung out on occasion, but rare ones.

"That's bullshit."

I sighed, studying Paul for a second. "Can I tell ya somethin'?"

Paul smirked. "You know I'm gonna say yes even though you can't."

I looked forward, not wanting to see his reaction. "I kind of have this thing with Tim Shepard."

"Tim Shepard?" I couldn't see Paul's face, but he _sounded_ shocked. "Timothy Shepard, as in Tim Shepard from the Shepard gang?"

"No, the other Tim Shepard," I said to him, finally glancing at his surprised face.

His surprised face turned to an angry one. "I'm not messin' around here, Jane. Why do you always go for the guys that are too old for you?" Paul sighed, shaking his head. "And the hood ones too. Ray and now Tim..."

I shrugged, hands in my pockets. "I don't know. I just like 'em."

"You and Tim are together?"

I was surprised by his sudden calmness and I looked him in the eyes. "No."

Paul sighed, and I could see the snarky comment he was holding in. "Alright."

"I'm impressed." I smiled, bumping my body against his. "You kind of remind me of -"

"David? Yeah, I'm givin' it a shot," Paul said to me, taking out a cigarette. "But it's a long one."


	6. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 6:

* * *

"...And so, of course, I was like - Jane? Jane, are you even listening?"

My eyes shifted from the window to Amy's face. "Huh?"

She gave me a look - one I had been receiving all day from her. "Are you listening to me?"

"Sure," I answered.

"What did I just say?"

I sighed. "Something about your sister?"

"My ex-boyfriend's sister!" Amy said dramatically, rolling her eyes at me.

I rolled my eyes back, feeling exhausted from the prolonged conversation as I shifted in my seat. "Well, I don't know."

"She's been callin' me a whore."

My brows furrowed at her. "Okay?"

Her eyes widened and her mouth dropped. "Do you think I am one?"

"No!" I defended myself, not understanding where she was getting that from.

She smiled. "Good. 'Cause I'm not." She sighed, flipping her hair over her shoulder and glanced out the window of the Dingo at all the boys out front. "Jimmy Tate is out there. We kind of have a thing."

"Cool."

"Can I ask you a question? And give me an honest answer."

"Uh-huh," I said, just sipping my milkshake.

She looked out at the unimpressive Jimmy, smiling at him. "You think he'd leave girlfriend for me?"

I looked out at Jimmy, confused as to why anyone would want to be his girlfriend, let alone Amy. From what I heard, he was in love with his girl. "No."

"What?"

I looked back at Amy, who looked shocked. "What?"

Her face turned angry. "You callin' me ugly?"

I squinted my eyes at her. Was she for real? "What?"

She wrapped her slim fingers around her coke and tossed the drink at me, drenching me in it. "Bitch!"

I gasped and by the time I opened my eyes, she was gone. I wiped my eyes, the burning fading slowly the more I blinked. I grabbed a lot of napkins, wiping my face.

"Whoa."

I looked up at Curly, Tim and Pony. "How was I to know that when someone tells you to give them an honest answer, you're actually supposed to lie?"

Tim chuckled, grabbing a napkin and taking my chin roughly, wiping the rest of my face. "Everyone knows that."

I looked up at Pony, careful not to move my face. "Does everyone know that?"

Pony shrugged, like he was trying to soften the blow. "Not every -"

" _Everyone_ ," Curly said, grinning at me. "Or at least any guy whose had a girlfriend or any girl who's had a any friend ever."

I smacked Tim's hand away, glaring lightly. "My only friends growing up were my brothers, and they were too ugly to get any girls. Paul was, anyway."

Tim scrunched the napkin in his hand, tossing it aside. "Well, you learned your damn lesson. We were gonna eat. Want somethin'?"

I sighed, shaking my head. "No, I better get home." I subconsciously reached for my wet hair as I stood.

"You look fine," Pony reassured me.

I smiled lightly, leaning forward and kissing his cheek. "Thank you."

Curly stuck his face out, leaning his cheek toward me, earning a slap on the back of the head from Tim.

I just laughed, waving good by and bouncing out. I was walking down the street, hands in my pockets, when the laces on one of my shoes came untied.

"Damnit," I cursed to myself, getting tired of the repeated annoyance.

"It sure is a view from here."

I tensed, turning around to see the Tiber Street Tigers, all of them with the exception of Ray. "Ray let you guys off of your leashes?"

Brent, the biggest one, the second-in-command snarled, stepping closer to me. "You're lucky you're off limits, King. For now, at least."

I sighed, already bored. "What are you talking about?"

He smirked an ugly and evil smirk. "Ray wants his turf back."

"It wasn't his to begin with," I snapped.

"It always was and now he wants it back. We were just headed over to your place to tell your brother."

"Tell him what?"

"Rumble. River Kings versus Tiber Street Tigers."

My breath got caught it my throat. "Skins?"

He continued to smirk and his dark eyes glowered on me. "We'll see."

I shook my head. "It's stupid."

"You're stupid."

"Nice comeback."

"What'd you say, bitch?" Brent pushed my shoulders.

I stumbled on my laces, only making me angrier. The spit moved around my mouth and I debated it for a long second before I spat in his face and started to run. Brent's yelling only encouraged me further and I ran as fast as I could.

And then I tripped on my untied laces.

I hit the ground hard, grunting, and I writhed for a second too long.

Brent's hand grabbed my arm, flipping me onto my back and his fist connected with my face. "You want a taste, huh, King?"

I reached out to fight him back, but the gleam of a blade made me stop.

It came down on my cheek, making a large cut against it.

I screamed loudly, hitting him anywhere and as hard as I could. "Stop!" I hit him again and again until he wasn't there. I opened my eyes and looked around, catching the Tigers running away. My head hit the dirt again and I sighed.

My face hurt.

I tried not to pay attention to my throbbing jaw and instead turned my attention to the blood coming from the cut. I wiped it on the sleeve on my jacket and stood. I continued my way home, wiping more and more blood away everyone once in a while.

When I got home, I noticed the absence of David's truck. "Did he already go?" I asked as I walked through the doorway, but Paul wasn't on the couch. "Paul?" I called through the house, not getting a response. I moved through the kitchen. "Ma?"

No one was home.

I went right to the bathroom, trying my best to clean myself up.

* * *

Night rolled around and still no sign of any of my family, and so I was off. I swung by the Curtis's to picky up Pony and then we were on our way to Bucks. In that moment, I couldn't have been more thankful for the awful, red and dim lighting of Bucks to hide my face.

I walked inside, sitting down at the bar with Pony and looking around for Curly. "You see 'im?"

"No."

My eyes landed on one person I was a little surprised to see and I pushed myself off the counter, glancing at Pony. "I'll be right back." I walked across the red room, over to the couch and stopped in front of him. "Have you been here all day?"

Paul looked up at me, not smiling or laughing. "Pretty much."

I nodded toward the corner. "Come here."

He stood, walking over to the corner of the room where it was quieter. "What?"

"Did Ray find you?"

Paul sighed. "Yeah."

"What'd he say?"

"Wait, how'd you know?" He squinted his eyes, really studying my face in the darkness. "Jesus, Jane." He grabbed my chin, pulling my face both ways, looking at the bruises and the cut. "Those assholes."

I pushed his hand away. "What did Ray and his gang say to you?"

Paul glanced around and leaned in close. "He wants to rumble in three weeks."

"Skins?" Paul glanced around nervously and I hit his arm. "Paul!"

"He wanted weapons and I didn't wanna look like a pans, alright?" Paul said angrily to me.

I sighed, rubbing my face. "Well, is it single gangs?"

"No, we can team up."

"Who you choosin'?"

Paul then started to smile. "That Curtis gang _and_ the Shepard gang owe me big time."

The two gangs that I might've actually wanted to sit this one out.

"Did you ask 'em?" I said eagerly.

Paul nodded. "Daryl Curtis is in, and Tim said he'd do it."

My brows furrowed at him, crossing my arms. "When did you ask?"

"I asked Curtis earlier today and Shep just now."

"Tim is here?"

"Yeah, right over -"

I followed Paul's finger, seeing Tim through the doorway, arm around a pretty blonde and her arms around him. The girl was pulling his face toward her and kissing him every couple of seconds and they were making out soon after. When they broke apart, the girl laughed and moved away from Tim to play some pool.

Amy.

"Jane? You alright?" Paul looked where I was looking, seeing not what I had seen - just Tim with a beer in his hand, laughing at something with his buddies. He looked back at me and grabbed my arms. "Hey, what's wrong?"

I looked him in the eyes, only now noticing that he was blurry. I blinked, quickly wiping the tears that fell over my eyes, very embarrassed. "Nothing." I pushed him away, making a second of eye contact with Pony before walking out of Bucks.

"Jane!" Pony ran up beside a couple of seconds after I left. "What happened?"

"Janey!" Paul did the same, grabbing my arm. "What the hell happened?"

"I don't know!" I yelled, just frustrated. "I don't know, I just - Tim was -"

"What did he do?" Paul asked, hand still wrapped around my arm.

"It doesn't matter. We're not together."

"Oh." Pony's disappointed tone made me think that he had seen what happened. "Are you talking about Tim making out with Amy?"

My heart quickened at the words and I shook Paul off of me. "Yes."

"That son of a bitch."

"Enough, Paul!" I screamed, stopped walking and turned to face them. "I just want to forget about this whole thing, alright? I want to pretend this night never happened." I sighed, stuffing my hands in my pockets. "You guys go back to Bucks and have a good time. I'm gonna head home." I put my head down, feeling my face heat up as my eyes felt wet again.

"Jane," Paul said softly, stepping closer to me.

I wrapped my arms around him, hugging him tightly and crying softly.

After getting jumped and watching the guy I liked way too much make out with a "friend" that threw a drink in my face, I decided that it wasn't my day and I was allowed to cry about it.

Paul rubbed my back and hugged me back just as tightly. "Hey, toughen up, sis. You don't need the guy." He grabbed my shoulders, pushing me away to look me in the eyes. "If you cry again, I'll beat you up."

I nodded, even smiling a little. "Okay."

Paul rubbed my hair and then looked at Pony. "Take my sister home, won't you?"

Pony nodded, walking toward me and walking alongside me. He put a comforting arm around me, softly saying, "It's gonna be okay, Jane."

I nodded, my head against his shoulder. "Okay."

Pony sighed. "You can cry in front of me."

I nodded again, a couple tears sliding down my cheeks.

* * *

I blew the smoke out of my mouth carefully, facing away from Pony laying down beside me.

The sun rose from last night and Pony and I had watched it. We had stayed up all night on my porch just because I didn't want to sleep. Pony eventually had succumbed to his tiredness and I was left to smoke a cigarette alone.

I hadn't smoke a cigarette in a long while and I damn well needed one then.

The cigarette was wonderful and the sunrise was beautiful, and Pony's snores beside me were surprisingly calming.

My head snapped the the alleyway when I heard footsteps and Ray emerged a second later. I glanced down at a deep-in-sleep Pony before getting off the porch and walking over to Ray. "What're you doin' here?"

Ray reached out, rubbing his thumb over my cheek. "Sorry 'bout that, baby."

I took a step back from his touch. "It's fine."

"I didn't order it."

"I know."

Ray looked at me in a way he never had and then he sighed. "Your brother home?"

"No."

"Want to invite me inside?"

"No."

"You still with Shepard?"

"No."

"You know how to say anything else?"

I glared. "No."

Ray laughed, shifting of his feet. "You always were pretty straight forward, Jane."

I looked him in the eyes, wondering how at one point I had found him to be the only thing I really cared about. "Uh-huh."

"You want to go out tomorrow?"

"No," I said surely.

"Why not?"

I gave him on obvious look. "You and my brother are gonna kill each other on Saturday and you think goin' out is a good idea?"

"Didn't bother you before." Ray smirked.

"You guys weren't fighting before, you just hated each other," I argued back.

"Oh, come on, Jane," Ray said sickeningly sweet, reaching out for my waist. "We were so good together. Why aren't you my chick?"

I moved away from him again. "I'm not that way anymore."

His grabby hand fell away from me. "You really like Shepard, don't you?" I didn't answer. "You love him?"

"It's none of your damn business how I feel about anyone."

"Did you ever love me?" Ray asked suddenly, staring at me with as much intensity I had ever seen him have. "Did you ever think that you wanted to be with me forever?"

I hesitated before nodding. "Yeah, I think I loved you for a minute there," I said honestly, looking up at him. "You were the best thing to ever happen to me for a little bit."

Ray didn't talk for a long second before he said, "And that can never happen again?"

"Never," I confirmed. Ray nodded, turning to walk away. "Wait," I called quietly, watching him turn. "You ever love me?"

Ray smirked. "If I did, I wouldn't tell you."

I shook my head. "If you did, you wouldn't want to hurt me."

Ray shrugged, backing away into the alley. "We hurt the people we love, Jane."


	7. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 7:

* * *

I walked around the tiny little house. "Wow," I marvelled, very impressed by the progress made within the week. "It's really nice."

David smile widely, a glow on his face I had never seen before. "Isn't it?"

It wasn't really, but just seeing how happy David was made the whole space seem a little bit bigger.

"It sucks."

I turned to Paul, smacking him hard on the arm. "It does not!"

David chuckled, putting his arm around both of us. "Oh, I love you guys."

I smiled matched my brothers. "We love you too, David."

Paul shrugged. "Yeah, you're all right."

David pushed me away and brought Paul into headlock and started to rub his hair.

"Hey, no roughhousing in the living room!" Molly came into the living room, pushing them apart.

Paul laughed loudly, putting his arm around me, looking at Molly. "I bet you love saying that, Molly."

Molly smiled her beautiful smile. "I most certainly do."

David watched her as he put his arm around her. "No roughhousing in our living room, hey?"

Molly looked up at him and poked his chest. "Yes."

"Whatever you want, baby," David told her and they kissed.

"Get a room!" Paul yelled at them.

Molly pulled away, punching Paul in the shoulder. "Oh, hush. Don't you have a girl of your own?"

"He's too ugly to get one," I commented.

Paul sent me a glare. "I could get any girl, I just don't want one right now, all right?"

"What about you, Jane?"

I shook my head. "No in particular."

Paul snorted and I elbowed him. "Ow, Janey." I tried to give him a look that said, _don't you dare,_ but Paul didn't seem to catch it as he continued to say, "What about Tim?"

"Tim?" David asked, earning my attention as he crossed his arms. "Shepard? What're you doin' with him?"

"They've got a thing," Paul answered for me.

I hit him again. "Paul!"

Paul tried to seem innocent, not succeeding. "What?"

"Jane." David snapped his fingers at me. "Focus. What you got with Tim Shepard?"

"Nothing," I said quickly, holding up my hands. "We had a thing for a minute there, but not anymore."

"And Ray?"

I shook my head. "Never again."

David started to smile. "Little Janey's growing up."

I laughed, though I didn't want to encourage his teasing tone. "Shut up."

Molly clapped her hands, backing into the kitchen. "Doesn't anyone want a coke from our fridge from our kitchen - the kitchen we just had our first family dinner in?"

I chuckled at her excitement, nodding. "Thanks, Mol."

When she left, Paul stuffed his hands in his pockets and looked at David. "You ready for the rumble?"

David nodded stiffly. "Are the boys ready?"

"They're always ready." Paul looked over at me. "I would ask you to ask Shep, but -" My hard stare cut him off and he stumbled with the last of his sentence. "But...you know - it doesn't matter, it's - it - whatever."

I sighed, grabbing my jacket. "I think I'm gonna cut out."

"Why?" David asked.

"I was gonna go hang out with Pony."

"Molly's gonna be disappointed," Paul tried.

I smirked at the comment. "She'll be fine."

"All right, kid," David said, walking over to me and hugging me. "Visit soon, okay?"

I nodded when I pulled away. "I will." And then I turned around and walked out of the house, making a five minute walk over to the Curtis household - how convenient.

Pony and I were soon walking in the back alley, talking and laughing and having a nice time when Pony suddenly stopped.

"Shit."

I turned and looked at him. "You okay?"

Pony looked at me, a very guilty look on his face. "I promised Curly I would hang with him."

I shrugged, pretending that my heart didn't stop in my chest. "That's cool. Should we go grab him now?"

Pony's brows furrowed, walking closer to me slowly. "You sure?"

I sighed. "Pony, I don't need this, all right? Tim isn't gonna rule my life."

Pony nodded quickly, picking up the pace beside me and we walked over to the Shepard's. Pony knocked on the door, obviously noting the absence of Tim's car in the driveway, much to my relief.

"Hey!" Curly opened the door and yelled. He hopped out, smacking my backside and Pony's shoulder, walking ahead of us.

"Curly," I groaned, watching his stride away. "Why are you in such a good mood right now?"

Curly spun around, smile on his face. "Guess who got some last night?"

Pony chuckled. "I don't know, you?"

"Yes," Curly answered, smile widening. "Me. I did. Macy Lone."

"Congrats," I said unenthusiastically, managing to catch up to him.

"I'm feelin' good," Curly said quite loudly.

"That's good," Pony said and looked toward me. "Where are we goin'?"

"Bucks," Curly said quickly. "Macy's gonna be there tonight, so we're going."

I resisted the urge to say my real feelings, instead saying, "Sure. Let's go."

Curly's smile still hadn't left his face and he put his arms around the two of us. "Are you guys ready to watch the master work his magic?"

I scoffed. "Magic."

Pony laughed.

* * *

Pony and I sat beside each other, watching Curly desperately attempt to get Macy to kiss him and I had to laugh.

"Does Curly really have the moves?"

Pony glanced at me, giving me a mischievous look. "You'd be surprised."

Not a second later, Macy had thrown her arms around the younger Shepard and she was making out with him. Curly kissed her back, wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close as he leant against the wall.

I shook my head, raising my beer to my lips. "Well, god damn."

Pony laughed, doing the same thing. "I know." He took a sip, scanning the space, blushing after he caught the eyes of a pretty brunette. "Oh, god."

I chuckled, watching the girl say something to her friend. "She's about to walk over here."

"Is she?" Pony said nervously, only looking at me.

I smiled at him, looking him in his sweet eyes. "You can either make out with me to get her to leave or I can leave."

Pony smiled too, laughing a little. "Thanks, Jane."

I hit his arm. "Show her a good time, won't you?" I walked away just before the brunette walked up and I could hear them in the distance.

"Hi," the girl said, very flirtatious.

I'm sure Pony was blushing when he said, "Hi. Uh, can I get you drink?"

That was all I heard before I was out the door and walking around the back. I walked past all the really drunk kids and turned the two corners before I got to the ladder. I looked around to make sure no one was following before I climbed up.

I half expected Tim to be there, but he wasn't.

I sat on the edge of the building for a good hour. Just an hour by myself, listening to the people below and watching some of them. The clumsy first kisses and the drunk boys whistling at scantily dressed chicks.

I was sitting there in my own world, my own silence when I heard boots on the gravelled roof behind me. "This is my spot," I said loudly, not willing to share my time or silence with anyone at that moment.

"This is my spot, actually."

I stiffened, not able to move as Tim sat himself beside me. I didn't look at him, I just smoked my cigarette.

"I thought you quit, kid."

"I changed my mind."

Tim was looking at me. I knew he was. "Where have you been?"

I still didn't look at him. "What do you mean?"

"I've been callin' you and you haven't answered," Tim said to me in his rough voice, giving me the impression that he didn't really care. "Wanna come over later?"

"No."

"You all right, kid?"

"Fine."

Tim grabbed my chin, turning my face toward his, now angry. "Will you look me in the damn eyes?" His own eyes widened slightly. He was looking at my cheek. "What the hell happened?"

I pushed his hand away, putting my cigarette between my lips as I went to tie my hair back. "I got jumped."

"By Ray?" Tim asked and I had no idea why he was getting so worked up.

I took the cigarette out of my mouth, glancing at him. "Some kid from his gang," I answered.

Tim sighed lightly and quickly, patting my arm. "Hey." He stopped once I looked at him. "What the hell is goin' on with you?"

I narrowed my eyes at the same time I gave him a confused look. "Why do you care?"

"What are you talkin' about?" Tim acted as if it was a ridiculous question. "I want to know."

"It's none of your damn business," I said angrily, standing quickly, realizing just then how drunk I was.

Tim caught my arm, making sure I didn't fall over. "Why'd you say that?"

"I don't know," I said stubbornly, on my way to being petty. "Ask Amy."

Tim seemed genuinely confused. "Wha - Amy? Amy who?"

"The girl you make out with!"

Tim opened his mouth to yell, but closed it and seemed to be going through his brain. His eyes widened and then he sighed, looking me in the eyes. "She was comin' onto me. We only kissed the one time."

"It doesn't matter," I told him, pushing him away from me. "We're not together."

Tim shifted on his feet, his hands on his hips as he said, "I thought that's what you wanted."

I stared at him. "It is."

"You don't want to be my chick?"

I stepped back, shaking my head at him. "You're a character, Tim, for sure." I took another step back, the ball of my foot hitting air, not roof and I tipped back, waving my hands in the air and I started screaming.

"Jane!" Tim ran forward, catching my hand, making my body slam against the front of the building harshly.

I groaned, looking down at the ground.

It would've have been that far of a drop. Would I have died? Probably. Would I have broken any bones? Definitely.

"Jesus, are you crazy?!" Tim yelled at me, angrier than before. He groaned loudly, slowly yanking me up and pulling me over the edge.

I rolled onto the gravel, sighing at the stars. "Holy shit." My eyes started to water and my hands started to shake as I realized that I could've died within those short seconds. "Holy shit," I repeated.

"Jane." Tim's angry tone was gone. I looked over at him, breathing quickly, causing him to walk over to me and sit down beside me. He wrapped one arm around my back and pulled me into him, the other grasping my head and pushing my face into his shoulder. "You're fine."

I enjoyed the feeling of his body against mine. He was warm and inviting and I clutched onto his jacket, feeling comforted by his presence. "I know," I said once I calmed down, still holding onto him.

Tim rubbed my back and then pushed me away from him slightly. "You good, kid?"

I nodded quickly. "Yeah, I'm fine."

His thumb touched my cut, making me seethe and he apologized, pushing my hair out of my face. "Which guy got you?"

"Why?"

"So I can kick his ass."

I smiled a little, pushing his shoulder. "You're not doing a damn thing."

Tim shrugged, starting to smirk. "I'll get 'im back at the rumble."

I sighed, looking at the ground before returning to his face. "You're really gonna fight?"

"I owe your brother a favour," Tim replied, pulling me a little closer. "And I'm gonna love repayin' it."

I hated how close we were. Being that close, I had to kiss him, and I did. I wrapped my arms around him, missing his lips so much that I was a little too eager. I pushed my body on his and we rolled onto the gravel. My back hit the roof, Tim floating over my, kissing me as his hands roamed under my t-shirt. I used all my momentum to roll us over so that I was sitting on top of him. I started kissing his neck, his big hand gripping my bottom tightly.

I moaned, quickly leaning away and putting my hands on his chest. "Shit." I breathed out, looking up at the stars.

Tim started to sit up. "Wha -"

My hands still on his chest, I pushed him down. "Are you with Amy?" I asked him intensely, not wanting to be apart of any fight with Amy.

Tim shook his head. "No. It was just the one kiss. One -" He leaned up, hands on my waist. "Sloppy and stupid kiss."

I pulled his face toward mine, kissing him again. "Take me home," I said to him between kisses.

* * *

"I didn't get to that question," I told Pony, walking out of the school doors. "Why are we even talking about this? School is over for the day, let's do something fun."

Pony smiled my way. "Didn't you say Tim was gonna pick you up after school?"

I looked around the parking lot, not seeing Tim's car. "I think he might've ditched me."

"I don't know," Pony said unsurely. "You guys seem pretty serious."

"We're not," I said surely, looking at him. "I'm not his chick. I'm not anybodies chick." I watched the bouncing, brown ponytail come towards us over. "Speaking of chicks."

"Pony!" Tammy chirped, looping her arm through his and smiling at him.

Pony smiled back. "Hey, Tam."

She kissed his cheek and then glanced at me. "Hi, Jane!"

"Hi."

Tammy wasn't a bad person. I had encouraged their meeting at Bucks, but she was so perky and pretty. She was decent for Pony, but way too much for me. Maybe I was a little jealous - not because I wanted Pony to kiss me, not her, but because she was taking up all his time recently.

I knew the breakup was coming though and I couldn't wait for that day.

Tammy was so into Pony and he was mildly into her. He thought she was pretty, but she talked a whole lot and Pony found it hard to get a word in. Whenever we hung out, Pony would burst and talk my damn ear off.

Like I said, I couldn't wait for the breakup.

"So -" Tammy started up. "I was in biology and I just couldn't believe that -"

"Tim," I involuntarily said, spotting Tim's car roll up.

Pony gave me a somewhat desperate look. "Uh, Jane -"

I smiled his way, trying not to smirk. "Seeya, Pone." I looked at Tammy. "Later, Tammy." I quickly ran towards the car, bumping shoulders with someone. "Oh -"

Amy stared at me, looking me up and down. "Oh, Jane."

I nodded to her. "What's up?"

She sighed, looking at her nails briefly. "Nothing much." She looked up, her eyes on Tim's car. "Is that Tim?" She looked back at me. "He's here for you?"

"I'd think so."

Amy licked her lips and then started to smile. "He's a catch."

I tried to ignore the hotness my body started to feel. "I know. We're going together," I lied straight up, just to see the stupid look on her face.

And it was stupid. She was glaring and her jaw turned. "Congrats. I haven't seen him tied down since we were just kids."

I smirked. "Like you said, he's a catch."

"And a good kisser," she tried, smirking as well.

I just smiled widely, knowing that I had something she didn't. "And a good lay." I enjoyed her face once more before I waved and started walking away. "I'll see you around, Amy!" I laughed to myself, getting into Tim's car, which was much closer than I thought.

We kissed and then he started his car, nodding toward Amy on the benches. "What was that about?"

I sighed. "Just..." I looked at him. "Will you go steady with me?"

Tim chuckled, glancing over at me. "Don't you want me to ask you?"

"Come on," I said, giving him a tired look. "Just say you will."

Tim's lip upturned, glancing at me again. "Sure, kid."

I scooted closer, rubbing his chest and kissing his neck. "Great."

"Hey, Jane?"

"What?"

"Am I really that good of a lay?"

I laughed, grabbing his face to kiss his lips.


	8. Chapter 8

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 8:

* * *

"Jane."

I opened my eyes to the darkness, rolling over and mumbling, "What?"

"There's been an accident."

I was starting to wake up more. "What?"

Paul grabbed my arm and started to pull me out of my bed. "A car accident."

My eyes widened, even in my sleepy state. "David? Is he okay?"

"Not David," Paul said to me, handing me my jacket and pulling me towards the door.

I walked outside in my pyjamas, still a little frantic. "Paul, who the hell are we talking about?"

He sighed, opening the door to the car for me. "Just get in."

I got in the back, behind my mother, who was ready to go, and Paul, who was doing up his seatbelt. "What the hell is going on?" I asked loudly - too loudly for the quiet night. Or maybe it was morning.

It was dark. That was all I knew.

My mom glanced at me through the rearview mirror. "Your father's been in an accident."

I didn't know what to think or say, but the first thing that came out was, "Is he dead?"

"No," she answered. "But he's has been greatly injured."

I still didn't know what to think. "Oh." I made myself more comfortable in my seat. "Where are we going?"

"The hospital in Atoka County."

"How far?" Paul asked, letting me know that he had probably just been waken up too. I saw it then in his disheveled hair and pyjamas.

"About two hours," mom said, gripping the wheel nervously.

"Can we sleep?" I asked.

My mom chuckled lightly, catching my eyes in the mirror. "Of course, Jane."

I nodded, laying down in the backseat and sighing heavily. I had napped for about an hour, and when I woke up, we were parked. I sat up to see that we were parked at a gas station. I stretched out before reaching over the front seat and tapping Paul's shoulder. "Paul."

Paul turned around at the first tap. "I'm awake."

I sighed heavily, leaning back into my seat. "Does David know?"

Paul nodded. "Yeah. He said he'd be on the road as fast as he could."

"Do you know what happened?"

Paul gave me a somber look and I wasn't sure it was because he was sad or because the news was sad. "He was driving while he was drunk off his ass."

"I hope the asshole hit a thick tree," I said, only thinking aloud.

"No," Paul said, looking forward again. "He hit another car. A family."

"Oh, shit," I said, eyes widening. "Are they okay?"

"They died."

I didn't understand the world. If everyone was so hellbent on God and his holy powers, why did terrible things happen? And to people who didn't deserve it? Why did assholes get drunk and take other people's lives? If God was the big protecter, why didn't he protect them?

I didn't know what I believed in, but I knew that if anyone deserved to be dead, it was my shitty father.

"Jane?"

My eyes shifted to Paul, looking at him for a solid three seconds. "Why are we even going to see him?"

Paul sighed. "Mom says actually been in the hospital for a week, but he's goin' to jail as soon as he recovers. We probably won't see him for a while."

"Good," I commented, crossing my arms. "It'll be easier to pretend he doesn't exist."

"Jane," Paul said in a warning tone.

"What?" I said incredulously, wondering why he was into defending our dad all of the sudden.

"He could've died."

"Good!"

"He's our dad!"

"He's an asshole!"

Paul shook his head, his yelling ceasing. "Don't you remember all the good times?" He turned as much as he could in his seat to face me. "Don't you remember all those times he used to take us to the park and let us eat all the ice cream we could ever want?" Paul searched my face and continued when I didn't want to talk. "He wasn't always an ass, Janey, and you would be crying like a baby if he was dead."

I knew it was true. I don't know how Paul had gotten so smart so fast, but I knew what he was saying was true.

I huffed, laying back down in the backseat. "What time is it?"

"6 somethin'."

That was when I remember. "How the hell are you gonna make it back for the rumble tonight?"

"I'll catch a ride back with David."

"What, mom's gonna stay the whole damn day?"

"Probably."

"I'll catch a ride with you too, then."

"No, you won't."

I shot up, grabbing his shoulder. "What do you mean I'm not?"

"Mom needs someone, Jane," Paul said seriously, glancing back at me. "He was mighty awful to her, but she stills loves the guy and she's upset about it. She's been trying not to cry the whole damn car ride. She needs someone."

"Fine," I said reluctantly, too tired to argue.

Mom was coming out of the gas station, and she was holding three colas.

Another hour of driving in almost complete silence, the faint humming of the radio in the background, we had reached the hospital.

We walked inside, my mom a strong leader, my brother and I slowly trailing behind. She asked for dad's name and we got the room number. Again, she strode in long, wanting strides while my brother and I slowly walked behind her.

We saw her duck into a room and Paul said to me, "Be nice."

"I will," I promised.

I walked inside and my dad was lying on a white hospital bed. His hair wasn't gelled back neatly and his face looked like it hadn't been shaven in a little while. His eyes has huge bags under them and he had a couple of cuts spread out on his sagging face.

He looked awful.

He smiled once he saw the three of us. "Hey."

Mom walked up to him, standing near him but not that close. "Hi, Richard."

Dad looked at Paul. "Pauly, boy, lookin' good."

Paul nodded. "Thanks, dad."

Then dad looked at me. "Jane." He sighed, looking me up and down. "You look the exact same." And then he laughed. "Been getting into some fights?"

I didn't touch my healing cut. I just nodded. "Yeah."

"That's my girl," he said, trying to pretend that we were friends.

The three of us stood around awkwardly until a nurse came in with a tray of decent-looking food. She set the tray down with a smile and then left the room quickly.

"Everyone's been so nice here," dad said, reaching for his pudding cup.

He looked worse, but he seemed so different. Maybe it was just the fact that I had never really seen him not totally pissed.

"How do you feel?" mom asked.

Dad shrugged, offering up another stupid smile. "I feel all right, you know. I've had better days." He looked at the three of us before he picked up his spoon, and then he sighed and set his food down. "I know I've made a lot of mistakes. But this experience has changed me."

"How?" Paul asked quickly, not falling for it as quickly as my mother seemed to be.

Dad looked serious and so...awake and not drunk. It was still so weird. He looked Paul in the eyes, switching between him, me and mom for what he said next. "I've taken lives because of my drinking problem. I've taken away a family from this world because of something _I_ did." He sighed, shaking his head at himself. "The drinking needs to stop. It makes me someone I don't like anymore."

"Bullshit," I said, seeing through every little word he spouted, and Paul put an arm out in front of me.

"Jane!" mom gasped.

I looked at her. "You honestly believe he's going to be a better person? You know how he is!"

"People can change," my father said.

I turned to his, my face hot from my anger. "You killed innocent people! You've hit me and Paul and David more times than I can count!" I pushed Paul's arm away, advancing toward him. "That little realization speech doesn't automatically make up for all the shit you've done." I snarled, wanting to spit in his face. "I can't remember the last time I loved you and thought of you as family because I've _always_ despised you!"

"Jane!" my mother was yelling. "That's enough!"

"I hate you!" I screamed at his stupid face. "I hate you!"

Paul wrapped his arms around me, pulling me out of the room faster than I could blink, right into the middle of the hallway. I instantly started to cry, my knees failing me as I sobbed painfully.

"Hey, you're okay," Paul said softly to me, wrapping his arms tighter around me. "You're fine." He dragged me over to the seats against the wall, sitting both of us down.

I was barely making any sound. My chest was hurting too much. I wasn't taking in enough air to even breathe, and I could barely say, "I hate him."

"I know you do." Paul patted my back, his hand too rough and cold to be comforting, looking down at my reddened face. "Why don't you go to the cafeteria, huh?"

I tried to calm myself down, breathing deeply and rubbing my face dry. "Okay." I looked over at him. "Can I make a call?"

Paul searched his pockets, scraping enough change for one call. "It's all I got, Janey."

I took it graciously, standing quickly. "Thanks." I walked around him and went straight for the door to the outside. I walked toward the payphone, picking it up and hesitating a the change sat in front of the slot it was supposed to go in.

Who was I going to call? What exactly was my plan here?

I pushed the change inside, dialling the number and waiting as I heard it ringing.

 _"Hello?"_

It was clearly not who I wanted. "Is Ponyboy there?"

 _"One sec."_ I waited for exactly seven seconds before the phone muffled and then someone breathed into it. _"Hello?"_

"Pony?" I said, my voice cracking. "It's Jane."

 _"Are you okay?"_

I leaned against the payphone, wiping my eyes again. "I'm in Atoka County," I said, breathing deeply in between. "My dad got in an accident."

 _"Oh, wow,"_ Pony said in his sweet voice. _"Is he okay?"_

I sobbed, clutching the phone. "I should want him to be dead." I took a deep breath in to calm myself down, but I only ended up crying more. "I should want him to be dead for everything he's done to me - to my mom - to my brothers." I shut my eyes tightly, waiting for his calming voice.

 _"Jane,"_ he said, his warm voice like a nice hug. _"It's normal to feel the way you do. Yeah, he's an ass, but he's still your dad. He's the person you taught you how to ride a bike, raised you - your dad is special to you no matter what."_

I was breathing a little better. "He says he changed and I don't believe a damn word he says." I sniffled, my voice more steady as I went on to explain. "He was driving drunk and he hit another car and they died. He says its turned him around and my mom is buying in to his bullshit."

 _"And you think he's lying?"_

"Yes."

 _"Then go with your gut. You don't have to believe him if you don't want."_

"What the hell am I supposed to do here?"

 _"Go to the cafeteria and stay there."_

I nodded, though Pony obviously couldn't see me. "Okay." I sighed heavily, shifted on my feet and looking down at the ground. "You ready for the rumble tonight?"

 _"As ready as I could ever be,"_ Pony said, seeming to sigh. _"All the boys are pumped. They're just excited to whoop some Tiger ass."_

I smiled, finding the idea of Pony whooping ass a little ridiculous. "Don't get to roughed up now you hear."

 _"Me? Never."_

"Alright, well, I've got to go. Hey, Pony -" I started to say, figuring it was too late to go back now, so I'd might as well say it. "Thank you. I knew I could count on your call."

Pony laughed lightly on the other end. _"Don't go all soft on me."_

"Oh, shut up." I laughed, stepping close to the phone booth. "Goodbye."

 _"Bye."_

I hung up the phone, walking back inside, past dad's room and straight to the cafeteria. I would eat some food and stay away from the huge asshole.

* * *

David had showed up and stopped by the room. I don't know what he said or what he did, but he went in alone and then came out five minutes later with Paul, walking toward the door.

When I had caught up with them, I already knew what David was gonna say.

 _"Hey -" I caught David's arm. "Where are you guys goin'?"_

 _"We're leaving," David said quickly._

 _"So soon?"_

 _David sighed, looking down at me. "He deserves much worse than what he got, Jane, and though I don't encourage bad behaviour, I'm glad you got it all out."_

 _I looked at Paul, glaring a little. "Did you tell him **everything**?" __Paul nodded, stuffing his hands into his pockets and I looked back at David. "I'm sorry I lashed out, but I still want nothing to do with him."_

 _David looked at me, not how Paul was earlier. "And that's okay, Jane. Just because he's injured, doesn't mean we gotta feel bad for him." He hesitated before taking a step toward me and hugged me. "I'm proud of you, kid and I love your dumbass."_

 _I smiled, hugging him back. "I love you too."_

 _"Oh, yeah, love you guys too."  
_

 _I laughed as David brought Paul into the hug, squeezing both of us tightly._

But they still left without me, and I went back to the cafeteria until it was starting to get a little bit dark.

That was when my mom came out of the room and sat down across from me at the table, sighing quaintly. "How are you doing out here?"

"I'm fine," I said quietly, not looking at her. "Can we go now?"

"Yes."

I looked up at her. "Really?"

She nodded and I notice that her eyes were red and puffy, like she has been crying. "Yes."

We both stood and we walked silently to the car. A minute in, I couldn't take the silence any longer. "What happened?"

Mom grabbed the wheel and turned it sharply, pulling away from the hospital. "He told me that he changed. He said he was going to stop drinking. He promised me that he was going to be the man I fell in love with and the father that he used to be."

I shook my head. "Mom, you don't really believe -"

"And I told him I wanted a divorce."

My heart stopped. "What?"

Mom only looked forward, but I could see her swallow back her sadness. "I told him -" Her voice shook. "That I want a divorce. I don't want him in the house or around my kids anymore." A tear fell down her cheek and she gripped the wheel.

"Mom," I said consolingly, scooting across the seat to be closer.

She cried. "I know it hurts you to be around him. I know you hate him, Jane, and I don't blame you. I see that way David looks at him, like he wants to kill him." She sobbed, almost identical to how I was hours ago. "I can't let him into our lives because I know what kind of person he is. He's never going to change."

Wow.

I didn't know what to say. I was almost ecstatic, but I was too shocked to realize it. I knew David wouldn't care in the least and he would be overjoyed. But Paul was the one I was concerned about. Paul got hurt the least out of all of us and he still cared about dad out of all of us. Mom loved him, but she knew better. I'm sure Paul did too, but Paul was always the worst at letting things go, and it would take a while to let dad go.

I came back to my mother swerving on the road. I grabbed the wheel. "Mom!"

"I'm fine," she insisted, taking the wheel back and wiping her eyes.

I sighed, scooting close enough that our thighs were touching and I leaned my head on her shoulder. "Thank you," I said to her, staring out at the road ahead of us. "Thank you."

We drove in silence, no radio. Mom had stopped crying within ten minutes and we drove back without saying anything. We drove all the way back to Tulsa in the dark and I knew that at that moment, the rumble was happing.

Every time my mother tapped the brakes or turned the wheel, someone was getting punched in the face, losing a tooth, breaking a hand, getting kneed in the stomach. There would be yelling and there would be blood and I hoped that everyone was okay.

David wouldn't have any trouble, that I knew. Paul was grown enough to take care of himself. I was sure Pony would be fine because he had the smarts for it. And Tim. From what I heard, Tim was unbeatable in a rumble. He was probably getting his nose broken all over again, but he would be fine in the end.

When we got home, I told my mom that she should go to bed and that I was going to walk over to the Curtis's. She listened and I started to walk.

I sat on the Curtis's front porch until I saw a group of rowdy boys run up to the house, each one bloodied differently, all smiling widely. They all ran past me, only Pony taking a seat beside me.

"Hey, Jane."

I smiled, reaching out and wiping some blood from his forehead. "You won I take it?"

"We sure as hell did."

I stood, still smiling. "Well, I just wanted to make sure you were all right."

Pony stood too, nodding to his door. "You wanna come in for a cola or somethin'?"

I shook my head, stepping closer and hugging him quickly. "I'm glad you're okay."

Pony hugged me back and I started to walk away from the house, stopping when he called out, "How'd things go today?"

I turned around, walking backward as I said, "My mom's gettin' a divorce," I said, knowing that I was smiling just as wide, like I had won the rumble too.

Pony cheered, being very unlike his quieter self. "Woo! That's what I'm talkin' about!"

I laughed loudly, watching his messy hair blow in the wind, his strong arms raised in the air and his attractive face smiling at me. The sweet kid damn near changed my whole life when he became my friend - my best friend. I felt the love fill up inside of me, and I cheered too. "Woo!"

Pony laughed just as loud, throwing his head back. When it whipped back up, he gave me a wave. "Now get off my property, King! We don't owe you now favours no more!"

I saluted him. "You've got it, Curtis!" I spun around and ran off, thankful that Pony seemed almost completely okay. I ran and then walked the rest of the way to the Shepard's household.

Curly was lying down across the third porch step, holding a cloth to his nose.

"How you doin', Curly?"

Curly groaned as he leaned up, his eye purple as it followed me as I walked closer. He smiled under the cloth. "Hey, Janey. I'm great."

I sat down beside him, examining his face. "Did you break it?"

"I don't know. You tell me." Curly took away to cloth to a clearly broken nose.

I cringed. "Yeah, you broke it."

Curly only laughed. "Oh, yeah, baby." He held out his hand. "Give me some."

I shook my head as I high-fived him. "Is Tim home?"

Curly nodded to the door. "He's inside."

I stood, patting his knee as I walked past him. "Nice job, Curly." I walked inside the house and I started toward the bathroom, where I could hear the tap running. "Tim?"

Tim came out of the bathroom, blood around his mouth. "Hey, kid." He disappeared back into the bathroom.

I walked inside, watching his cleaning up his face, washing away the blood that I had previously seen. "I heard you won."

"We sure as hell did."

I walked closer, running my hand over his back. "Are you okay?"

He leaned up, drying his face and tossing the town into the tub. "I'm good." He leaned down, pecking my cheek and walked around me to go to his room. "Where were you all day?"

I sighed, falling onto his bed as he shut the door. "My dad got into an accident, so we went over to Atoka County Hospital to see him."

"Oh, shit," Tim said, pulling his bloody shirt over his head. "Is he all right?"

"He'll be fine," I told him. "He's goin' to jail as soon as he's good enough."

Tim watched me carefully, probably deciding based on my facial expression what to say, and then he said, "Huh. For how long?"

"Don't know," I said honestly, laying down on the soft bed. "I don't care. My mom's divorcing him, finally."

Tim nodded, pulling down down his pants to reveal his white underwear. "That's good." He walked over to the bed, laying on top of it. He looked me over. "You okay, kid?"

I nodded, wondering how Tim could be so simple about things, yet so comforting. He must've sensed that I didn't really want to talk about it because he didn't question me further.

Tim just put his arm under my body and pulled me into him. "You stayin' over?" I felt his lips on my head and he sighed into my hair. "Cause I'm gonna pass out right now."

I smiled as I wrapped my arm around him. "I can't." I didn't want to, but I didn't want to leave my mom alone and I wanted to see Paul after todays news. "But you wanna go out tomorrow?"

"I'll pick you up after work. How's that sound?"

"Great." I pulled away from his embrace a little to kiss him. When I leaned away, I touched his cut up lip gently. "Did you kick some ass, baby?"

Tim smiled and I could feel his fingers on my back. "Yes, ma'am." His smile softened and he kept looking at me. "I kicked Ray's pansy ass in front of all his buddies."

I was filled with unexpected joy. "Good." I kissed him slowly and softly once more before I quickly rolled off the bed, adjusting my jacket on my body. "Call me tomorrow."

Tim sighed, rolling fully onto his back and closing his eyes. "Sure, kid."

I watched his beautiful form slowly drift into sleep as his chest rose up and down. "Goodnight." I didn't hear him respond as I closed the door behind me.

I was out of that house and back at mine at a decent pace. I sort of took my time, but I when I saw my porch, I ran the rest of the way to my place. I jogged inside, almost running right past Paul on the couch.

Paul look up at me, one of his eyes purple and more closed than the other. "Hey."

I walked over to him, sitting down beside him on the uncomfortable couch. "How'd it go?"

"We won."

"I heard."

"Yeah." Paul put the icepack to his eye again, cringing a little at the impact. "I stick by me saying Ray's a candyass."

I laughed. "Remember when you caught me going out to see him?"

"Which damn time?" Paul asked, sounding annoyed, but he was smiling.

I nudged his shoulder as best I could while I was sunken into the couch. "Hey, I've grown."

"Because Tim's better."

"Oh, whatever," I said back, not having a good comeback at that moment.

Paul was quiet for a couple of seconds before saying, "Mom's gettin' a divorce."

"I know." I looked at him. "You all right?"

That question was circling so much throughout the day, but every single person who was asked and asked it need that question more than anything.

Paul just turned to me. "He's gonna be gone, Jane. We're probably never gonna see him again - not even when he gets out of jail."

"I know," I said, watching the future work its way through his mind carefully. "You good?"

Paul then nodded, surprising me. "We've got mom. And we've got David." He looked at me, icepack still at his eye. "And I've got you. I don't need that asshole."

I immediately started to smile, breaking eye contact and leaning my head against his strong shoulder. "You know, you're actually a smart guy."

"Hey, thanks, Janey."

"You're welcome, Paul."

"Am I your favourite brother now?"

I smiled. "Maybe."


	9. Chapter 9

An Intermission

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And then onto Part 2 of this story...


	10. Chapter 10

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

A/N: Here's the second part to this story! Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 9:

* * *

"Here we go."

I laughed loudly, lurching to a stop at the stop sign and quickly running out of the car, letting the cars behind us honk.

It was night and there weren't many cars anyway.

Curly, Pony and I ran around the car twice before all of us got back in, each in a different spot. Chinese Fire drill. It never got old.

I pressed down on the gas, speeding off. I laughed along with them, holding out my hands. "You both owe me a shiny nickel."

"Like hell we do," Curly argued, big smile on his face.

"No, she's right, Curly," Pony said, slapping a nickel into my hand. "It took us more than five, less than ten."

Curly grumbled in the backseat, but gave me my nickel. "There you go, J. Happy?"

"Very." I smiled smugly.

"Pull over at the mart. I need a Coke."

I pulled into the parking lot, letting Curly hop out and watching him skip inside. I turned to Pony. "If this wasn't Curly's car, I'd peel off right now."

Pony chuckled, his arm finding the ratted seat. "This thing really is a piece of work."

"At least he's got one, hey?"

I didn't have a car and neither did Pony. Despite being almost graduated and both having stable jobs, two things Curly didn't have, we still didn't have cars.

"We still going out tomorrow?"

"Of course," I told him. "How could I not celebrate my birthday?"

I used the hate birthdays. I used to hate celebrations, but now I had Pony and Curly to celebrate them with. I just had to convince Tim to come along. The second I said 'dance', Tim said he wouldn't do it.

"We're getting pretty old, huh?"

I looked at how handsome Pony was. He had really shot up in height, leaving his long legs to be uncomfortably situated in the front seat he was in. And he had certainly filled out over the year or so that we knew each other. His hair got bigger and so did his smile. He was really starting to look like his fox of a brother and all the girls started noticing too.

"You decided on a college yet?"

Pony shrugged his shoulders, putting a long leg up on the dash. "Darry says I oughta get serious about it, but I don't know if I wanna go."

"You have to," I told him, just like I had been telling him for months. "Pony, you're too smart not to go."

"What about you?" he shot back.

"Hey, I'm applying," I defended.

"To places you don't even wanna go," Pony said, adding a laugh to this serious conversation. "I mean, come on, Janey, Tulsa Community College?"

"What?" I said innocently. "I'm applying to places I might actually get in."

"You don't wanna go to Tulsa Community College. You could turn out like - like -" Pony pointed to Curly stepping out of the convenient store and struggling with just three Cola's. "Like Curly."

I laughed, letting Curly in the car. "You got us Coke's, Curly?"

"Of course I did," Curly said, like he was the nicest person in the world - which he was not. "You guys are my best friends."

"Thanks." I took the drink. "But you're still not allowed to bring any girls tomorrow."

"Well, shit, Jane!" Curly groaned, furrowing his brows at me. "What good is a party if I don't get laid?"

I laughed, putting the Coke between my legs and backing out of the lot. "If you can convince your brother to come, you can bring whatever girl you want."

"Deal!"

We drove around for a little while longer and I eventually made it home.

I walked inside quietly, knowing well that it was late.

"Well, well, well -" Paul stood from his spot on the couch. "Look who decided to show up."

I smiled at my older brother. "You were waiting for me?" I walked closer. "Awe. So sweet."

"Can it, Jane," he said to me, shaking his head and started towards the hallway. "Just 'cause you're turning eighteen in two minutes doesn't mean you're all mature and stuff now. You've still got a curfew, alright?"

I followed him down the hall, my head now at his neck. I had gotten a little taller too. "Did you get me a present?"

"Yeah," Paul scoffed. "The gift of not tellin' mom you were out 'til midnight."

I stopped at my bedroom door, turning to face him. "I'll take it."

Paul smiled, reaching out to ruffle my hair, to which I quickly swatted his hand, and he started to back away. "Goodnight, Janey. And happy birthday."

I smiled widely, nervous and happy at the fact that I was eighteen. "Thanks, Pauly. Don't let the bed bugs bite. Or do."

Paul took an intimidating step forward, making me run into my room.

* * *

I had a lot of convincing to do, but I had managed to do it.

 _"Come on, Tim," I said to him. "It's not even in Tulsa, it's in Oakhurst. None of your tuff friends are gonna see you there."_

 _Tim shook his head, holding his newspaper out and saying a quick and simple, "No."_

 _I pulled his newspaper away, putting it down on the table. "Come on. It's my birthday."_

 _"Oh, well, happy birthday."_

 _I hid my smile, sitting down in his lap. I wrapped my arms around his neck, kissing his cheek softly. "Come on, baby." My lips brushed against his ear. "We booked a hotel for overnight. One room for Curly and Pony and another just for myself."_

 _Tim sighed heavily, closing his eyes as if he was doing something really painful. "Alright."_

 _I smirked, enjoying the look on his face._

I smirked, really enjoying the look on Tim's face as he drove the car. "Happy birthday to me."

Pony and Curly laughed and sang in the backseat, Tim's face getting more and more red as time went on. He was just barely holding it together and I knew he couldn't wait until we got there and could be rid of the two.

When we pulled up to the club, music was bursting from inside, and when those doors opened, I felt the joy. The red lighting reminded me of Buck's, but everything else didn't. Everyone was dancing and laughing and drinking just like Buck's, but the place was spacious and nice-looking. The bar ran all the way across one wall and their were fans hanging from the ceiling to keep it getting too hot.

We walked in right at The Beatles's Twist and Shout. Pony grabbed my shoulder quite quickly, pulling one arm as I pulled his, our feet sliding on the floor. He would spin me and I would spin him and we would laugh.

"This is awesome," I said.

"Happy birthday, Jane." Pony smiled lightly, spinning me around again.

I smiled back, glancing over his shoulder at Curly. "At least one of you remembered," I teased, staring at Curly's feeble attempt at getting a pretty girl. I looked around for Tim, spotting his back at the bar.

The song was coming to an end and I started to make my way towards Tim, telling Pony over my shoulder "I'll be back."

Stay by Maurice Williams and the Zodiacs started to play loudly.

 _(Stay)_

 _A-a-a-a-ah, just a little bit longer_

I reached out and touched Tim's shoulder, squeezing it. "Hey."

 _(Please)_

Tim just glanced over his shoulder, beer cupped in his hand. "Yeah?"

 _Please, please, please, please_

 _tell me you're going to_

I smiled, using all my effort to spin him around in his chair. "Dance with me."

Tim chuckled, like it was the most ridiculous thing he'd ever heard. He stopped once he saw my serious face and gave me one back. "No."

I put my hand on his chest, sliding it up and around his neck. "Come on, Tim."

He just shook his head and said, "No."

I stared at him for a couple of seconds, listening to the music play in the background. Then I nodded. "Okay." I took a couple of steps back, starting to sway my hips. "Your loss."

I was wearing my tightest jeans and a cute little top. My mother probably wouldn't have let me leave the house looking the way I did, and she'd probably smack me if she saw the way I was dancing just then.

 _If we have another dance_

 _Yeah, just -_

I looked at Tim, mouthing, _"One more time."_ I smiled, feeling his eyes on me as I did a slow turn, always moving my hips around his slow circles. When I turned around, Tim's eyes moved from my behind to my eyes quickly.

The guys beside Tim were looking at me, one even nudging him to join me. Tim chuckled to his beer before setting down and walking over to me slowly. He was reluctant to dance, but his hands found my hips rather quickly.

I smirked. "I know you can dance," I said rather confidently. "I know how your hips move." My hands slid down to his hips, encouraging them to move against mine.

We were so close together, bodies moving together nicely and I just enjoyed the moment.

My hands ran through his hair as my nose touched his for a moment. I leaned my face away slightly to continue mouthing the lyrics to my favourite song. _"Won't you press your sweet lips to mine? Won't you say you love me all of the time?"_

 _(Stay)_

 _Just a little bit longer_

My arms tightened around his back and we kissed.

 _(Please)_

 _Please, please, please, please_

 _Tell me you're going to_

 _Come on, come on, come on and yey-yey-yeh_

 _Come on, come on, come on and stay-yey-yey-yeh_

 _Come on, come on, come on and stay,_ _whoops!_

 _Come on, come on, come on_

God, I was one lucky girl. I had some nice friends, a fine man, and a great family. I was at an amazing time in my life. Everything was perfect. Emphasis on the _was_.


	11. Chapter 11

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 10:

* * *

I walked down the hallway, enjoying the silence. I was late for class, but I wasn't exactly in a rush. I had managed to make it to biology, saluting the teacher as I walked inside. I sat down right next to Pony and opened my textbook. "What page?"

"267."

I flipped through the pages, finally getting on that page. "Oh, great. Enzymes. Love 'em." I looked at Pony, following his eyes to the back of some girls head. "You alright, Pony?"

"She was just looking at me."

I laughed quietly. "Well, look at you go."

Pony turned to me, smile on his face. "I'm serious."

I looked at the girl, who did look back - not at Pony, but at me. And she was glaring. I waved a friendly wave her way, annoying her all the more.

Amy had it out for me for way too long. She was my friend for a hot five minutes before she turned on me. She threw a drink in my face, kissed my kind-of-boyfriend and glared at me. Amy was petty. And a total bitch, might I add

"Who's that again?" Pony asked once he saw me wave.

"Amy." I groaned, tapping my fingers against the table. "If she keeps looking over here, she's gonna get it."

"Jane -"

"I'm serious."

"You don't need to be suspended. _Again._ "

I rolled my eyes, grabbing my pen once I saw the teacher writing something on the board. "I'm just sayin'."

Pony was writing too, but we were great multitasks, so we kept talking. "You work today?"

"At 4, yeah."

"Curly and I are gonna come with you after school."

"Why?" I asked, only because they spent way too much money there.

Pony shrugged. "He's chasing some tale. Mandy something."

"Mandy Hall or Lane?"

"Lane."

I nodded. "I work with her." I considered why Curly would like the air headed girl and I had summed it up to the fact that she had 'a huge rack', as Curly would say. "She's good people."

"Is anyone Curly's interested in good people?"

"Yes," I said. "It's anyone who will actually make it with Curly that is _not_ good people."

Pony and I laughed about that, earning the teacher's glare.

"Is there something you need to say, Miss King?"

"Nope," I answered simply, continuing to take the notes.

The teacher turned around and Pony and I continued to joke.

The bell seemed to take forever to ring, but once it did, I raced out. Pony went off to his locker and so did I. I was walking along the hallway when I felt a nudge at my shoulder.

My bio book hit the ground and I groaned. "Damnit." I bent down to pick it up, tucking it under my arm before I spun around.

"Jane," Amy greeted with a tight smile. She had a pretty face, she just had nothing important to say. "How are you?"

"I'm great, Amy," I said to her, turning around and starting to walk back down the hall.

"You're not gonna ask how I am?" She stepped up beside me, smacking her gum. I hoped it got caught in her big, blonde hair.

"No."

"That's rude."

"Okay."

"Got nothing to say?"

I grew tired of her taunting quick. "I got plenty to say," I said, turning to face her, hands curled around my textbook tightly. "But I don't know if you'll understand."

Amy gave me her unimpressed face. "You think I'm stupid, huh?"

"Not stupid, just..." I shrugged, pretending to think about it. "Troubled."

Amy pushed my shoulders roughly, the anger plastered on her face. "Try me, King."

I caught myself, adjusting my books in my arms. "Okay, but there's gonna be some big words." I smirked. "Just let me know if you need me to slow down."

"Jane!" My head turned down the hallway, catching a running Curly coming my way. He threw his arm around me. "How's my girl?" he asked, glancing at Amy. "Ally."

"It's Amy," Amy corrected, eyes coming back to me. "Going through the Shepards, are you, Jane?"

"There's only two, so I'll be done soon," I said sarcastically, pushing Curly away from me. "You can have him when I'm done."

"Which one?" Amy smirked, licking her lips.

That pissed me off; thinking of Tim and Amy.

"Which one do you think?" I bit out, making Amy laugh triumphantly.

"I've hit a nerve." She smiled widely, her hands on her small hips. "Maybe I could get Tim to kiss me again. It wasn't hard last time."

I punched her right in the face. I punched her _hard._

Within the next five minutes, I was in the office and I was getting suspended. I was overdue on my strikes, but the principle was having a good day. He gave me a three-day suspension that would play right into the weekend.

I was thankful that I was going straight to work after school, because my mother would be raging. And Paul would get to bug me about it until it was over. And my chores would be doubled.

Well, shit.

* * *

"She had the sweetest little -"

"Curly," I interrupted. "Yeah, I don't need to hear about Mandy's behind."

Curly laughed, staring off into the distance. "It's pretty sweet."

Pony laughed too, watching Curly daydream. "You're messed up, Curly."

Curly turned to look at Pony. "Don't pretend you haven't looked, man."

I smiled at Pony's blush. "At least Pony has the decency to not tell every ear about it."

Curly smirked my way, reminding me too much of Tim. "People talk about you too, J."

I pretended not to to interested, shifting in the booth. "What do they say?"

"They talk about your sweet ass too."

"God - Curly!" I grabbed the salt shaker from the table, throwing it at Curly's chest. I then stood, taking my notepad out of my apron. "I have to get back to work. I'm gonna get fired if I keep doing this."

"Get us some shakes, won't you?"

I looked down at Curly. "Will you pay for them?"

"No," Curly said honestly.

"Then no." I turned around and walked around to the other couple of tables, watching through the window at a bunch of greasers. I saw my brother's car turn into the parking lot.

Paul got out and said hi to a couple of people before walking inside with his buddy Chip. Paul saw me and walked over. "Mom told me about your day." He smirked, pulling out a cigarette. "Old habits die hard, huh?"

I took the cigarette away from him, sliding it into my pouch. "We're trying not to smoke in here."

Paul walked around me, looking at Chip. "What the hell's the point of comin' here then?"

I followed them to their table, clicking my pen. "What can I get for you?"

"A better sister."

I smacked the back of Paul's head, hearing Chip laugh. "No discount for you today." I looked at Chip. "Got a smartass comment for me too?"

He shook his head, smirking. "No, ma'am."

I nodded firmly, glaring at Paul before I walked away to get their regular orders they got every single time.

I hadn't meant to get suspended. I even regretted punching Amy. I wished I had the self control to just walk away from her, but she was really good at provoking me. It was one of her talents, I guess.

To avoid my mother, I went out to Buck's after work, leaving Pony and Curly once we walked in. They went off to do their guy-thing and I walked over to Tim at the pool table. He was with a couple of friends, trying to win a game.

I grabbed his beer from the edge of the table, sitting down in the seat a foot or two behind him. I watched his jeans as he bent over, sinking a ball into one of the holes.

"Nice, Shep!" one of the guy's said, twirling his stick and getting ready to take his own turn.

Tim turned around to me, grabbing the beer from my hands. "How are you doin', kid?"

I shrugged. "Fine."

"You just get off work?"

I nodded, taking the beer back and taking a long sip. "I got suspended today," I confessed.

Tim didn't have much of a reaction. "For what?" He put his big hand on the wall, leaning against it.

"I punched Amy in the face."

Tim's lips twitched and I knew he wanted to smile, but he didn't really. He took the beer back, taking a step closer. "What'd she say?"

I shook my head and stood. "Nothing important." I wrapped my arms around his torso, leaning up on my toes and kissing his lips. I tasted the beer and the cigarette smoke. As much as I wished he would quit smoking, I loved it when we kissed.

Even though it had been a little under a year, Tim and I hadn't mentioned any seriousness or future plans. We never told each other we loved one another, though I thought it was obvious. I wasn't really sure of Tim's feelings because he never said. He was one of my best friends more than anything. We kissed and we spent almost every night together, but Tim never showed me interest in pursuing any kind of future.

I knew that was just how Tim was. He wasn't the guy that was gonna tell you everything he was feeling and he wasn't a pansy. But that made him a little difficult to read. We were going steady together, but _still,_ Tim didn't talk about us very often.

I easily loved him. I knew that for sure. How Tim felt? That was the mystery to me. I mean, he must've liked me quite a lot to have me stick around for so long.

"What're you thinkin' about, kid?"

I didn't want to scare him away with the topic, so every time it popped up in my mind, I just pushed it away. "Nothin'."

"Alright. Give me a good luck kiss, won't you?" Tim pecked my lips, grabbing his stick again and going back to the pool table.

I spent the rest of the night watching Tim play pool until he won. We went back to his car and talked until he dropped my off at my house. I had been perfectly okay with going back to Tim's, but he insisted that I talk to my mom about my suspension.

And, boy, did I get an earful from her.

"You oughta smarten up, Jane."

"I know, I know." I gave in, not having the energy to argue. I rubbed my face, running my hands in my hair and massaging my scalp. "I messed up and I'm sorry."

"Double the chores."

I nodded. "That's fair."

My mom sighed, her tense body slumping as she sat down in the chair. "How's this gonna look on a college application, Jane?"

"Should I even go?"

"Yes!" my mother said loudly. "One of you has to! And scholarships, Jane! You need to be good to get scholarships!"

If David had gone, maybe my mom wouldn't be nagging me about it so much.

"Okay!" I countered, standing and taking my coat in my hand. "You know I'm applying"

"I know you are, but -"

"Goodnight, mom," I said loudly, jogging down the hallway before we had to talk about it anymore. It was all we had talked about in the summer and I couldn't take it any damn longer.

A month ago, life had seemed so nice. I knew it wouldn't last forever and I had to right to be mad about it, but I was.

I fell onto my bed, falling asleep within minutes.


	12. Chapter 12

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 12:

* * *

"Well, at least drop me off at my brother's," I teased, making it to Tim's car, walking around to the drivers side. "And let me drive."

Tim smiled, stopping in front of me and putting his hands on the sides of my body. "You're never gonna drive my car." He took a step forward, pressing his body against mine. "Curly told me about your driving skills."

I pushed him. "Oh, shut -"

Tim kissed me, cutting me off. His hands were off the car and on me, hugging me close to his body and my own pressed up against the car. A couple of whistles made us break apart and Tim gave the guy the finger, and then he turned to me, spinning me around and slapping my behind. "Alright, get in the car."

I laughed, walking around to the front, but I stopped when I saw Tim lean down by his tire. "What?"

"Ray."

"What?" I asked again, walking back over to him and looking at the tire over his shoulder, only now noticing that the tire was flat. "Shit."

Tim stood, not saying anything. His face was red and his hands were wrapped up tight in a fist. He kicked the dirt on the ground and spun around, slamming his fist into his car door. "Damnit!"

"Hey, hey -" I grabbed his arms, pushing him against the car. "It's okay."

Tim's face was still red, but he didn't move. "Do you know how expensive tires are, kid? Real goddamn expensive!"

I glanced down at the tire and the back one that was flat too. I assumed the other two tired were also slashed. I sighed before I put my hands on his face. "Look, I'll call the shop and then maybe I'll see if you can get a discount." My hands left him and I shrugged. "Soda really likes me."

"Alright." Tim sighed, running a hand through his hair as he stared down at the tire. "Okay."

I nodded, walking over to the phone booth.

Shit, Ray. Ray Tanner sucked. Tim knew it was Ray, and even though Tim didn't know that I knew, I also knew it was Ray. And tires were expensive. I also knew that. Ray was out to get Tim - he was making that much obvious.

I waited for Tim to tell me about it, but he never did.

Once my phone call was over, I walked back to Tim. "They're on their way. And you can get ten percent off if you're not a total dick. Steve Randle's words, not mine." I laughed, trying to lighten the mood. When Tim didn't laugh, I asked, "You said Ray."

"What?"

"You think Ray did this?" Tim nodded and I pushed a little more. "Why?"

"He's been givin' me some trouble in the last week or two," Tim replied. He was leaning against the car and looking me in the eyes and I knew he was gonna tell me a little bit of the truth. "He came to me last week and asked me for somethin', said he needed to prove himself to other gangs and I could help him out."

"What'd he ask for?"

Tim stared at me intensely, pressing his lips against each other tightly. He reached out for me, pulling me closer by the loops in my jeans. "Somethin' I won't let him have."

I tried not to smile. I tried to be oblivious to what he was saying. He didn't know he was being sweet, but he was. I kissed him quite passionately, figuring he deserved it just then. When I pulled away, I ran my pointer finger over the bridge of his broken nose. "You're not gonna get in another fight, are ya?"

Tim looked down at me, shrugging. "If it comes to that."

I shook my head. "You're not gonna. I don't know how much longer that nose can hold up."

Tim chuckled, slapping me behind, making me squeal and giggle like a girl.

The truck from the shop did come, but by that time, I was already walking to my brother's.

I got there eventually, walking inside to see Paul, David and Molly already at the table. Molly put her hands on her hips, staring at me. "You're late."

I jogged to the table, sitting down beside Paul. "Sorry. Tim...Tim just - something happened."

"Something bad?" David question, reaching for his drink.

I shook my head. "Oh, no, nothing bad between us."

Paul snorted beside me. "Everything is bad between you two."

I reached over and pushed his head roughly, hoping it hurt him. "We're fine."

"Alright." Paul smirked, picking up his fork and twirling the spaghetti around it. "Do you _loooooooove_ him?" Paul started to tease me, making me groan. "Do you want to _maaaaaarrrryyy_ him?"

"Paul," I said tightly, turning to him. "If I want to marry Tim, that's none of your damn business."

Paul scoffed, boldly looking right at me. "As if someone would want to marry you."

"Speaking of marriage!" Molly said loudly, standing up suddenly. Everyone looked at her as she smiled very widely. "David proposed!" She held up her left hand, a tiny ring on her ring finger that I didn't notice before.

"Oh, shit," Paul said in a low voice, eyes widened at the ring.

My eyes were wide too, but I had managed to stand, running over to her and hugging her. "Oh, my god! Congratulations!" I pulled away from her, hugging a smiling David. "Congrats!"

Paul was hugging Molly when he said, "You know, Molly, you don't have to settle." That earned him a punch in the arm from David, but they both laughed and hugged each other. "Congratulations," Paul said genuinely.

David's arm came around Molly's shoulders, his face bright and happy. "Yeah, that's right. We're getting married. Probably around February."

"Maybe March," Molly added, smiling up at David. They kissed.

Paul sighed, and his arm came around my shoulders. "I was just joking earlier, Janey. Maybe you will get married one day. Maybe Tim'll find it in himself to want to stick with you forever."

I pushed his arm off of me. "I don't wanna talk about it," I said to him, walking back to my seat, noticing that David and Molly were gone.

"What's wrong?" Paul sat back down in his seat, going back to eating.

I shrugged. "Tim doesn't seem so serious about us. It's been almost a year and he still doesn't introduce me as his girl. He never talks about the future."

Paul shrugged, proving himself helpless, but they he said, "Tim's just that kind of guy, sis. Tim won't say he loves ya, but he does."

"How would I know if he's never told me?"

"He's never said that?"

"No," I said angrily and embarrassed.

Paul's eyebrows rose. "I've told a girl that I've loved her after three days."

I glared at him. "That's just because she made out with you and let you get to second base within twenty minutes of knowing her."

Paul smiled smugly, pointing his finger at me. "Exactly."

* * *

I spun around, Curly's arm around my shoulder, his other around Pony's. He spun, shouting the lyrics to the song, the cold beer in his hand touching my cheek. Curly was _shouting_ the lyrics, not singing. Pony and I were laughing really hard and my stomach was even hurting. Also, all three of us were drunk off our asses.

"More!" Curly yelled, holding up his empty beer bottle.

Pony grabbed it quickly, holding it over his head so Curly couldn't reach. Pony was really tall. "No way, man, you're off your rocker!"

Curly tried to reach for it, tripping over his feet and - "Whoa!" - falling to the ground. I laughed loudly, nearly falling over myself.

Everything was so dark, but I felt so light. My brain swung back and forth in my head and I liked it.

Pony bent over, laughing as well. The beer bottle slipped out of his hand as he tried to help Curly up. "Alright, I got you, buddy."

Curly giggled, going limp as Pony pulled him up. "I love you guys," he said, arms coming around us again. Curly kissed Pony's cheek before Pony could stop him and then Curly's lips came for me.

"Alright." A big hand pulled Curly away from me. Tim grabbed Curly's arm, putting it around his shoulders. "Let's get your drunk ass home, Curly."

"Hey, it's my big brother!" Curly smiled, pointing at Tim. "It's my big brother."

I moved to Curly's other side, putting his other arm around me too. "I can see." I giggled, looking at Tim over Curly's hanging head. "What a cutie."

Tim looked over at me. "God, you're smashed too, aren't you?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

We exited Bucks and I heard a loud smash. Soon, all of Curly was being pushed onto me and I saw Tim run off. I saw under the dim street lights that Tim was chasing after a group of people, some of Tim's gang joining him just a second later.

"I wonder what that was about," Pony slurred from behind me. He walked passed me, not helping me with Curly and he started to sway the closer we got to Tim's car. "Whoa, I feel..."

"Pony," I begged, Curly's weight depending on just me. "Help -"

Pony fell to the ground, eyes closed. He seemed to be passed out, but then he started to giggle. His hand found the dirt on the ground and he played with it with his fingers. "Oh, I love the world."

I laughed, the alcohol still swirling inside of me. Curly slid from me a little, making me grip Tim's car door frame. His window was unrolled, giving me something to grab onto. I let Curly slide the rest of the way out of my arms and onto the ground. I leaned up, feeling a sharp pain in my hand. I held it to my face, seeing a small piece of glass wedged into my palm.

Oh, shit.

Tim's window wasn't unrolled, it was broken. Oh no. And he had just gotten new and expensive tires. Now he needed to get his windows replaced. Ray was such an asshole.

"Whoa," Curly said loudly from the ground, wiping a thick drop of blood from his face.

I took a step back, holding my bloody hand out. "What do I do?" I asked desperately, starting to panic.

"I don't know," Curly said frantically.

Pony was still giggling on the ground. "This was a really good night, guys."

I started breathing heavily, staring at the blood dripping from my hand, the pain increasing as I sobered up more and more. "Do I pull it out, what do I -" My eyes weren't closed, but the corners or my eyes started to look black. Soon, the darkness covered my whole eyes and I was confused. "Guys, what should I -" I felt nothing for what seemed like two seconds. I came to, my chin hurting and my hand nearly numb.

Pony was lying down about twenty feet away, up against Tim's car. That was when I realized that I was leaning up against Bucks, further away. I was about to stand when I saw Curly beside me.

"Curly..." I started to say. Curly was punched in the face, although he was already unconscious. I screamed, scurrying backward. I didn't get very far, being grabbed by the front of my shirt and yanked upward to meet Brent from Ray's gang.

"Nice to see you again, Jane," he said to me, nasty smile on his face.

I tried to pry his hands off of me, but he did so himself, pushing me harshly. And when I tried to lean up again, he had punched me in the face. I tiredly lied on the ground, my head pounding and my chin hurting. I blinked rapidly, my vision blurry.

The sounds of fist hitting bone was painful and made me sob on the ground

"Brent, let's go!" some guys yelled.

Brent, thankfully, left. He left me with one last kick, running off and away from Bucks.

I cried for a couple more seconds, moving only slight, feeling the aches in my body. I managed to switch my head so that my other cheek was resting on the ground. I looked over at Curly, who was still sitting up against the building. His head was down, but I could see the blood dripping from his nose and mouth. It was everywhere - all over his face, shirt, pants, shoes and ground.

"Curly," I whispered, getting no response. I leaned up, crawling over to Curly and getting on my knees. I reached out and grabbed his face.

Curly was almost unrecognizable. His face was covered with blood and it was all puffy and purple. A tooth on his bottom set of teeth was hanging loosely over his lip. His neck was all bruised up and his arm was bent at a weird angle.

I grabbed the front of his shirt, shaking him. "Curly! Curly, wake up!" I sobbed, shaking him violently, desperate for him to wake up. "Curly!" I cried, letting go of him and managing to stand. I ignored every pain in my body and I walked over to the street. I walked past a seemingly unharmed Pony, noticing that no one else was around. As I walked down the road, I also noticed the sun peaking up in the distance.

I made it to a telephone booth a little ways away, pulling a dime out of the jeans and pushing it into the slot. My shaky finger pressed those three buttons and it started to ring.

 _"911, what's your emergency?'_

I breathed out. "I'm down at Buck Merrill's place. There's been a fight. He's gonna die. He's gonna -"

 _"Ma'am, I need you to tell me exactly where you are."_

"I'm at Bucks Bar and he's gonna die. Shepard," I said, feeling my legs start to shake. "Hurry please."

 _"Ma'am -"_

"Please," I begged, falling backward onto the ground. My back hit the hard road and I looked up to see the phone swinging back and forth. There was a voice coming from it, but there was no way in hell I could find the energy to get it.

Tulsa had never seemed so empty before. It must've been real early in the morning. There we no people and no cars at all - not even men gettin' going to work. The only people around were me at the phone booth, Pony at Tim's car, and Curly against Bucks. I didn't know where Tim was. I didn't know where Buck Merrill was. I didn't know where anyone was.

All I knew is that I was tired and I was sad. I forced myself to stay up until I heard sirens in the distance. Only then did I allow myself to fall into a deep sleep.

* * *

I sat up in the bed quickly, paying no mind to my spinning head. I looked around the room, recognizing it quickly as a hospital. I seethed, looking down at my hand, a nurse wrapping it up in some thick gauze. "Uh -" My voice was cracked and dry. My throat hurt.

"Would you like some water?"

I stared at the old woman. "What I would like is to know where Curly Shepard is."

She shook her head. "I can't speak about that with you at this moment."

"Why not? Is he okay?"

"Your other friend is waiting outside for you. He seems untouched."

"Good." I sighed in relief, thankful for one person being okay. "And you can't tell me anything about Curly Shepard?"

The woman finished fixing the gauze up. "Why don't you just lie back and rest up. You lost quite a bit of blood."

"From my hand?" I held my hand up, assessing the pain. "It doesn't seem that bad."

"From you head, nose, and hand." The woman walked closer to the door. "I will be back."

"Have you contacted my mother?" I asked her before she could walk out.

Her eyebrows rose. "You're 18, are you not?"

"Oh," I said aloud, putting the pieces together that I was old enough to not have to tell my mother everything. "Right." I leaned back on the bed like I was going to relax and I waited for the nurse to be gone. I stood up very quickly, grabbing my jacket and slipping it on, walking outside into the hallway.

"Jane."

I looked to my side, seeing Pony sitting in a seat. He stood and I hugged him tightly. "Pony." I sighed, feeling his strong arms wrap around me just as tight. "You're okay."

Pony pulled away, taking my hand in his. "You're not."

"I'm fine," I reassured.

Pony gave me a serious look. "Jane, you managed to wake up from being passed out and walk a mile to the nearest phone."

A mile? It didn't seem that far.

I shook my head. "No, I didn't -"

"Jane, Curly could've died," Pony said heavily, his hands landing on my shoulders. "You probably saved his life."

I shook my head, not liking the sound of that. "No, I'm not a hero. I just called the police." I wanted to change the subject as quick as possible. "Have you heard anything about Curly? Is he okay?"

Pony sighed, shaking his head. "They haven't told me anything and they won't talk about it anywhere near me."

I looked around, figuring we were probably in the wrong hallway, or at least on the wrong end of it. "Let's go." I started to walk, Pony quickly grabbing my arm.

"What do you think you're doing?"

I turned to him, brows furrowed. "To find Curly."

"You need to rest and -"

"I need to find Curly," I said, very determined. I stared Pony in the eyes until he gave up and we both walked down the hallways, peeking into a bunch of different rooms before we landed in one with a curly-headed kid in one bed.

Curly's face was less puffy, but more purple and blue and yellow than I had ever seen before. He had something on his nose and another thing and a cast around his arm. His hair was crazier than usually, making him look almost sickly - as if the black eyes, chapped lips and pale complexion weren't sickly enough.

"Holy shit," Pony whispered from behind me.

I walked closer with caution, feeling my eyes start to tear up. I couldn't help but the have a wave of sadness overcome me. All of this was my fault. Everything that was happening was completely and totally my fault. Everything with Tim -

"Tim!" I spun around to Pony. "Does Tim know Curly's here?"

Pony nodded. "I called him about an three hours ago."

I nodded, turning back to Curly. I touched his arm cautiously, looking at his face damaged face. "He's gonna live, isn't he?"

"He has to."

I tried to hold it in, but I couldn't help but to sob, my knees shaking. I gripped the side of the hospital bed, kneeling and pressing my forehead agains the side rails of the bed. "This is all my fault," I vocalized through another sob. "This is -"

"Hey, hey -" Pony's soft voice and strong arms were starting to calm me down. He grabbed my arm, pulling me away from Curly. "None of this is your fault. This is Ray."

"The only reason Ray gives a shit about the Shepards is because of me! God, and this thing with Tim. It's about me and that's why this is happening."

"Wait, what?"

I looked at Pony. "Ray wants to take me from Tim. He feels like he needs to prove himself, you know, showing he can take something from other people. He said he wouldn't stop until Tim gave up. The tires, windows and Curly - it's all Ray." I sighed, sitting down in the nearest seat. "Maybe I should just go with Ray."

Pony shook his head. "No. Come on, Jane, we can figure this out."

I nodded lightly, glancing over at Curly. I groaned, putting my face in my hands. "Jesus. This is all so fucked up."

Pony opened his mouth to say something, but he was cutoff by the door opening.

At first I thought it was a nurse or a doctor, but it wasn't.

Tim strode across the room within the second, right to Curly's bedside. He stared at Curly for a couple really long seconds before he turned to us, face red and eyes angry. "What happened?"

"We have no idea," Pony answered for me.

Tim's eyes fell on me, scaring me a little. "Jane?" His voice was tight and he was the angriest I had probably ever seen him.

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"How do you not know?" Tim yelled. "Where the hell were you when my brother was gettin' beat?"

Pony put his hand on Tim's chest and pushed him away from me. "Hey! Jane was passed out, Tim, how could she have done anything?"

Tim growled, pointing a finger at Curly. "My brother almost died and no one knows what happened."

"Brent was the one who beat him up," I said softly, scared to speak as loud at Tim was. "I don't know where Ray was."

"He was with me," Tim answered, voice still loud. He ran a hand through his hair, starting to pace. "If I had just looked around sooner."

"Pony," I said, turning to Pony, glancing at Tim. "Could you give us a second?"

Pony looked at Tim skeptically before walking past me. He squeezed my arm comfortingly before walking out the door.

I walked closer to Tim. "Tim, I -"

"Don't," he said to me, still pacing. "Where were you when this was happening?"

"I was right next to him."

"And you didn't stop it?"

I didn't know if Tim had noticed or not, but I was a little bruised as well. I had passed out. I couldn't help it. Or maybe I could have. Shit. I could've done something. Well, it was a little late now, but there was still something I could do. But should I -

"Jane!"

"Huh?"

"Are you listening to me?"

I nodded quickly. "Yes."

"Tell me more about the night!" He was yelling now for no reason. He was irrationally angry because someone he loved was hurt. I knew he couldn't help it, but I really didn't like the yelling.

"Why are you yelling at me?" I asked, my own voice rising.

"Why aren't you paying attention?" he screamed.

I felt the hotness in my body. "Why are you being such an asshole?"

Tim's hand rose quickly and he didn't even notice until I had flinched. His hand fell and he looked less red than before. He sighed and his hands reached out for me once more. The look on his face told me that he had finally noticed my wrapped up hand and bandaged face.

I backed away from him, breathing heavily. I watched him as the doorknob poked into my side. I grabbed it and turned it. "I think I need some space," I said to him, opening the door and running out.

"Jane!" Pony called from behind me.

"I'm going home!" I yelled back, going right out the doors, ignoring the yells of Pony and some nurses somewhere behind me.

* * *

As soon as the door opened, I slapped him. "You asshole! You could've killed him!" My arms were swinging.

Ray ducked, laughing to himself. "Hey, hey, it was Brent who did it, baby." He grabbed my swinging hand, pulling me to him. "Alright, why are you here?"

I looked him in the eyes, yanking my arm away from him. "I want to get back together."

"Oh, Jane," Ray sang lowly, smirking widely. "You want to protect your boyfriend."

"Not my boyfriend."

"He tell you?"

"He didn't have to," I said to him.

Ray continued to smirk, reaching out and touching my cheek. "You're a smart girl, Jane, and I need you by my side. Can you do that?"

"Will you give this shit up?"

"Yes."

Ray stared me down. "Close the door."

I didn't turn around, pressing my body against the door to close it. When I heard the click, I sighed. "Now what?"

"Take off your clothes."

It was simple and it was painful. But as long as I was with Ray, no one else would have to get hurt. I could protect Curly. I could protect Tim.


	13. Chapter 13

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 13:

* * *

"Jane!"

My head popped up and I sighed when I saw Ray standing at the end of the bed. I wrapped the covers around me tightly, pressing my head back down on the pillow. "What?"

"I'm going out. You comin' or not?"

"Not."

"Well, we're goin' out tonight, so be ready by then."

I nodded lightly, eyes closed. "Okay."

It had been two days since the incident, and I hadn't left Ray's shitty apartment in that time. I came to his apartment, got back together with him and then crawled into his bed. I hadn't gotten out of it yet. I hadn't been to work and I realized that I probably just lost my job. I also hadn't went to school and I also realized I just ruined any chance I had at getting an A in chemistry.

But I was going to.

I threw the covers off of me, feeling the ache of my body as I walked to Ray's closet. I grabbed one of his flannels, slipping it on and starting towards the door. I left the apartment and walked a little down into the first floor, where the only phone in the whole building was.

I picked it up and dialled my home number, hoping for anyone but my mother.

 _"Hello?"_

"It's me."

 _"Jesus, Janey, are you nuts?!"_ Paul didn't sound glad to hear from me. _"I had to hear from Pony that you got up and_ _left the hospital. How was I supposed to know if you were dead or not? Why didn't you call? Why didn't you tell me?"_ I didn't get a chance to answer, as Paul started asking more questions. _"Where did you go? Where are you now? I'll come get you."_

"I'm nowhere," I told him, not sure what even I was thinking at that point. "But I might be here for a while."

 _"Who are you with?"_

"Why does it matter?"

 _"It's not Tim. He came by looking for you."_

I perked up, gripping the phone tightly. "He did. What did he say?"

 _"Says you said some dumb shit and he needs some explainin'."_

I held back everything I wanted to say, instead I said, "Next time you see him tell him that I meant what I said and he won't be seeing any of me anymore."

 _"What, you guys done?"_

I sighed sadly. "Yeah."

 _"What'd he do?"_ Paul asked, and I was sure his face was turning red.

"Nothin'," I said defensively.

 _"What'd **you** do?"_

I shook my head, rubbing my face as I temporarily took the phone away from me. I put the phone back against my ear, ready for the conversation to be over. "Just tell mom that I'm really upset over this breakup and I need to support of my friends."

 _"What friends?"_

I wanted to smack him. "Fine. Friend, singular. Tell her I'm at Pony's."

 _"When you comin' home?"_

"Maybe in a couple days," I said, really talking out my ass.

 _"Fine."_ Paul sighed on the other line. _"Call me soon, okay?"_

"Okay."

 _"Bye."_

I hung up, walking back up the stairs and starting to get actually ready to go out. I managed to brush my hair and tuck one of Ray's tightest shirts into my tight jeans. I looked fine, I thought.

Ray's face when he saw me told me he wasn't impressed, but he didn't make an effort to tell me. He just put his arm around me and took me to his car, where we drove to a new bar in town.

I missed Bucks.

The new bar's lighting was red and the space was spacious. It did have a pool table, though. It was alright. It was just a place where they didn't have to deal with any other gangs probably.

I had to walk around with Ray's arm around me, hand on my butt. I had to smile at all the people he introduced me to and act like I was really enjoying myself. But by the time we got to the seventh person, I was tired.

"...And this is my girl. Jane, this is Joey."

I nodded to him unenthusiastically. "Hey."

Ray laughed, smacking my backside. "She's a little tired from earlier. You wanna go home, baby?"

I almost started smiling at him. "Yeah."

Ray smirked, smacking my backside again. "Then go home. And put some beer in the fridge for later."

I turned away from him, walking out onto the street, angrily kicking a nearby pebble. I groaned loudly, turning and kicking the wall of the building. I had just been so angry lately.

I walked to the nearest group of boys. They were younger than I was - probably sixteen or fifteen. I reached them, looking over all of them. "You guys got a cigarette?"

The shortest one smirked. "If you lift up your shirt, we'll give you one."

I narrowed my eyes at him, taking a step closer. "You'll give me one either way." I looked down at him, pushing him by the chest. "Now."

He chuckled to his friends, trying to seem tough, but he took out a pack of cigarettes and gave me one. "There you go, sweetheart."

I grabbed it, letting him light it. I took a puff, feeling my body instantly relax and I hadn't realized how much I missed them. I smiled, looking over at the shortest one again. "Thank you." I turned around, walking off down the street.

I made it back to the apartment alive, still savouring my one and only cigarette, though I was sure I would find a couple packs in Ray's apartment. I did and I started smoking one, lying on his bed, staring up at the ceiling.

I wondered how Curly was doing. I wondered where Tim was.

I finished my other cigarette and I searched around for more, misplacing the pack somewhere in the room. I opened up Ray's bedside table, seeing a pack of expertly rolled joints. I stared at them for a couple of seconds before I opened it up, taking one out and putting it in my mouth. I lit it with a barely working lighter and took a long drag.

Last time I smoked a joint was when I was fourteen, and I had only managed to get in two puffs before Paul saw me and pushed me around. He yelled at me that what was his was his and not mine.

I smiled at the memory, lying back down on the bed. I smoked the whole thing - and then another one and the the last one.

Time floated by, just as I was floating all over the room. I felt hot and happy and hungry. The clock read 3 in the morning before I knew it and I sleeping off a high I very much enjoyed.

"Jane!"

My head popped up and I sighed when I saw Ray standing at the end of the bed. I got a sense of deja-vu as I wrapped the covers around me tightly, pressing my head back down on the pillow. "What?"

"Get up!" Ray threw the covers off of me, grabbing one of my ankles and yanking me off the bed.

I seethed as I hit the wood. I looked up at him from the ground. "What the fuck do you want?"

Ray pointed an angry finger at me. "You're my girl now, alright? So act like it."

My brows furrowed, looking him in his glazed over eyes. "Jesus, you're wired, aren't you?"

He grabbed the front of my shirt, yanking me up, pressing his nose against mine. "That's none of your damn business."

I clawed at his face defensively, feeling his grip getting tighter., and he let go. "Don't touch me," I snarled, taking a step back.

Ray's big hand came up before I even knew it and he smacked me hard across my face. When I fell to the ground, he leaned down and put his blade against my cheek. "You want to scratch me, huh?" He pushed the blade down, sliding it about an inch across my cheek.

I determined not the scream, pressed my lips together hard until it was over. Then I groaned loudly, touching my cheek to get a bunch of blood on my fingers. I ignored the stung and I stood, not grabbing anything as I walked to the door.

"Where the hell do you think you're going?"

I didn't answer, slamming the door behind me.

* * *

I walked up to the front desk. "Uh, Curly Shepard?"

"Oh, yes, it's -" She looked up and gasped. "Oh, my goodness! Are you alright?"

"What?" I asked, a little confused. And then it clicked and I gestured to my face. "Oh, no, it's just that tag football gets a little rough with my brothers."

She hesitated before nodding. "Alright. Curly Shepard is in room 104."

"Thank you," I said, walking past her and down the hallway until I reached the room. I reached for the doorknob and opened it as quietly as I could. I peeked in to see if Tim was there, but Pony was instead. "Hey," I said, walking inside and closing the door behind me.

Pony stared at Curly. "Hey." He was sitting in a chair beside Curly's bed and Curly was sleeping.

"How is he doing?"

The bandage was still on his nose and his hair was still crazily messy. His arm was now is a cast and there were tubes coming from different places on his body.

Pony sighed. "He's gonna live, but that arm of his is gonna be broken for a long time and that nose too. They say it's a literal miracle he didn't have worse."

I nodded, grabbing a chair and setting up beside him. I sat down, glancing at the book in his lap. "Homework?"

"Not that you would know," Pony said bitterly. "You haven't been at school in days. Where have you -" His gaze had shifted to me a second ago and he took it to register what he was seeing. "Jesus, Jane!" He reached out and took my chin between his fingers, turning to my face side to side. "What happened?"

I winced, his finger on a small bruise on my chin. I looked him in his searching eyes and I didn't speak until he looked in mine. "I got back together with Ray."

Pony let go of me, shaking his head. "Why the hell would you do that?"

I shrugged. "I love him."

"No, you don't."

I stood, not feeling like I could even begin to explain with my amount of energy. "I don't have to explain myself to you."

Pony grabbed my arm to stop me. "Jane, you're doing this for some reason. Tell me what it is." His eyes widened. "You got back with him to stop him from doing anything else. Jane, you don't have to do that. Tim can handle it."

I sighed, shaking him off gently. "Just don't tell anyone right now," I said, stepping closer and wrapping my arms around him. "Let me figure it out, okay?"

Pony hugged me back. "You really think you have to do this?"

"Yes."

He grabbed my arms, pulling me away from him to look me in the eyes. "Take care of yourself, Jane."

I nodded, kissing his cheek before walking into the hallway. I glanced down the hall before I turned to walk towards the door. I looked back quickly when I noticed that Tim was at the very end of the hallway, looking down at two huge cinnamon rolls. I bolted it out of there, not hearing any yelling from behind me.

I had made it out without Tim seeing me.

I sighed in relief, walking down the street, missing the turn to Ray's. I was gonna go home to get my stuff first.

I made it there, walking inside. The lights were out and no one seemed to be home, so I took my time packing my stuff up. I didn't take everything of course, but I got the clothes I wore the most and a couple of things just for me to do, plus my pillow.

I walked out of the house within the hour, bag slung over my shoulder, pillow under my arm. I made it to Ray's not quickly at all, opening the door and heading up the stairs. When I made it to Ray's door, I hesitated and pressed my ear against the door. I could hear him shuffling around inside.

I opened the door and walked inside, tossing my bag on the floor and my pillow on the bed. I started taking off my clothes to put my pyjamas on, not looking at Ray quite yet.

"Jane."

I looked up at him while pulling my pants on. "What?"

He was sitting in a chair at the dining room table not too far away. "I didn't mean to hit you that hard, but you shouldn't provoke me."

I nodded, pulling my shirt over my head. "Okay."

"Okay." Ray stood, walking over to me and putting his hands on my hips. He pulled me to face him, looking my face over. "You should start wearing makeup."

I ignored that comment, instead asking, "When did you get into drugs?"

Ray touched my face casually, as if we were talking about our days. "About a year ago."

"While we were seeing each other?"

"Just after."

"Just weed?"

Ray shrugged. "Blow sometimes."

"Jesus."

"It is what it is." He chuckled, kissing my cheek sensually. His arms came around me and his wet lips made way to my neck.

Though I wasn't in the mood - not that I ever was with Ray, I wrapped my arms around his neck. "Are you gonna give me rides to school?"

"What do you think?"

"Just thought I'd ask."

"Well, stop talking," Ray muttered, pushing me down on the bed.


	14. Chapter 14

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 14:

* * *

"Please, Ray!"

Ray sighed, glaring at me. "Who's going?"

"Just Pony," I said, not liking how nervous I was lying to his face. I sighed. "And his brother Soda. And his brother's friend Steve. And possibly another guy named Two-bit."

"That sounds like a lot of guys."

"What do you think I'm gonna do?" I asked him, earning raised eyebrows. I shot him a sharp look. "I don't go around givin' it to anyone. When I'm with someone, I'm with someone."

"And you're with me," Ray said strongly.

I nodded after a second. "Sure."

" _Sure_?" He stepped closer, voice lowering.

I took a step back, not looking him in the eyes. "Yes."

Ray started to smirk. "Yes." He kissed my cheek and then kissed my lips, patting my butt and walking around me. "Alright, you can go."

I hid my smile. "Okay." I walked over to the closet, grabbing my bag of already packed clothes and running to the door before he could change his mind. I ran out of the apartment building and into the car in the parking lot. "Hey!"

Pony smiled, starting the car. "Hey."

I looked in the back at the sleeping bags and rolled up tent. "Seems like a lot of stuff, Pone."

"All the boys are in another car," Pony said, pulling onto the road for our journey. "They dumped their stuff with me."

"I'm so excited," I said, not afraid to show it. "This band is gonna be great and I haven't been camping in so long."

Pony smiled sideways at me. "I'm glad." The smile fell from his face and he adjusted his grip on the wheel. "How's Ray treating' you?'

I smiled and shrugged. "Like usual." I subconsciously touched my face, rubbing at the powder makeup. "I don't know, he's...he's Ray, you know."

"When are you gonna come back?"

"To what?"

Pony shrugged. "I don't know. Home?"

"I'm in Tulsa, Pony," I said back. "I haven't gone anywhere."

"Jane -"

I shook my head. "I don't want to talk about this, okay?" I waited for Pony to nod before I said, "Let's just forget about everything and go camping, okay?"

Pony sighed and nodded.

We sat in comfortable silence for most of the ride, but when we got there, we were both so excited and we couldn't stop talking about everything. I

There was a stage at the edge of the forest, in front of a big opened where people were throwing down big blankets and smoking up and having fun. There were trails and trails that led off to a bunch of empty camping spots, benches everywhere. We all set up camp, Pony and I separate from the rest of the boys, but not too far. We set up our tent and unrolled our sleeping bags and then we all went down to the stage and set up our own blankets.

"This is amazing," I said, lying down on the blanket and looking up at the sky. I sat up, smiling widely and looking around. "Everyone is so different here. I kinda want to take my shirt off."

Pony looked at me. "Please don't."

I laughed, sighing and closing my eyes. I was smoking up the sun when I suddenly felt cold. "Hey -" I opened my eyes to see someone blocking my light.

The guy with the long hair smiled. "Hi. My name's Blue and this is my sister Luna." He gestured to a very pretty girl beside him, minimal clothing and long blonde hair. He looked down at me. "We couldn't help but notice you guys didn't have a flag."

Pony took a large, peace-sign flag from the pretty blonde. "Uh, thank you." And she smiled at him, blush on both of their cheeks.

I looked back at the man as he helped me to stand. Once I was standing, I introduced myself. "My name's Jane."

He nodded, leaning forward and kissing my cheek. I tensed, but he didn't care. He then hugged me, his beard scratching up against my cheek. "It's nice to meet you, Jane."

He was kind of cute. He probably had a really nice face underneath that short beard of his. His brown hair was a little longer than his shoulders and definitely unwashed, but he had the prettiest blue eyes and the softest lips.

I smiled at the man - Blue. "Maybe we'll see you around."

Luna looked at me. "We're having a get together after the concert over at our campsite."

"Yes," Pony said quickly, coughing afterwards, his face turning a bright shade of red. He was looking at her legs and at her smile. "Yeah, we'd love to."

She smiled. "Great." She started to back away, throwing up a peace sign. "See you there."

I nodded to Blue. "See you there."

They walked away.

I nudged Pony's arm. "You gonna get that?"

Pony looked at me with a disgusted expression. "You sound like Curly."

I chuckled. "You're such a virgin."

Pony's mouth fell open a little bit and then he tried to conceal his shock. "Wha - how'd you - how do you know I'm _not_ a virgin."

"Look, Pony," I said softly, placing my arm around him. "You're a total fox, girls flirt with you all the time, but you're always turning them down, whether you know it or not. The fact that you've never gotten any is entirely your fault." I smiled at him. "Luna seems nice."

Pony pushed my shoulder and both of us laughed.

The band started to play soon after at they were great. People were waving their hands and kissing and having fun. The atmosphere was amazing. The vibes were positive. And I was having the most fun since I walked out of that hospital.

The concert was over once it got dark, though they did play a few more song the crowd insisted on. Then the band was taking putting away their equipment and joining all of their fans by the stage to talk and smoke up.

Pony and I made our way to the campfire, Pony a little too eager.

Blue and Luna's campsite was nicer than ours and they had a bigger tent than us. There were people all over the place - the ground, standing up, on the benches, everywhere. Each one of them had a smile on there face and a peace sign flag tied around some part of their body.

"Jane!" Blue made his way over to us. "Ponyboy." He hugged Pony and then me, smiling widely when he leaned away. "You made it."

I smiled at him, not being able to help it. "We did."

Blue pointed to a place I didn't care to look. "Luna is over there. She hasn't stopped talking about you, man."

Pony smiled. "Really?"

I nudged him. "Go."

Pony didn't have to be asked twice and he walked off to where I saw the leggy blonde.

"Wanna hit?" Blue held out a joint to me. I hadn't even noticed it there before, but he shook it a little. "I'm a sharer."

I took the joint, smirking at him. "I'm sure you are."

He didn't seem to notice my advances that much and he watched me take a puff. "Where are you from?"

"Tulsa, Oklahoma," I answered, handing the joint back to him. "You?"

"The earth is my home," he said, turning around and walking closer to the fire.

"Okay." I laughed. "Well, where were you born?"

Blue smiled at me over his broad shoulder. "This very tent." He stopped in front of the tent and smiled at him. "In this very spot."

"Wow."

"Yes."

We unzipped the door to it and sat inside, legs outside of the tent, the rest of our bodies inside and Blue was still smoking his weed.

"Is your name really Blue?" I asked curiously.

Blue nodded. "That is my birth name, yes."

My eyebrows rose. "Huh." I then smiled. "Still not as weird as the name Ponyboy. He has a brother called Sodapop too. And another brother, but his name's Daryl."

"What about you?"

"Huh?"

"Brothers and sisters?

"David and Paul," I said to him, looking down at my lap. "They're good ones. What about you?"

"Well, my sister Luna..." He paused, looking over at his sister. "And three more sisters and two brothers."

My eyes widened, staring at him. "That's seven kids."

Blue smiled. "More love to go around."

I laughed. "Everything that comes out of your mouth is ridiculous."

Blue shook his head, tossing his already finished joint and grabbing my hand gently. He held it, palm open to him and he stared at it. He rubbed my hand, stirring a warmness inside of me.

 _Tim looked over at me, still rubbing my hand. "What?"_

 _I smiled at him. "Nothin'."_

"I see a lot of emotional distress," Blue said, sounding concerned.

I scoffed. "You're a palm reader?"

"You body will tell you anything if you let it," he said, still looking down at my hand. "You think realistically." He looked up into my eyes. "Not much of a dreamer?"

I shook my head. "No."

He looked back down at my hand, running the tip of his finger along it lightly. "There's a sudden change in lifestyle."

I gave him a look once he looked up at me. "Okay, you did not get that from my hand."

Blue smiled, setting down my right hand and picking up my other one. "You have very intense feelings and you're very intelligent." He paused, smiling at my hand. "You have a soulmate and you've already found them."

I yanked my hand away, wiping it on my jeans. "Okay, you definitely did not get that one from my hand."

"I can see it in your eyes."

I was just staring at him, trying to convince myself that hippies weren't just doped up lovers that walked around without shoes. "So what?"

"You're not with him now, are you?"

I sighed, looking away. "No."

"Why not?"

"It's a long story and I don't feel like talking about it." I turned back to him, looking Blue over. "You kind of remind me of him. If Tim had a beard, maybe..." I started laughing at the thought of Tim ever having a beard.

"You should go to him," Blue said.

I smiled a little. "Where I come from, _spreading the love_ isn't exactly widely accepted."

"What's so wrong with loving someone? It's just two bodies appreciating each other."

I looked his face over, deciding that I could manage to kiss that beard. I leaned forward, pressing my lips against his. I put my leg over his, crawling into his lap. The thin shorts he was wearing allowed me to feel everything I was getting myself into and I wanted it.

His hands ran over my body lovingly, so unlike Ray, so much like Tim. My eyes were closed at Blue continued to touch me everywhere. I imagined in my mind that Blue didn't have a beard or long hair. Instead, he had greased back brown hair, a scar on his cheek, and a broken nose. He wasn't perfect, but I loved him.

We fell back into the tent and I broke away for just a second to zip it up before I returned to his arms.

* * *

I had spent the whole rest of the weekend with Blue, Luna and Pony. All of us hung around together and Pony and I watched as Blue and Luna showed their love to every single person at the camp. By the time Sunday rolled around, Pony and I packed up our stuff and we heading back to Tulsa in the car.

My head was against the window and I was exhausted. "That was a great weekend."

Pony smiled. "Yeah."

"It's too bad they don't have phones or even an address, really." I didn't want to kiss Blue again, but I liked talking to him. He probably would've turned into a really good friend.

"Yeah."

I looked over at Pony. "What's up with you?"

"Nothin'." Pony shrugged, not able to wipe the smile off his face long enough. He just kept smiling. "Nothin, I just...it was a great weekend?"

My mouth fell open and my eyes widened. "You spent the night with Luna, didn't you?"

Pony laughed bashfully. "I don't know."

I laughed loudly, punching his arm. "Oh, my god!"

Pony smiled widely, looking over at me. "Don't pretend you didn't do the same!"

"Luna's not exactly my type, Pony."

Pony laughed. "With Blue, Jane."

I nodded, my laughter fading. "He was real nice."

Pony's laughter faded too and he sighed. "Now back to Tulsa."

"I wish we could live there forever," I confessed after a minute of silence. "Just set up a tent and never go back."

Pony smirked. "But who would take care of Curly?"

I smiled. "How's he doin'?"

"Good." Pony nodded. "He should be out next week or somethin'."

"How's Tim?" I asked, not being able to help myself.

Pony looked at the road, his hand tightening around the wheel. "He doesn't say anything to me. He doesn't say much at all. He just kinda went back to the person he was a couple years ago." He glanced at me. "Why haven't you at least gone to see him, Jane?" I shook my head, signalling that I simply didn't want to talk about it and Pony sighed again. "Well, are you comin' to school tomorrow?"

I shook my head again. "Probably not."

"Why not?"

"I don't have a ride and I don't feel like walking."

"Maybe I can convince Soda to let me use the car tomorrow."

I shrugged. "Okay."

Pony smiled slightly. "Okay."

* * *

The whole school day went by without question of my face. The rumour mill spun and people said that I was just that girl that is always fighting someone and that it was nothing new at all. My teachers didn't notice I was there, just like they probably didn't notice I was gone.

Everyone except for Mr. Ryans, who couldn't at all let me just walk out of his classroom.

"Jane."

I stopped at the door, watching Pony keep walking down the hall, giving me a glance over his shoulder. I walked backward into the classroom for a couple steps before turning around and facing Ryans at his desk. "Yeah."

He leaned back in his chair. "What happened?" he asked, gesturing slightly to my face.

I sat down on top of a desk. "Whatever everyone is saying happened."

Ryans leaned up and folded his hands on top of his desk. "Look, Jane, what I called you in for is to tell you that you're failing my class. Not by a lot, but your attendance certainly hasn't helped."

I groaned. "Shit."

"I don't get it, Jane," he said, brows furrowed at me. "You're one of the smartest students I've ever had in my class. You clearly understand that material. But you don't apply yourself." He managed to get closer. "But you can do a final essay to bring up your mark before this semester ends."

I nodded, feeling the wrath of my mother already. "Sure."

"And let me enter you story, okay? It will help your grade and your future. The deadline is next week. What do you -"

"I don't care," I told him, pushing myself off the desk and walking toward the door, suddenly in the worst mood.

"Wha - Jane?"

I turned back to look at him. "That story doesn't compare to the hell my life is now, so I don't even care if you want to put it into some huge competition." I reached for the doorknob and angrily yanked the door open. I stomped down the hall, right past Pony.

"Whoa - Jane - Jane!"

I jogged toward the door and down the steps. "Go away, Pony."

He grabbed my arm, making me whirl around. He wasn't the sweet-faced Pony he usually was at that moment. He was angry, face red and grip tight. "When are you gonna smarten up and drop Ray?"

"When there's no threat to Curly's life!" I whisper-yelled, glancing around and everyone looking at us.

"You can't protect everyone, Jane!"

I was angry at Pony because he was right. And I was angry at myself for being so stupid because now I couldn't turn back. Breaking up with Ray would be more trouble than it was worth now. I couldn't risk anyone getting hurt because of something I did, so I was just gonna have to accept that this was my life.

I glanced over my shoulder at Ray's car not too far away. "I have to go, Pony."

There was an ugly snarl on his face that I had never seen. "You're scared. You can't stick up for yourself against Ray Tanner. Do you even want to live?" When I ignored him and started to walk away, he yanked me back. "You're weak, Jane, and you're pathetic."

I knew he was just mad that I wasn't treating myself well enough. Well, I learned that later on, but in that moment, his words were hurting me too much for me to make sense of anything.

I threw my fist back and then forward, hitting him in the face. I watched him fall onto his back on the ground, reaching up and holding his nose with a look of surprise on his face. "Pony..." I started, feeling regretful.

Pony stood, pulling his hand away to reveal a bleeding nose. His look of surprise turned into something else and he ran into me, arms wrapped around me. He knocked me down and we started to roll around on the ground.

"Hey, hey!" the principle's loud voice came closer and closer until I was easily yanked off of Pony. "That is enough!"

I shook the principle off quickly and fixed my jacket. I gathered the saliva in my mouth and spit the bloody spit onto the ground, feeling the stinging on my lip. I walked around Pony, who was still on the ground, and I went to the parking lot. I got inside of Ray's car and told him to drive.

"Jesus, what happened?"

I quickly wiped away a falling tear, turning away from him. "Nothing."


	15. Chapter 15

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 15:

* * *

I pulled the shirt over my head, turning toward Ray and holding my arms out. "Yeah?"

"Too much chest." I put on a different shirt and did the same thing. Ray shook his head again. "Not enough chest."

I sighed, putting out a shirt I was sure was a happy medium. "What about this one?"

Ray nodded. "That's the one."

I looked in the mirror at the tight shirt, sculpting my waist and pushing on my breasts. "Why do I have to dress up?"

Ray smirked, eyes scanning my body. "The guy I'm meeting likes to have something to look at."

"Lovely," I muttered, falling onto the bed. "When are we leavin'?"

Ray put a cigarette in his mouth and started walking toward the door. "Hold on." He walked out, leaving me in his apartment alone.

"We're goin' now." Brent, almost as tall as the doorway, stood still, staring at me. "What are you wearing?"

I stood quickly, grabbing a jacket. I didn't like the way he was looking at me. "Nothing."

Brent stepped closer, a non comforting smile making way to his face. "You're lookin' like a real fox, Jane."

"Thanks -" His hands found my arms, grabbing them. I gasped at the sudden contact, looking up at him. "Brent -"

His hands left my arms, going to my sides and then around to my back. He stepped closer, his body then against mine. "You are a pretty one, aren't ya?"

I froze up, feeling his hand rubbing my behind over my jeans. "Brent -"

He pushed me down on the bed and crawled over me. "Be quiet."

I screamed, being the opposite of quiet, to which Brent put a hand over my mouth. I tried to push him away, but he was just so big. He managed to get the button to my jeans undone before Ray walked in.

"Hey!" Ray yelled, snapping his fingers. He didn't even move from the doorway. He just looked at Brent, but that was it. "Give her a break, man. Let's go."

Brent nodded, following after Ray when Ray disappeared.

I had to completely ignore what happened, and I just followed Ray. It had happened before and what Brent did wasn't anything new, but Brent was too scared of Ray to do anything. It didn't make it any less nerve wracking when Brent let his hands roam.

We went uptown to another bar. We had been going to so many different ones within the last week and I was getting confused. This one was definitely smaller than the last couple and more packed as well. The light was dark blue and dark purple which was starting to give me a headache.

I was sitting at the bar and ignoring the annoying giggling of some girl a couple seats down. I ignored the girl, drinking my beer and ignoring the persisting flirting from the guy beside me. Annoying girl or annoying guy? I turned away from the annoying guy, looking down the bar at the girl.

She wasn't giggling anymore and the guy she was with was pushing her against the bar roughly. Her face was turned away from me, seeming to just try to get away from him. Then she turned her pretty face toward me and I recognized the girl as Angela Shepard. "No, stop," I could hear her say.

I hopped of my seat and walked toward them. I grabbed the back of the guys jacket and yanked him back.

Jesus. He must've been at least twenty-five.

Angela eyed me, pulling up the strap of her shirt. "Jane?"

I looked at the guy. "She said stop."

The guy smirked at me. He latched his grip onto my upper arm. "Oh, yeah? And what are you -"

The guy was yanked backward and I could see Ray's angry face. "What the hell are you doin' to my girl?" Ray growled, pulling on the guys shirt roughly and then pushing him away. Ray glanced at Angela and then looked at me. "Let's go. I got somethin' I need you to do."

I looked at Angela. "Are you okay?"

"Jane," Ray said lowly.

I looked at him, a sudden bravery coming over me. "Give me five minutes, Ray. Five minutes," I insisted.

Ray grumbled, but walked away.

"I didn't need your help," Angela said, turning back toward the bar.

I took the seat beside her and I smirked. "I used to be just like you."

Angela scoffed. "Spare me. I'm way prettier." I rolled my eyes, just about to walk away but Angela grabbed my arm. "Wait."

My eyebrows rose. "What?"

She sighed, turning in her seat to face me. "Now that you and Tim aren't together -" I winced and she smiled. "I can tell you something."

"Shoot."

"You want to know why I've always hated you?"

I looked at her, putting a showy smile. "Oh, please do tell."

"Alright. I've always hated you because Tim had never been so serious about a chick in his entire life," she said, using gestures of her hands. Angela sighed, a sad look making way to her face. "I knew he'd follow you anywhere and people say you're pretty smart, so I thought you'd go off to college, which Tim would follow you to. I'd be left all alone with..." She made a face. "With Curly."

I scoffed, shaking my head. "Tim would not follow me anywhere. He's got a life here. He's got - he's got his gang - friends, family -"

"Jane, the guys love you."

My eyes widened as I looked at her. "What?"

Angela's brows furrowed and she raised a beer to her lips. "You're even dumber than I thought."

"Jane!"

I looked at Ray, still in a state of shock. "What?"

He grabbed my arm and pulled me across the bar and to some door. "I need you to go in there and make it with this guy."

"What?" I asked, a different type of shock coming over me. "I'm not gonna have sex with some guy for - for -"

"Drugs."

I pushed against his chest. "No, I'm not doing it. I'm not some whore that you can pimp out." I tried to walk away from him.

Ray pushed my shoulders against the door, looking me in the eyes. "You're going to do this." His fingertips grazed my neck. "Or I'll pay a visit to one of the Shepards. Curly or Tim, doesn't matter to me. Take your pick, baby."

"You're not gonna touch anyone," I growled, taking his hands away from me.

Ray didn't touch me again, but it didn't stop him from glaring. "Will you do it or not? He's waiting."

I looked up at him. "This is what you want me for? Do you treat every girl like shit or just me?"

"Girls usually figure I'm no good by the third night," Ray said, smirking a little. "You were the only one that stuck around, so...just you, baby."

Ray was insane. He wanted me to have sex with a total stranger just so he could get a discount on his next high? It didn't even matter what it was because the risk was someone I cared about getting hurt. If I had to close my eyes and pretend I was someone else doing something else for ten minutes to protect the people I didn't want hurt, I'd do it.

I sighed, my eyes not leaving his. "Fine." I took a deep breath in, my hands shaking as turned around and opened the door.

The man was at least thirty, not awful looking but never my type. He had a low-cut button up, displaying his chest hair. His eyes were dark and scary, going nicely with his creepy smile. "Hello, lovely."

I walked closer to him. "Hi."

"What's your name?"

He didn't even know my name? "Jane."

"I'm Mike."

I nodded, looking around awkwardly. "So..."

"How old are you?"

"Legal," I said, not wanting to mess anything up for Ray.

The guy looked me up and down and seemed to hesitate. "Shit, you look young."

I grew self-conscious and crossed my arms over my chest. "Yeah, well, it is what it is."

"How'd you get yourself mixed up in this, kid?"

 _"Don't get yourself mixed up in that, kid." Tim took the joint from my fingers and flicked it onto the ground._

 _I smirked, already riding out a high. "Sorry, baby."_

 _Tim's arm came around my waist. "Let's get you home, huh?"_

 _"Okay." I nodded._

I wanted to go home now.

"Just..." I tried to think of an answer. "It's just who I'm with."

"Ray Tanner is a bad man."

"I know."

He nodded and stood, proving to be much taller than I was. "But so am I. Why don't you take off your clothes, sweetheart."

I didn't protest as I pulled my shirt over my head. He grabbed my shoulders and spun me around, feeling me up over my bra. I closed my eyes, a tear falling over my cheek as he started to reach for my pants.

I didn't open my eyes for the next twenty minutes.

I left the bar as soon as the deed was done, and Ray allowed me too. I walked through the streets, not sure of where I was going.

All I could do was replay the nauseating feeling of a strange man's hands all over my body. The disgust I felt for myself afterward and how much I tried not to cry. I had never felt so violated and sad in my entire life. I had never felt worthless until that moment. I felt like no one cared. I had ruined every decent relationship I had and now I was left with Ray. Just Ray. I was done for. The rest of my life was going to be a hell I could never escape.

I made it to Ray's, sitting on that ratty couch that I never, ever sat on, something poking at me. I reached under the thin cushion and pulled out a revolver.

Oh, shit.

I looked down at the gun, opening the cylinder and seeing that there were bullets in all the chambers. I quickly dumped them out, putting back only one bullet. I sighed down at it. "How about a little Russian roulette?"

I didn't have a death wish and I didn't want to kill myself. But I would leave that up to fate. If it happened, it happened.

I spun the cylinder, ready to play the ultimate game of chance. There was a 1 in 6 chance that I was going to die and I liked those odds.

I held the gun up to my head, hesitating very little before I pulled the trigger. And nothing happened.

I sobbed, the gun falling from my hands and hitting the wooden floor. It bounced away from me before stopping a foot away. I stared at it for a couple of seconds as I cried and then I hid my face in my hands, not holding anything back. I was letting out a month's worth of tears and they were coming fast.

I was at an ultimate low from my life; the lowest of lows.

Things could only get better...

Right?


	16. Chapter 16

**k I am loving these review guys srsly my cheeks hurt from smiling**

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 16:

* * *

"What kind?"

I hadn't left Ray's apartment in another whole week. I didn't want to see anyone and I didn't want to talk with anyone. The only people I even came close to were Ray and Brent - Brent coming too close too many times.

But it was my first outing in a while and I didn't even want to go. But my face and body already ached from my fight with Ray the night before and I wanted to be able to move, so I was going to do what he said.

"What the hell ever," Ray groaned, lifting his head off the bed for long enough to speak. "Anything kind of aspirin. Just get it. And some cigarettes too."

I nodded, exiting the apartment. I walked from Ray's to the department store across town. There were closer ones, but the moment I got out of Ray's, I wanted to stay out as long as possible.

There was a cop sitting outside of the store, smoking a cigarette and having a coffee. I smiled kindly and then walked inside. I went straight for the cigarettes, then I got the aspirin. I grabbed some extra strength tylenol, walking through the medical isle, stopping at the condoms and pregnancy tests.

How convenient. I wondered if it was a scare tactic. Teenagers saw the pregnancy tests and grabbed more condoms than they'd ever need. Whatever the tactic was, I picked up one of the pregnancy tests, reading the directions on the back. They didn't even have the things when I was a kid. In fact, they were a rather new and brilliant invention.

Holding the pregnancy test, I felt intense eyes on me. When I looked up, I saw those blue eyes that I fell in love with. But they weren't on the person I was in love with - quite opposite, actually. They were on Angela.

"Angela?" I said without thinking. I followed her eyes down to the pregnancy test in my hands and my eyes widened. By the time I looked back up, all I saw was her huge brown head of hair running out of the store. "Angela, wait!" I ran after her, exiting the store quickly.

I was shoved down not a second later. The cigarettes, aspirin and pregnancy test spilled from my hands and the cop handcuffed me faster than I had ever remembered them doing that. He yanked me up and turned me toward him, but his eyes were over my shoulder, looking at my contents.

"Oh, no."

I glanced back at the stuff and then looked at him. "I wasn't going to steal it. I was just -"

"Look -" the cop interrupted loudly. "I know the youth of our country is troubled, but there's no reason to take your life, okay?"

I was shocked. "What?"

"If you're really pregnant, there are support groups out there, kid."

I started up at him for a couple of seconds, figuring that I could play this out to my advantage. I made a face like I was going to cry. "I just don't know what to do." I let my head fall down and I sniffled. "He just broke up with me. He doesn't want a kid."

"Jesus," the copper said under his breath, walking to my back and undoing the cuffs.

I rubbed my wrists dramatically. "Thank you."

He sighed. "You seem like a nice girl."

I looked up at him through my biggest eyes. "I was just chasing after that girl. I didn't mean to walk out of the store without paying, officer."

He seemed to be making a decision, which if he was, he made one. "Alright, I'm not gonna take you down to the station. And -" He bent down, picking up all my things. "You can take these free of charge."

I took the items and smiled softly. "Oh, thank you -" I took my first glance at his name tag. "Officer James."

He smiled too, suddenly seeming jolly. "You're welcome, miss."

I walked away, waiting until I was down an alleyway where I couldn't be seen before I pulled out a cigarette and lit it. I would get what I got from Ray later, but I would enjoy the cigarette while I could. I stuffed the aspirin in my back pocket and I opened the pregnancy test.

Oh, shit, Angela. What was she going to say? Hopefully, she had to good sense not to say anything to anyone. Or at least not to Tim. If she wanted Tim all to herself, she certainly wouldn't tell him he had a baby on the way. That would rip him away from her fast enough. I doubted Angela was going to say a damn word. Besides, I wasn't pregnant and I wasn't going to be any time soon - especially not with Tim's baby.

I erased Tim from my mind before I could go into it much further and I just continued walking, examining the pregnancy test and then tossing it aside. I walked inside of Ray's not too long after that, putting the painkillers on the bedside table, slamming them down.

"Jesus!" Ray groaned, his head coming out of the heaps of pillows. He looked up at me, looking very sickly. "Do you gotta be so goddamn loud, Jane?"

"Sorry," I said unapologetically, walking around the bed and into the kitchen. "I'm making a pb&j. You want one or not?"

"Not. You suck at making sandwiches."

"I do not," I grumbled, grabbing a knife.

"You always put on too much peanut - what the hell?"

I glanced over my shoulder and rolled my eyes at Ray's eyes narrowed at something out the window. "What, someone stealing your car?" I chuckled at my toast. "What a shame that would be."

"No. It's Shepard."

I tensed, but tried to act casual. I grabbed the peanut butter, undoing the lid. "Curly?"

"Tim."

I clumsily dropped the lid and then going to pick up the lid, I dropped the knife. I groaned loudly, quickly growing frustrated. "Damnit."

"He's coming into the building." Ray's eyes left the window and he started to stand.

"Stop," I said quickly, running over to him. I thought quickly, pushing him down onto the bed. "You don't look so good."

Ray glared at me. "Out of my way, Jane."

I touched his face lovingly, surprising him. "Come on, Ray. Get some rest," I said softly. "I don't want to be making out with you when you're like this." I smiled, happy that he was letting me push him back onto the bed. I pulled the covers over him and said, "Go back to bed. I'll take care of Tim."

"I'm not sleeping," Ray said in a hard tone, but his head hit the pillow. "Be back in five minutes."

I nodded, turning and running out of the building just as Tim was coming up the stairs. He stopped when he saw me and I stopped when I saw him. We both looked at each other and I breathed out nervously. "Hi."

Tim's surprised face turned angrily immediately. "Hi? _Hi?_ You ditch me at the hospital and never talk to me again and all you've got to say is _hi_?"

I ignored him mostly, walking closer and grabbing his arm. I looked to make sure Ray wasn't following before I dragged him down the stairs and outside. I realized that I was touching him about halfway down and I quickly let go. I moved around the building to the side and out of sight, leaning against the wall. "What're you doing here?"

Tim's hands were on his hips and he looked so good, like always. "I don't know why you broke up with me, Jane, but I want answers now."

"You yelled at me for no reason," I argued, crossing my arms.

"That's not what you're mad about," Tim countered, an angry look still on his face. "You're tougher than that."

I scoffed. "But you can't even apologize?"

"Look, I didn't bother you after you left, alright? I went to your house and asked for you and then I went back again and Paul said that you didn't want to talk to me anymore," Tim was explaining and his anger slowly left him. "So I didn't want to bother you, but I will _not_ let you do this on your own."

"Do what?"

Tim walked closer, sighing heavily as his big hand landed on my stomach. "Raise our kid."

I quickly pushed him away. "Are you kidding me?" A million thoughts were running through my mind and I couldn't even think of a good thing to say back, so I just said, "You can't even raise Curly and you think you could take care of a baby?!"

Tim seemed so determined. He took another step closer and put his hands on my face. "It's my kid, isn't it?"

I pushed him away once again. "I'm not pregnant."

Now Tim just seemed confused. "But Angela said -"

"Angela thinks she saw something, but she didn't," I told him, trying my best not to yell. I sighed, leaning against the wall. "Even if I was pregnant, it'd be a slim chance it'd be yours."

Tim flinched and the put a finger through the loop of his jeans. "Maybe I just wanted to see you."

"Oh." I scoffed, pushing myself off the door, heading toward the door. "Are we being cheesy now?"

"Hey -" Tim grabbed my arm before I could walk past him. He kept me close, ours faces as close as they'd ever been in months. "You gonna tell me what's going on or not?"

"Not," I snarled, only because I knew I'd melt in two seconds if I didn't decide in the moment that I was going to hate him.

Tim growled like an animal, hand still gipping my arm as he walked up to the wall, pushing me against it. "Why are you so difficult?"

"You're the one that dated me!"

"And you're the one that left me!"

I shook my head, looking down. "I should go back inside."

Tim didn't let me, putting his hands beside my head. arms blocking the way out. "Tell me, kid," he said quietly, face close to mine. "Please."

I looked him in the eyes. "I don't know what to say."

"The truth!"

I shoved him back angrily, him barely moving. "Fine!" I pushed him again, not making him move that much that time either. "You really want to know?"

"Yes!" Tim yelled, brows furrowed.

"I broke up with you because - because - 'cause Ray's stupid and you're stupid and everything's messed up and I can't do anything I want and I'm only doing this 'cause I love you, even though you're so -"

Tim's hand found my face, the other on my hip. He pushed me against the wall and kissed me roughly, exactly how I'd expect him to after not doing it for a couple of months. I tried to push him away at first, not wanting to fall into a hole I couldn't get out of, but my will wasn't that strong and neither were my arms. I kissed him back, hands all over him just as his were on me. Our noses rubbed together and lips moved quickly. I moaned into his mouth, earning one back from him.

He was so good and so bad. He was so, so good. He was the nicest guy I had ever met - or at least he was nice to me. He was funny and adventurous and everything I ever wanted and I loved him more than anything. And I just needed him to be happy and safe.

I pushed Tim away, covering my mouth and running away from him. I cried _hard_ as I slammed the door behind me. I ran up the stairs, my foot getting caught on the stairs. My knees hit the hard wood and I stayed there, crying. I moved to sit on the step, putting my head in my hands.

* * *

I waited a whole other week before coming out of Ray's apartment. I needed time to wallow and drown myself in self-pity. Eventually, I surfaced from the sadness and I went out to get groceries for the apartment.

I was unloading the groceries from Ray's car when I saw someone walking up. Maybe not walking. Limping would be a better word.

"Curly Shepard." I smiled widely, glancing down at the cast on his leg before hugging him. "Out in the world, huh?"

Curly had a classic smirk on his face when I pulled away. "Scared?"

"Always."

He sighed, letting the crutches out from under his arms as he leaned against the car. He nodded at the apartment. "You and Ray livin' together?"

I nodded. "Yeah."

Curly nodded, looking out at the road. "Tim's doin' okay."

"Okay?" I pretended not to care.

"I thought you'd want to know. Also, he hasn't so much as looked at another girl, so...it kind of makes you look like a dick now that you're livin' with Ray."

I chuckled, looking over at him. Only Curly would call me a dick. "Thanks, Curly."

He smiled, but it quickly dropped. "Pony says you haven't been to school."

I shrugged. "I guess, yeah."

"He also mentioned the thing with Ray," Curly said to me, smirking even more. "You really like me so much that you'd date this scumbag?"

I glanced at him, leaning against the car beside him. "It wasn't Pony's place to say anything, but, yeah." I looked at him. "I just wanted you to be safe."

"Well, I'm safe now," he said. "You gonna tell Tim or what? It's over now, isn't it?"

I shook my head. "No." I got off the car, grabbing the rest of the groceries. "I'm fine with how things are."

"Bullshit."

I shut the car door and walked toward the apartment. "Don't follow me inside."

"You pushed Pony and Tim away and you're unhappy."

I tried to laugh it off. "Are you high?"

"Jane!"

I turned around, watching him scramble to get his crutches. "Look, Curly..." I sighed. "Ray's in my life, okay? Things are the way they are."

Curly looked at me like I was crazy and he slowly made his way closer to me. "Who are you? Jane..."

I blinked rapidly, holding back the tears. I kissed his cheek quickly, turning around and opened the door to the apartment building. "Maybe I'll see you around, Curly." I walked inside and went up the stairs.

"Jane," Ray greeted once I was inside his place. "Did you get me more cigs?"

"Of course." I reached into my pocket and threw them to him. I watched him catch them and then I timidly asked, "So...do we still have to go to the club tonight?"

Ray said we were going to the club to meet another friend of his. I couldn't stand the thought of having another night like that one. I didn't want to have an awful night with some stranger just to Ray could get on a nice high.

"Yes. Go have a shower or something." Ray stood, clearly having taken the medication and feeling a little better. "I'm gonna go do some stuff."

I nodded, walking into the bathroom and starting a bath. I rubbed my tired eyes as I watched it fill up. I took off my clothes and got in, enjoying the feeling of the warmness soothing my sore muscles. I let me head fall back and I closed my eyes. I ended up falling asleep. I woke up for two seconds, just enough time to turn the bath back on to get some more hot water. Just enough time for me to turn it on and forget to turn it off.

I woke up the second time to Ray's yelling and frantic running. "Jane! Jane!"

I popped up, feeling the wetness sprinkled on my face, the wrinkling on the my fingers and toes. "Wha..." I looked around, realizing that the bathroom floor was completely wet. I stood quickly, wrapping a towel around myself and opening the door, it being revealed that Ray's apartment floor was soaked. "Oh, no."

Ray's eyes snapped up to me and he growled. "Jane."

I ran for the door, holding the towel around me. His stomping behind me made me run faster. I ran straight for his car, getting inside and locking the doors quickly. Knowing that Ray had a bunch of spare keys in stupid places, I lifted up the rug on the car floor and picked up the key.

Ray pounded his hands on the window. "Jane, open this door! Don't you dare drive away! You gotta fix this! Open the door!" He banged harder. "I'm gonna kill you!"

I believed him.

My shaking hands managed to get the key into the ignition. I pressed on the gas, ignoring Ray's screaming and pulling onto the road. I ripped down the street and just drove. I just wanted to be away from Ray.

How could I be so stupid? I was so tired that I fell asleep with the water on. What kind of idiot does that? Ray's floor was ruined probably and he wanted to kill me for it. And I probably deserved it. I was really stupid.

I was driving down the road when I saw someone I sort of recognized. He had his thumb out and a bloody nose. I pulled over, unrolling the window. "You okay?"

His dark hair fell over his face as he leaned down. "Can you give me a ride, doll?"

"Get in," I said, unlocking the door.

He got inside, wiping the blood from his face onto his shirt. "Thanks, uh..."

"Jane."

"King?"

"Yeah."

The guy scoffed. "I find Pony to be the most annoying kid I know, but he's even more annoying when he's talkin' about you. Take me to the Curtis's while we're on the subject."

I smirked, glancing at him. "Steve Randle."

"That's me."

I sighed, going back to what he just said. "Whats Pony say?"

Steve groaned, touching his nose over and over. "He just says that you're makin' a lot of mistakes and you're gonna get yourself hurt or killed or somethin' like that. What're you, hookin'?"

I was offended. "Do I look like a hooker?"

"Whoa, doll face. I've been pretty nonjudgemental so far." Steve's eyes were on me. "I haven't even mentioned the towel."

I was suddenly aware of my bare and still wet arms and legs. I realized how cold and exposed I was. I gripped the wheel nervously. "Oh, shit." I noticed his jacket. "You think you could lend me that?"

He scoffed. "No."

My brows furrowed. "What kind of asshole -"

"What kind of idiot -" Steve interrupted. "Leaves the house in just a towel."

I pulled into the Curtis's driveway. "Out." I looked at him, stern face. "Out!"

Ponyboy walked out of the house at that moment. "Steve, what the hell are you -" He stopped when he saw me and his eyes widened. "Jane."

I got out of the car, walking around the front. "Hey. What's up?"

"Jesus, you're in a towel," Pony said, eyes looking over me in concern. He grabbed my arm a second later, rushing me inside. He brought me to his room and handed me one of his shirts along with a sweater to go over top, and turned around. Then he handed me pants, turning away again.

"I'm done," I said, once the pants were on.

Pony turned around, putting his hands on my arm and rubbing them quickly. "Are you warmer?"

I nodded. "Yeah." I breathed out, walking around him. "Thanks for the stuff. Uh, I guess I'll go."

"What the hell do you mean?" Pony grabbed my arm, spinning me back around. He touched me cold face with his hand and then pushed me toward the bed. "Get under the covers, you're still freezing."

I crawled under the covers and lied there awkwardly. I looked up at him through my eyes and asked him, "Why are you doing this?"

Pony sat on the bed, hand resting on the other side of my knees. "What do you mean?"

I sat up, getting closer to him. "Helping me."

Pony seemed hurt by that comment. "You're my friend, Jane. You're my best friend. I don't like to see you hurt." I quickly hugged him. I wrapped my arms very tightly around him, glad to have someone I loved so much back. That made Pony chuckle. "Okay."

I laughed too, but it quickly turned into a cry. "I'm so sorry for everything. I - I didn't want to disappoint you, but I just -"

Pony pulled me away and looked me in the eyes. "I'm not disappointed and I'm sorry for everything I said before. I just didn't want to see you...I mean, I didn't want to..." Pony sighed and brought me closer. He hugged me again. "I'm just glad you're alive."

We laid back on the bed, my head on his chest, his arm around me. My eyes were fluttering closed. "Can I stay?"

"What have you been telling your brother?"

"I've convinced Paul to tell my mom to tell her that I'm home all the time, but I just go out when she is home. What a coincidence, huh?"

"Jesus, Jane."

"Can I stay or not?"

"Yes."

I closed my eyes, moving away from him and snuggling up to myself. "Thank you."

"Goodnight, Jane."

"Night, Pony."


	17. Chapter 17

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 17:

* * *

When I went back to Ray's, he wasn't there. I laid on his bed and napped for a good portion of the day. I read some books up until noon. Ray still wasn't home, so I decided that I would walk to the Dingo and get something. Maybe I flash my upper leg and get my job back or something.

I was one step out of the apartment and into the hallway before the phone rang. I slipped back inside and walked over to the phone. Assuming it was Ray with an explanation, I said, "Jesus, Ray, where are you?"

 _"Is this Jane King?"_

The seriousness of the woman's voice made me sit in a nearby chair. "Yeah, that's me."

 _"Raymond Tanner has been in an accident. He's awake now and would like to see you."_

"Me?" I said, surprised. "He asked for me? He asked for Jane King?"

 _"You are his partner, are you not?"_

"Uh, yeah," I told the lady on the other line and I stood. "Is he local? Is he at the Tulsa Hospital?"

 _"Yes."_

"What happened?"

 _"He was hit by a car."_

"How bad?"

 _"I'm not advised to say, miss."_

I'm not advised to say. That meant it was bad. She hadn't said anything about Ray being in stable condition, she only said that he was awake.

I said goodbye to the lady and ran - literally ran - off to the hospital. I new my way around and I made it to the front desk quickly. "I'm here for Raymond Tanner."

"Room 132."

I walked down the hallway until I reached the room with the number on it.

An older man in a white coat was just walking out. "Are you Ray's girlfriend?"

"Yeah. Jane King."

The doctor sighed, giving me the biggest look on pity I had ever seen. "I'm so sorry, miss King, we've tried -"

"He's not going to make it," I marvelled, a million thoughts running through my mind before it went blank.

The doctor nodded somberly. "That's correct, yes. He might make the night, but it's not likely."

I nodded, not sure what to say. I watched his hand touch my shoulder comfortingly before he walked around me and told me to take as much time as I needed. I didn't think I needed any. I turned the knob to the door and cracked it. I looked inside before opening it fully. "Sweet Jesus."

Ray was lying on the bed, something around his neck, dried blood _all over_ him and his left eye swollen shut. That was when I noticed that basically the whole left side of his face was ripped apart. I took my eyes away from that part of him and focused on his chest. His shirt was cut open and there was a massive bandage covering his whole abdomen.

"Jane?" His right eye opened and he looked at me.

I wanted to be so mad at him. I wanted to hate him just like I had been for the past year, but I couldn't. And so I pulled up a chair beside him and grabbed his hand. "Hey," I said softly, rubbing his hand with both of mine.

His one eye looked over me. "How are you?"

I smiled lightly, one hand travelling up and rubbing his arm. "I'm fine. How are you?"

He smiled too. "Fine considering I can't feel anything below my neck."

I swallowed un-comfortingly, coughing as well. "Uh, what happened?"

His face was blank. "I don't remember." He squeezed my hand. "It was so loud."

I scooted closer and ran my hand through his thick hair. "It's okay. You're safe here."

He smirked at me. "I'm dying. I can see it on your face."

My mouth fell open. "Ray -"

"Don't," Ray said, still smirking. "I'm just enjoying the fact that you're pretending care."

I shook my head, hand still attached to his. "You are such an asshole."

"But you loved me."

I nodded, not wanting to refuse him that one thing. "I did."

And I really thought that I did. I was just a child when I met Ray, and he was so nice and charming that I immediately took to him. He was charismatic and funny and I fell in love with him. Then he got less romantic and more mean. I fell out of love with him pretty fast.

I sighed. "Do you want me to say anything to your family?"

I knew he had a cousin somewhere in Tulsa.

Ray shook his head as best he could. "No." He looked at me. "Don't you want to know if I loved you back?"

I hesitated, but I eventually nodded. "Yes."

He smiled. "I did. I do." He started to smile, reminding me so much of the Ray Tanner I had met when I was fifteen. "You were just a kid, but you were so pretty. You still are, Jane."

I took a deep breath, my head falling against the bed. It rested on top oh his thigh and I was looking up at him. "Why are you being so nice now?"

"Look, I've been an asshole my whole life, but I don't want to go out that way."

I nodded, continuing to play with his hair. "Do you want any of your friends here?"

"I don't want them seeing my like this, Jane. What're you, stupid?"

I chuckled, picking me head up and scooting closer to his face, making sure to stay to the right. "Remember when we used to go to the movies all the time?"

Ray smiled. "I'd sneak us in and we'd make out the whole time."

I smiled too. "Those were some really good days."

He stopped smiling. "Do you love Tim?"

I debated on whether I should've lied, but I didn't. "Yes."

Ray nodded, hand cupping around mine. "Then just kiss me and get out."

"Ray -"

"Jane -" he said painfully. "Just say your goodbye now."

"No."

"Fine, I'll go first," Ray said in a rough tone. "I'm sorry for the way I've been treating you, Jane. You're the only girl I've ever loved and the only one I ever will," he said very unemotionally, but there was a glisten in his eyes.

All of it was happening so fast.

"I'm not ready," I told him, shaking my head.

He closed his eyes and sighed. "Just remember to move on, alright? Get your job back, go to school. Just go back to how things were before I fucked them up, Jane."

I kissed him passionately, sticking mostly to the right corner of his mouth. I exhausted all the leftover love I had for him in that one kiss and then I leaned away. I touched his face. "A girl never forgets her first love. You were mine." I stood up and got out of the room as fast as I could.

Shit.

I leaned up against the wall, eyes wide and mind full. I hadn't cried yet, but some tears started to fall down my cheeks. But that was it. I wiped them away and that was that.

Ray was dying. I knew he was a shitty person, but I couldn't help but think that I was missing a little part of my life - of my past. Ray was such an important character in my life and he was going to be taken out just like that.

It just all happened so fast.

"Jane?"

I stopped and turned around, spotting Mr. Ryans. "Hi."

He smiled widely. "What are you doing around the hospi -" He must've noticed the look on my face because he stopped. "Never mind."

"What are you doing here?" I countered, not wanting to think about Ray at all.

"I give blood."

"Nice." I spun around, starting to walk away.

"Wait!"

I turned around again. "Yes?"

"I've been trying to get ahold of you," Ryans said, walking closer. "Your story came in second place."

I nodded, storing that information in the back of my busy mind. "Cool." I started to walk away again.

"Jane!"

"Yes?" I looked over my shoulder at him. God, he wore a tie even out of school. And I thought he was cool.

"I'll see you tomorrow for the final essay, right?"

"Oh, shit," I said, thinking aloud.

He ignored my foul language, the seriousness crinkling up on his forehead. "It's the only thing that'll make you pass. Your attendance hasn't been great lately, Jane."

I sighed, rubbing my face and saying, "Yeah. Yeah, you'll see me there."

"Great!"

I turned around and walked away before Ryans could call me back. I went straight home - not Ray's apartment. I went to my house that I had grown up in my whole life. I wanted to lay on my own bed and sleep for just once.

When I walked inside, Paul came into the living room looking alarmed. He stopped being tensed when he saw me. The stubble on his face was new to me, but it was happening. I guess he decided to stop shaving.

He smiled at me. "Hey, stranger."

"Hi," I greeted back, my voice shaking a little.

"Breakup with with candyass yet?" Paul asked, going back into the kitchen. I sat down on the couch as I started to cry. Silent at first, hand over my mouth, Paul just said, "Janey?" He came out into the living room and saw the state I was in. He walked closer and wrapped his arms around me. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"He - he died," I managed to get out, crying violently. Everything hurt.

"It's okay," Paul said gently.

His stubble made him look like David, now he was acting like him. He was gentle and concerned and nice. Paul was turning into David. When did that start to happen? How long had I really been gone? How much had I missed?

I hugged him back. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, Janey."

I let more tears falling, not finding the strength inside to stop them. "Can I come home?" I moved away from him and looked back up at him.

Paul's face broke into a smile. "You can come back if you stop bein' such a wimp."

I cried and pushed his shoulder.

Maybe Paul wasn't turning into David after all. Maybe Paul was just turning into an older version of Paul. Either way, I loved my brother and I was _so_ glad to be home.

* * *

"Are you listenin'?"

I stopped eating my toast and I looked up at Paul. "Huh?"

Paul sighed, putting his plate in the sink. "I've got to work but I'll take my break early and take you to school for that test."

"Okay."

"Be ready at 2."

I could've just gone to school at the right time, but I didn't want to be there and Paul knew that. The less time I spent at that school, the better. I slept in until 9 and I had peanut butter toast for breakfast. I was slowly coming down from my hard time with Ray. I imagine he'd be dead by now.

"You gonna be okay here alone, Janey?" Paul asked, grabbing his coat.

I nodded and offered up a smile. "I'll be fine."

"Great. See you later." Paul slammed the door and I watched him through the window as he drove away.

I decided the get dressed and go out to the Dingo.

I had already taken so much time doing nothing with my life. I slowly ruined myself, but I was getting back on track. Ray's death hurt me, though it probably shouldn't have, but I wasn't going to drone on forever. Ray wasn't the best, but he did say one thing; move on. If I was going to listen to anything, I was going to listen to that.

When I walked into the Dingo, I went straight to the manager at the back. "Joe?"

Joe looked up, smile on his face. "Well, well, well, look who came crawling back."

I gave him a look. "I need my job back."

His smile dropped and he held a clipboard at the side of his big belly. "You think you can just not show up to any of your shifts for weeks and then come waltzing in, expecting to get your job back?" He waited for my response, which was a simple twirl. He sighed and pointed his chubby finger at me. "You're lucky you look so good in a skirt, King."

I smiled, slipping under the counter and running to the back. "I can work until 1:30 today. And I need to call my brother."

"Do it on you break, King."

"Alright. Thanks, Joe."

"Whatever."

I called Paul and told him to pick me up at the Dingo instead, which he was glad to hear. He came and picked me up and took me to school. He wished me luck and sent me off, telling me that he'd pick up me up 3 o'clock. I went inside and I aced that test. I realized I was done being that way I was and I was going to get my life back on track.

I got my job back and did my test that would get me to pass English. I just needed to do one more thing - well, two more things. Three actually.

I spent the next few days at Ray's, answering his phone and getting his mail. I cleaned up the place starting packing stuff up, even though I knew whoever was going to take the stuff was just going to throw it out anyway.

I was taping up one of the last boxes when the phone rang.

"Hello?" I said, tucking the phone between my ear so I could finish the box.

 _"Hello, I'm looking for Jane King."_

"This is she."

 _"The burial site for Raymond Tanner has been finished. The gravestone that was chosen ended up working out."_

The phone slipped from my shoulder into my hand. "Wow. Uh, thank you."

 _"Have a good rest of your day, miss King."_

"Thank you." I hung up. I taped up the last box and grabbed my coat. I walked outside and into the slowly chilling air. I walked across town to the cemetery and just walked along.

I wasn't in a rush or anything, so I just walked until I saw it.

It was one of the cheapest headstones - very plain. Carved into it was:

 **Ray Tanner**

 **March 12 1949 - November 24 1970**

It didn't say his full name. He hated being called Raymond. And it didn't say anything him like 'a beloved friend' or anything like that. What was there to say? It was just a grey headstone with some information on it.

I took the cigarette from my mouth and looked at it. "This is my last one," I said aloud to myself. I carefully resisted the cigarette on top of the middle on the headstone. "This one's for you, Ray."

Across the street was a phone, where I called Paul and was asking him to come pick me up, or more like begged.

"Please, please, please -"

 _"Jane, what are you doing at a cemetery? I mean, what idiot paid for a headstone for that guy anyway?"_

I sighed. "Me."

His tone softened just a little. _"Oh. Sorry, Janey."_

"It's fine. So, how about that ride?"

 _"It's still a no."_

"Paul!"

 _"Look, I'm at this girl's house and I'm about to seal the deal,"_ he said, disgusting me in the process. _"I've been riding this out for months, I can't just skip out on her now - for my own sanity."_

"You're appalling."

 _"Walk."_

"Paul -" The line went dead. "Pau - Paul? Paul!" I groaned loudly, hanging up the phone and walking down the sidewalk. I shoved my hands in my pockets and barely walked five feet before a car car drifting around the corner of the street.

The windows were unrolled to let me hear the loud music. The car pulled over about twenty feet in front of me and Brent go out, along with two other guys from Ray's gang.

I sighed, stopping on the sidewalk and saying loudly, "Nice to see you guys."

Brent walked closer, toothpick between his teeth. God, he was tall. "You just come from the cemetery."

"Nah," I said, shrugging and looking around at the nothingness. "I just walk around here some times. It's very..." I nodded. "Scenic."

"Ha-ha," Brent mocked, taking the pick from his mouth. "I saw him that night, you know."

"Who?" I pretended not to know, just to piss him off.

Brent growled. "Ray. He stopped by the bar and asked if we'd seen you. He running around lookin' for you."

I tried not to let that sink in as I wiggled my cold hands in my pockets. "Okay."

"If you hadn't of run of like that, Ray wouldn't have been runnin' around. He wouldn't have been hit and he'd still be alive." Brent sounded really monotone where he'd usually be in an uncontrollable rage.

I shook my head. "Brent, you're hurt, alright?" I tried to give him some logic. "You lost your friend and -"

His huge hand wrapped around my neck and he swiped his foot, knocking me down. He knelt down beside me as a writhed on the ground, still holding his hand against my neck. He wasn't trying not choke me and he wasn't doing it that hard. He was just trying to hold me down. " _You_ killed him."

I was done with him. I ignored it every time he'd grope me when Ray and I went out. I ignored his sexual comments toward me. I ignored it when he damn near raped me and I ignored it when he scared me. I was done ignoring or dismissing the way he acted. Ray bad a bad person, but Brent was malicious.

"If you don't piss off, I'll kill _you_ ," I said, looking him right in the eyes.

Brent laughed lowly, smiling as he crawled over me. He let go of my neck and grabbed my arms, pinning them beside my head. "How are you gonna do that without your fingers?" He chuckled, picking up one of my hands as one of the other guys held my other arm down.

"No! No, Brent!" I begged. I wanted my fingers. "Please, please, what do you want from me?!"

"I want Ray alive!" Brent yelled in my face, the nice act completely gone.

I kicked my legs, trying to get away. "Please!"

Brent held out his arm to the guy behind him. "Blade."

The guy slowly reached into his pocket, his baby face red, hands shaking.

"Help me!" I screamed at him. "Please!"

"Shut up," Brent said harshly, looking back at the guy. He couldn't have been more than fifteen years old. "Max, blade now."

"Come on, man," the guy - Max - said. His hand was in his pocket, but he wasn't handing over the blade. "What makes you think she won't snitch?"

"She won't," Brent said surely. "She knows better."

"We won't know that for sure unless we kill her," he said, voice crack in the middle. He glanced at me nervously. "And we're not gonna kill her, right?"

"Maybe we should," the one holding down my arm said. "What if she does snitch?"

Brent growled at the two of them. "What'd I say to you guys? We're not gonna kill her." Brent looked down at me, smirking. "She's too pretty." He looked back at the two of them. "She's never snitched before."

"No ones ever cut a finger off her before," Max said to him. Correct. He shrugged. "So let's just cut her up a little and leave it at that."

Brent looked down at me once more, eyes dark. "Just give me the blade."


	18. Chapter 18

Disclaimer: I don't own 'The Outsiders'

Chapter 18:

* * *

 _"Shut up, Paul."_

 _"You shut up, Jane."_

 _I rolled my eyes. "You know damn well the only reason we left the house is to avoid dad. Why you followed me to the drive-in, I don't know. You don't have to be here."_

 _"I didn't follow you. You followed me. Now give me some money for popcorn."_

 _I took out the change I had in my pocket and put it into his hand. "Treat yourself, doll."_

 _Paul's hand reached up and pushed my head. He grumbled and walked away before I could hit him back._

 _"That guy botherin' you?"_

 _I looked up at the man in front of me. I couldn't see much of him because of the darkness of the night and the lit screen being behind him, but he sounded trustworthy enough. "Nah, I'm good."_

 _"You shouldn't be around here with the likes of him, sweetheart."_

 _I chuckled. "He's my brother, not my boyfriend."_

 _"You're a King?"_

 _My brows furrowed. "Who'd you say you were again?"_

 _"I didn't." He sat down in the seat next to me and looked at me, at least one side of his face illuminated by the drive-in screen. He had intense and wonderful eyes and a smirk on his lips. "I didn't know David and Paul had a littler sister. How little are you, doll?"_

 _"Stop calling me doll."_

 _"Well, what's your name then?"_

 _I grew annoyed of his presence, no matter how pretty he was. "Jane, now cut out."_

 _"Jane King. You're very pretty, Jane King."_

 _I hated myself for blushing. I wasn't that type of girl. "Thanks," I said unenthusiastically, hoping it'd throw him off a bit._

 _"How old are you?"_

 _"How old are **you**?" I looked him in the eyes._

 _He smiled widely, proving the be even more handsome with a smile. "I like you, Jane." He scooted closer, nearly in my seat. "What do you say we get out of here, huh? Go somewhere more private." His fingers touched my cheek, rubbing softly. "Come on, baby. I'd never hurt you. You can trust me."_

 _"I don't even know your name."_

 _"It's Ray."_

 _Maybe I was feeling rebellious or stupid or courageous, but I ended up walking off with him, making out with him ten minutes after that and then in the backseat of his car twenty minutes after **that**._

 _I knew it was stupid, but he seemed good. Well, he seemed bad, actually, but he was a good kisser and a good everything else._

I blew the smoke into the air. My back was getting cold against the tomb stone and I felt like I was going a little crazy. "This is the last one, I swear," I said aloud to no one in particular.

I twirled the cigarette between my fingers - two of my five fingers. I had five fingers on my right hand and five on my left. I had all my fingers and all my toes, even though they felt like they were going to fall off from the cold. I had all of that, but I did have blood all on my face and hands and jeans and shirt. My blood, but some of Brent's.

Brent must've not have felt like cutting off any fingers because he just went straight for my face. He cut my cheek first before he cut me twice more - once on my shoulder and one more time on my stomach. He kicked me and punched me, where I fought back a little. There was a little spat of blood on the thigh of my jeans where I punched Brent in the mouth.

I was just thankful it was only Brent. Max had gone back to the car. He didn't want to see. Poor kid. The other guys was ordered a way from Brent. It was too personal. Brent felt like he needed to hurt me on his own. He probably felt like I targeted him on purpose - that I killed Ray just to get at him. Brent was crazy. And strong.

My face hurt and no doubt was bruised a little bit. Most likely, I had a couple little ones on my face and huge ones on the rest of my body. It ached and hurt as I leant up against Ray's headstone at the cemetery.

I felt dirty, but I almost liked it. Brent was punching hard and I thought he was getting his anger out. Hopefully, it'd be the last time he did that. Now that I wasn't around him or Ray or those type of people, I wouldn't be getting beaten up every other day.

I could move on.

I finished the cigarette, knowing it'd be my last one for a while. I stomped on it and started walking. I walked back across town and into a neighbourhood I used to go to all the time. Walking up to that small, blue house was making me a little nervous, but I just wanted to see him.

I knocked and a curly-headed girl opened the door. "Oh, it's you."

I looked past Angela. "Is Tim here?"

"No."

I sighed. "Great."

"You look like shit."

"Thanks," I said, glaring at her.

"I heard Ray died."

I nodded. "Yeah."

She leaned against the doorway, arms crossed over her chest. She was chewing gum and giving me a weird look. "I'm sorry for your loss."

My brows furrowed and I shook my head. "No, you're not."

She smiled. "No, I'm not. He was an asshole and never treated any girl the way she deserved."

"Yeah." I nodded slowly, turning on my feet. "Anyway, I'll see you later, Ang."

"You're gonna go around town lookin' like that?"

I didn't turn around. "Yes."

"Come inside and shower, dumbass."

I turned around, looking at her skeptically. "What, is it a $5 entry fee?"

Angela sighed, taking a step aside and holding the door open wide. "Tim should be home soon. Have a shower, hang around, whatever." She didn't wait for me to walk in before she walked away.

I went back up the steps and walked inside. I closed the door and went to the bathroom, where I stripped down and got into the shower. I turned on the hot water, sighing loudly.

The hot water felt good against my skin. It sank into my muscles and through my whole body - or at least that what it felt like.

 _"Why don't you?"_

 _"Why don't I what?"_

 _"Ask for a raise," I said, spitting the toothpaste from my mouth into the sink. "You're obviously the best worker there."_

 _"Maybe I will," Tim said from behind the curtain._

 _I watched the smoke raise from above the shower head. "Jesus, how hot is that shower?"_

 _Tim pulled back the shower curtain a little ways. "Want to find out?"_

I tried not to think about any of the memories and just shower. Everyone once in a while, I would look down at the drain and watch the red water sink down. I stayed in the shower until the water sinking down the drain was clear again.

I got out, wrapping a towel around my body and hair, walking into Tim's room.

It looked exactly how it did the last time I was in there. It seemed like not one thing had been moved, not even his bed, which he couldn't ever make properly.

I walked around the room and touched a lot of things, all of them bringing back certain moments I missed. When I made it to the dresser, I rummaged through before I found a big t-shirt of his. I pulled on my underwear, leaving the bra on the ground, and then put on the big t-shirt. I crawled into the warm and comforting bed, pulling the covers over me and resting my head on the pillow.

I looked at the window, blinds closed until I felt myself drifting off. I didn't know how long I was asleep, but the window was still there with light coming from the corners when I woke up.

There were muffled voices in the living room as I sat up and rubbed my eyes.

The door to Tim's door opened quickly after that and Tim came through. He paused when he saw me on the bed, slowly closing the door behind him. "Jane."

I looked him over before looking him in the eyes. "Hey."

He looked so good. I mean, he looked the same as he did, which was good. Every second I spent looking at him just made me love him more and more.

Tim stayed at the door and put his hands on his hips. "What're you doin' here?"

I looked down at the bed, rubbing the sheets between my fingers. "I don't know. I just..."

Tim walked over to the blinds and opened them. "How long have you been here?"

"I don't know."

He turned around, taking one look at my face before groaned loudly. "Jesus, kid, what happened?"

I closed my eyes, falling back agains the bed. "Nothing. At least you know it wasn't Ray."

"Sorry about your loss," Tim said, using the exact same tone as Angela.

"No, you're not."

"No, I'm not."

I put a hand over my eyes in the fear that I would cry. "I'm here because I missed you." I kept my eyes closed and I waited for his response, which seemed to take forever to come.

"Move over."

I rolled over and fixed the blankets as he climbed in. I lifted my head when he put his arm out, resting my head on his shoulder. I put my arm around his torso as his curled around my waist. Our legs tangled together and I never felt so at home and happy than I had in the moment. Feeling his warm body against mine was something I needed months ago. Now that I had it, I felt myself relaxing for the first time in what seemed like an eternity.

"I'm sorry about everything," I said softly.

"Don't apologize."

I leaned up and pecked his lips slowly and softly before nestling back into a comfortable spot. I closed my eyes and let our breathing fall into sync before I started to drift off again.

"Kid."

"Hm?" I hummed in response, too tired to do anything else.

"I told you that I love you, right?"

"No."

"Well, I do."

My finger traced shapes on his chest. "I love you too."

* * *

The pale yellow dress I was wearing wasn't anything too flattering, but everyone knew that you're never supposed to look better than the bride. The colour looked good with my skin tone, but not at all with the bruises on my arms. The four days I had been given to heal weren't long enough to make them not noticeable.

It didn't matter anyway. Every single persons eyes were on Molly, who was standing at the alter in a pretty, white dress in front of my brother, who I had never seen wear a tux before. Everyone's eyes were on them - well, almost everyone.

I held the flowers between my fingers, looking at the back at the maid of honours head, half-listening to the sappy vows my brother and his very-soon-to-be-wife were exchanging. I felt eyes on me and I made a quick glance to the guests.

The only reason I invited Tim was because he had nothing to do. I hadn't expected him to come or want to come, but he did. He put on a button up shirt and tucked it into his ratty old jeans. He still wore his converse and had a pack of cigarettes in his back pocket and his hair was still greased back. He sat in the back row and stared at me the whole entire time.

Our eyes met and I smiled. I laughed quietly to myself and mouthed subtly, "Stop."

Tim smirked, not looking away.

The ceremony was over pretty soon after that. David and Molly kissed and everyone clapped, including me. I fixed the hem of my dress as I followed the other bridesmaids out of the church.

Everyone went around back to have the reception. Their were tables and chairs, one table bigger than the other, where the bride and grooms family sat. The other tables were smaller with less chairs. The table in the middle of everything was completely empty and I was anticipating there to be a cake.

As everyone was settling in, I walked over to the table Pony and Curly were sitting at. David said I could bring three friends and I chose as wisely as I could.

"Hey, bend over again, sweetheart."

Maybe inviting Curly wasn't so wise.

I smacked the side of his head. "Curly!"

He rubbed his curly head of hair and smirked up at me. "You look pretty damn nice too, Jane."

I smiled a little. "Shut up."

"No, you really look like a girl."

I gave him a look. "You sayin' I'm usually looking like a boy?"

Curly held up his hands in defence. "I ain't sayin' nothin'."

I looked over at Pony. "Do I look boyish?"

Pony hesitated for a short second. "Not today you don't."

I laughed lightly, reaching out putting my around around his shoulders. My hip rested against the side of his chair. "You guys gonna be okay on your own?"

Curly nodded. "Yeah."

I looked at Pony, never trusting Curly's answer. "Again, you guys gonna be okay on your own?"

Pony smiled softly, patting my lower back. "Of course."

I nodded and walked through the nicely set up tables. I walked on the grass until I reached the small church. I quickly made my way through it, always feeling like I shouldn't be allowed in the holy house, to a back room, knocking lightly.

"Come in!"

I opened the door to see both of my brothers, David fixing Paul's tie. "Hey." I looked at David. "You completely booked it and I didn't get a chance to say congratulations."

David gave up on Paul's tie, an ever-lasting smile on his face as he wrapped his arms around me. He hugged me tightly, lifting my feet off the ground and spinning me around. "I'm married!"

I laughed, waiting until my feet were on the ground before I said, "Yeah, I know. I was there."

He kissed my cheek, still smiling when he pulled away. His face would be hurtin' tomorrow, but he didn't seem to care. "I'm just so happy. I mean, two years ago, I thought none of this would happen. Now, I'm moved out, promoted at work, and married to the chick I love."

I smiled, rubbing his upper arm lovingly. "I'm really happy for you, David."

He looked at me, little crinkles already forming around his eyes. He looked so happy. "Thanks, Jane."

"Okay, but tell me you aren't at least a little disappointed you won't be able to get any other girls for the rest of your life."

I glared at Paul. "Paul!"

David laughed, his hand landing on Paul's shoulder. "You'll understand one day, Pauly."

Paul snorted, pulling out a cigarette and putting it in his mouth. "Like damn hell I will. The only finger I'm ever puttin' a ring on is that of Raquel Welch."

"Because that's going to happen," I said sarcastically, grabbing the cigarette from his lips. "Do you know where you are right now? Swearin', smokin' a cigarette - Paul, you're in the house of God."

Paul smirked at me. "When did you become such a square?"

I rolled my eyes, turning around and almost out the door. "Just tryin' to keep us in God's good graces, Pauly." I walked outside of the church, cigarette still in hand. When I spotted Tim on his own by on of the tables, I walked over to him. "You doin' okay?"

He nodded, thumbs in his belt loops. "Yeah, I'm good, kid." He looked me up and down obviously. "You good?"

I smirked. "I don't know, am I?"

He put his arm around me, pulling me into his side. "Very." His nose touched mine, lips following very soon after. He kissed me for a couple of seconds before abruptly sitting down in a chair. He pulled me into his lap, showing no bother to have me that close to him in front of all the people at the wedding.

He saw the cigarette in my hands. "Why do you have that?"

"Oh, it's not mine. I took it from Paul." I held it out to him. "You want it?"

Instead of taking it and lighting it like I thought he would, he shook his head. "No. I"m trying not to."

"What?" I asked, eyes wide. "Since when have you refused a cigarette _ever_?"

Tim shrugged lightly, tapping his fingers against the clothed table. "Just some stupid thing some girl told me about cigarettes shortening your life."

I smirked. "She sounds pretty smart."

Tim looked at me, almost no expression. "Pretty, too."

My eyes narrowed, though I couldn't not smile. "What are you playin' at?"

Tim didn't say anything for a second and then his hand touched my lower back, rubbing it gently. "You already ran off once, kid, and who knows when you're gonna run off again. I think I oughta step my game up this time around."

It wasn't what I expected. I mean, it wasn't like Tim went around and said much about his thoughts or feelings. I also had to do my best as just guessing. If this was his way of telling me he loved me, I'd take it.

Everything was so right. Everything had gone from good to bad to really, really bad to good to great in a span of a few months. It was a roller coaster for sure, but at least Tim was waiting for me when it was all over. And I had never felt so connected and in love with someone in my entire life. I didn't know a damn thing about soulmates, and I couldn't tell you what it was if you asked, but I had a sneaking suspicion that Tim was it for me.

I smiled at him. "I like that."

"If you like that, you'll love this." Tim grabbed my hips and pushed me off of him lightly. He stood, took a swig of a beer on the table and then held out his hand, smirk playing on his nice, sweet lips. "Wanna dance?"


	19. Chapter 19

The End

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This story has come to and end. I loved writing it and reading the views. Maybe I'll surprise you one day and post more, but (to me) this story has concluded.

But there are more Outsiders stories from me to come.

Thank you. Hope you enjoyed the story.

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